Blarney Hotels
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Kissing The Stone
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When I was a child, I use to have a book by Richard Scarry. It told stories of different animals from around the world. An English cat that found the Queen's ring, an Aussie kangaroo that fed baby orphaned koalas, but there was one that I remember, and I always wanted to go there. It was about a pig that couldn't talk, and he was in Ireland, so his Dad did the only thing that he knew which could start him speaking, so he made the boy kiss the Blarney Stone.
It's not a long drive from Cork to Blarney, but as there are loads of one way roads in Cork, we got lost. It is only 8 K's away, so we managed to find our way there. We parked the family truckster, and as we were half an hour early, we took a walk around. Two minutes later, we had seen it all. Then I spied a bike with Aussie flags on it. When the owner came out, I struck up a convo with him. He worked at the castle, and told us to stick close to him. At the entrance, he told the ticket people we were with him, as we were old friends in fact, and freebies we were given. Sometimes, it's good being Uncle Davros, willing to talk to anyone, because doors do occasionally open !!! He gave us a quick history lesson, before he left us to our own devices. Apparently, its been owned by the same family for centuries, but they built a newer version for themselves, and this is where they now live. We walked up to the entrance of the castle and joined a queue of old and very over weight Seppoes. As we climbed some steps, the age old complaints of why are there not lifts installed came out, and all I could think was, if you climbed the steps, you might lose some weight !!! Thankfully, half of them dropped out !!! There were various rooms leading off of the main stairs, which we looked at, and then we popped out at the top. As we looked over the edge, the newer stately family home came into view. Maybe in another couple of hundred years time, we will tour that one ??? Then the stone came closer. It was a production line of get on your back, lean backwards, kiss the stone, have your photo taken, next !!! Lucy was gearing up for it, whilst I started to freak. All I could think was germs and hepatitis, so I told Lucy, I couldn't do it out of fear of catching some outrageous contagious disease !!! So I didn't. I did however watch Lucy and be the official photographer. Once over, in fact it took around thirty seconds, we climbed down, again looking in different rooms. At the bottom, we had a walk around the base, and on one side we looked up and could see the punters kissing the stone. Onto some walls, though some trees and we ended up in a cave. The sign said that there was meant to be gold hidden in there, but our torch was in the car, so we went in as far as the flash from my camera would let us. All we saw was a load of mud, so we chucked a ewey and we made our way over to the gardens. There were some massive leafed plants, and a couple of yew trees which impressed us both and then we ended up at some steps. The local legend is that if you walk down backwards, you can make a wish and it will come true, so Lucy did it, made a wish but I don't know if it came true as she wouldn't tell me what she had wished for. Up the top were some more little caves which were meant to be home of a witch and another for a sorcerer. There were also some standing stones which were meant to be in a circle, which I couldn't make out and a witches head which I could. As I walked around some more of it, all I could think of was The Hobbit and The Lord of The Rings. Maybe it was my imagination, maybe it was coming down from the drugs that I have now stopped taking, but I'm sure I saw Bilbo Baggins amongst the trees !!!
There wasn't anything left to see, so we finished our visit and jumped back into the car and returned to Cork.
It's funny, I want to return, even try and kiss the stone next time, but if I do, I think I will wear plastic lip covers and give the stone a good scrubbing !!! Oh well, sometimes it's hard being Uncle Davros
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