The Spanish

Trip Start Aug 23, 1996
Trip End Ongoing

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Flag of Spain  ,
Monday, February 9, 2004


18 months ago, we ended up in the Basque territory, Pamplona for the running of the bulls. We were staying in a flat with 5 other Aussies, and one particular Aussie, Will, all he could say was, "There fucked them Spanish" !!!!!

Fast forward

Waking up early on Saturday morning, we jumped in the car and drove out to Stanstead to catch a plane to the Basque territory, Bilbao. We made our way through the customs gates and waited in the lounge. Eventually, we were called to board the plane. We made our way to the second last row and took our seats and waited for the plane to take off. Now normally, when we take these cheap flights, I try to go to sleep during take off and landings. Why? Well, on take off, the plane shakes and it feels like its going to fall apart. On landings, the pilot, normally tries to bounce the plane from one back wheel to the other. Where did they get their fucking licenses, from a pack of Corn Flakes !!!!!! My theory with these flights is, the cheaper it is, the harder these fuckers try to place a skid mark in your underwear !!!! Luckily, I managed to close my eyes and drift off before the flight took off. And then it happened. There was a little bit of commotion behind us, and over the loudspeakers came, "Is there a doctor on board?". No reply. Then the next, "Is there a nurse on board?". Still no response. As there was a problem directly behind me, I stood up and let them know that I was a trained first aider. (Did you ever tell me your my hero, I can hear you all singing) Alas, I was told I wasn't needed at the moment. The problem being, was the old guy directly behind me had collapsed, he went white, his eyes were rolling and they were worried he might stop breathing, so they placed an oxygen mask on him. The captain made the announcement that we were turning around and an ambulance would be waiting for us to take the old fella off. As we started to get closer to the ground, the old guy asks, "Are we in Spain already?" He is then told that he had collapsed and an ambulance would be waiting. Once on the ground, the paramedics boarded the plane did some tests, which the old guy couldn't understand because as far he was concerned, nothing was wrong and he had been asleep and he wasn't going anywhere. My thoughts were, Get a fucking straight jacket !!!!! Well, he left and we took off, and this time I felt the plane shake the shit out of me. We landed, made our way into town and hit the pinchos bars. Drinking all day was great as we didn't have far to go before we found our bed, as we were based in the old part of the city. Well, we tried to go to bed, but in the old parts of the town are where all the bars where these fucking fucked bloody Spanish like to drink. About 2 am in the morning, I couldn't take it any longer. We threw on our clothes and went and joined them. There fucked these Spanish. So a couple of hours sleep, and we hit the town to see the rest of it. As it was morning and these fuckers stay up all night, we managed to have the city to ourselves. We walked, and walked and walked, taking in all the sights, well, mainly the Guggenheim museum. We had driven past the giant hedge puppy back in 98 so we were looking forward to seeing the whole thing. It was pretty cool. Also, where we had driven through to get out of the city, the roads were now closed and a new building development was taking place. Not your usual lets build ourselves some el cheapo housing, these were museums and opera houses. Fuck the people I say !!!!! So we carried on until it was time to catch a bus to go back to the airport. As we were lined up, there was a young English boy in front of us. Now normally, I don't put a label on people, as I have had a shaven head and for many years, i have had long hair, but this guys hair was shaven, peroxide and had black P's or b's or d's. Don't really know actually, but I thought pill head. He was saying to the lady, "I need to get on the fucking plane", and when they asked to see his ticket, he said, "What fucking ticket" !!!!! So he was pointed to the counter to buy one. So we made our way through and were waiting for the plane, when this boy goes up to the girls and says, "I need to get on the fucking plane, let me on". Trouble was, there was no fucking plane, so I was wondering if he had popped some pills but he hadn't, he was just mega pissed. So the plane arrives, and we are watching the people get off, when the young boy goes running up again and says, "Let me through to customs, are you going to let me off of this fucking plane"!!!!! The girls just looked and laughed. Finally, they were going to let us onto the plane, but they took the young boy through first. We all made our way down to the plane and took our seats. Once seated, one of the passengers complained that he had said fuck a couple of times. The head steward, then decided to get the police and remove him from the plane. They came ambling down to get him, and he quite calmly got up, grabbed his bag and started to go with him. Then they started to drag him, so he threw a punch and it was on for young and old. Quite a few fucks were flying about, and then the police dragged him out. Now during all of this, I was saying fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, and a couple of fuck me's for good measure and being the honest citizen I am, I stood up and gave myself a citizens arrest and offered myself to the police as well for all of the abusive language that had been coming out of my mouth. Well the police looked at me and told me to FUCK OFF and sit down. Quite shocked I did. The rest of the flight was uneventful, but those Spanish, they are FUCKED


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