The Beating Drum

Trip Start Aug 23, 1996
Trip End Ongoing

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Thursday, October 13, 2005

Amazingly, the Jaffa was only 1 1/4 hours late !!! So we found our seats, lay down and went to sleep. four hours later, we were pulling into Lahore, our home for the next few days. We were so excited to be in the Lion, Imran Khan's home town. My number one homie !!!


Once off the train, Lucy, saw a McDonalds and wanted to Westernise out !!! But as we are now suffering Ramadan, where we can only eat at the end of the day, it was closed !!!!! So she starved, yet again !!! Most probably good for me, considering, I still don't know if I am pissing or shitting !!! And as soon as we realised it was closed, we were mugged by the taxi/rickshaw drivers. Everywhere I turned, I could not escape them, and they were giving me pathetic prices, and realistically, the way I was feeling, I was in no mood for fucking about with these guys. However, we met one who had a little brain, and he gave us a proper price, so we were once again off, to our new home. And this time it was the Regale Internet Inn. A room was quickly sorted, and then we had a quick walk around, trying to get to know a little bit of Lahore. Off we walked and found Charing Cross !!! Totally different to the one I know, no train station, or water even, but on all four corners, were people asking for donations to the earthquake appeal. We dug our hands in our pockets and gave. After seeing Bam, it ws the right thing to do. I still was feeling like shit as we walked around, so we went back, so I could die. Once I had done a Jesus, we had a quick meal, before we retired to the rooftop, as this was the place to hang, when in Lahore


After our English breakfast of eggs and toast, we went off to see the Lahore fort. A rickshaw took us to the Delhi Gate, where we then could walk through the bazzar. Our first stop was to see an old hammaam. We were hounded by beggars, but we stayed and ignored them. Moving onto the Mosque of Wazir Khan, it was very impressive. The LP says it is deteriorating, but the tiles were great. Maybe I am easily impressed. Onwards we went, even taking the wrong roads. We popped around a corner, and we saw the walls, but I also saw some young homies playing street cricket, so I demanded the ball, and the kids were surprised when I was able to roll my arm over. First up, a wide, and then the wickets started to tumble. Then it was my turn for a hit. By this stage, we had drawn a crowd. I gave my wicket away though, after one two many attempts for the long on 6 !!! Up straight to the paying booth, I noticed that locals pay 10 Ruppee, whilst tourists pay 200 Ruppee. I lost it, and told them that they should be ashamed of themselves. From that point on, I spoke to nobody. We walked around. It was pretty good. We ran into some people who were staying at our hotel, and they said it was very similar to the forts in India !!! Who knows, I suppose I will find out in the future. After we finished, we tried to enter a Gurdwara, that is very special for Sikhs. But as we are not Sikhs, the fuckers would not let us in !!! Instead, we had a weigh in. I was amazed, I have lost 10 Kilos since we have left London, but sadly, Lucy has only lost 1.5 K's !!! So we moved onto the largest Mosque in Pakistan. The Badshahi Mosque. Made out of red sandstone, with four minarets, it is very impressive. It is meant to be able hold up to 10000 people, but today, there was around 100. Much more relaxed. By this stage, Lucy had picked up a man. My little personal guide had fucked off, as I had told him to, so I had a peaceful trip. Lucy, however, was in. She was moving to Bahrain, so now I am after a younger model !!!!! Sadly, she ditched him, so we went back and retired for the evening in the hotel


Sleeping in is great. We decided we would go to the post office. We just had to find it first !!! We found a satellite office and then went looking for Zamzama. After a short while, we were lost, we were walking in the wrong direction. We realised this when we made it to the zoo. We turned around and headed back. We kept on walking until we came to the GPO. It was very impressive and very British looking. Understandably, considering how long the British were here. Past the Lahore Museum, which was closed as it had received cracks from the earthquake, and then onto Zamzama. Now Zamzama is a huge gun, that was built near 300 years ago in Kabul and has been taken all over the sub continent by the Sikhs, but now rests in Lahore. Rudyard Kipling wrote about it in his book Kim. Once back, we hooked up with a Pom by the name of Alexander, as we were going to Waggah to see the closing of the border. On the way, I told him about my weight loss, he stated that he had only been putting it on. I sensed a little green tinge in his eyes !!! Once there, we watched the guards goosestep, foot stamp, march, yell and shake hands with their Indian counterparts. It was great to see. Hopefully, we will be able to watch from the Indian side in a month or two


Getting used to this sleeping in business, once up, Lucy sorted her bag out as she needed to send some stuff home. We made our way down to the GPO, but before we could send, a post wallah had to make a box and cover it in white cloth first of all. The people inside were so friendly. No waiting in front of the counter, straight behind to help out !!! Now in Lahore, Thursday is Sufi night, and at 21:00, we all jumped into a taxi to see this at the Shah Jamal. Basically, there are a couple of drummers who drum, or so we were told. I lost everyone straight away as it was really crowded, and sat with my homies. As soon as I sat, I have never seen so much hash in my life, and the joints never stopped being rolled. Being the only tourist around, they were all coming my way, and I was getting wasted quickly. The only thing to do was to grab another Aussie called Marcus, and soon, he was smashed as well !!! Now the drumming was being done by two brothers. One looked like a Pakistani version of Barry White !!! After a while, some Pakistani hippies got up and danced. There was Greenie, he was wearing green. Henna, his hair and beard was covered in Henns. Spinny, he was spinning all the time, and finally, Blowie, he would not stop blowing his horn. Their dancing was not really dancing, but these guys had been smoking non stop all night, hence the zombie like dance they were doing. Barry, then, complete with drums, and still drumming, started spinning himself. Fuck, it was so amazing to watch. By 01:00, the smoking and the drumming had stopped. We all went looking for our sandals, but some fucking homie stole mine. Bastard !!!!!


To taxed to do anything, I did say goodbye to Alexander an told him to be like me and become thin !!! I did have one thing to do and that was go back to the old city and try and buy some sandals as I know, my thongs will not last. I looked over loads of places and was getting nowhere, as I came towards the Delhi gate, I found a homie selling thongs, the largest size being 11, and this was small. But the troubling thing was that the homie kept giving me smaller ones !!! He could not get his head wrapped around that 9/10 were smaller than 11. We decided to go visit the Golden Mosque for some inspiration. It was full of homies, and it did not give me any inspiration, so we left and walked through the Delhi gate. Just as we exited, we found another thong shop, and as usual, they were to small, but then he pulled out the big guns, and this homie showed me a pair of rubber clogs !!!For 100 Ruppee, I was sorted.


Up early, we packed and said goodbye. Found a rickshaw and went to the bus station, as we are now headed for Islamabad as we need an Indian visa, so that we can keep this adventure going


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