Near-death experiences in Halong Bay
Trip Start
Jul 05, 2008
1
25
30
Trip End
Aug 30, 2008
Halong Bay,
Vietnam
Saturday, August 16, 2008
The first day, we got up excessively early in the morning AGAIN and walked with our ginormous bags to the Handspan office on Ma May (in Hanoi). We ditched our big packs in their storage, and only took what we could carry easily. Then we took a long bus out to Halong City. The drive include the obligatory stop at my cousin's-friend's-brother's handicraft shop worked by "authentic agent orange" victims, but whatever, at least we could use their washrooms! Being on the roads in Vietnam is always interesting anyhow. Notable roadside attractions:
-traffic whizzing by at break-neck speeds
-cows everywhere (I love it!)
-workers in identical uniforms pouring out of factories where they are probably working for The Gap
-live pigs tied to scooters... and apparently one bear, according to Aaron (....?)
-propaganda signage confirming that TRUE PATRIOTS WORK TOGETHER TO ADVANCE OUR NATION (that stuff is potent!)
At the dock there are about 243 other junk boats (http://www.flickr.com/photos/51482812@N00/104423257/), and all the tourists get hearded on by all the different tour companies, and off we go. The boat, as you can see, was very beautiful. Our on-board room was the second-best one we had on the whole trip (more details on room #1 to follow!). Our boat was mostly full of rich European families, which was different from our normal scuzzy crowd of slummy backpackers, but I was happy because this lady is getting too old for a booze cruise. Yes that's right kids, it's time to knuckle down and knit me some sweaters and brew me some tea.
The cruised us out to some caves that had remarkably well-formed steps, which came in handy for the sweaty humidy climb that was required. Nice views of Halong on the way out though. We stayed true to our ghetto ways by purchasing liquor and beer from some lady in a dingy before getting back on board (where drinks are expensive). We were then fed course after course of seafood until we were one dish short of exploding**. It was very good, though I was jealous of Aaron for being at the fun meat-loving table, where the conversation appeared to flow like wine at a Greek wedding. I was stuck at the non-carnivore and half-carnivore table, where the vegetarians and pseudo-vegetarians huddled for warmth, shivering and coughing over gray plates of mash.
Seriously though, there was too much food. After gorging, we rolled out on to the upper deck where we cooked like hams in the sun. We sailed to a beautiful beach where everyone and their eighteen Vietnamese cousins were having an early evening swim. I like to swim, so I was a very happy monkey. I swam in the waves. I swam by the beach. I swam by Aaron and gave him a very sophisticated demonstration of the differences between front crawl in swimming, waterpolo, and synchro. He was ever so impressed. I swam out to the boat... and then I swam into a jellyfish!! Sssssting! Ow! The Jellyfish was as wily as a Scotsman and twice as determined to end my span of days. I screamed and swam away to inspect the damage. He burned me on the leg, and on the bum!! I went to Aaron for sympathy, and got nothing more than laughter and scorn (and offers to get peed on). Then back onto the boat, and of course we were the last ones to get back, which brought on the first of many glare-assaults from the other class. Then came another bonanza from the sea for dinner. Afterwards everyone relaxed up on deck in the dark, watching the lights on the other boats. Aaron drank beer from the dingy-lady and I drank Ghettobrau (rum and coke from dingy-lady). We fell asleep outside, not for the last time. It was very peaceful.
Next came Kayak Day. After a reasonably light breakfast (thank GOD), we checked out from the big boat (of course I had to pay for everything) and took all of our things onto a slightly smaller boat and rode it for an hour between the karsts, then started kayaking. The kayaks were all doubles. Thankfully the guide put the men in the back to do the steering. I say 'thankfully' not because I am inept at steering (we all know I have alot of skills), but because this way probably maintained the peace better :)! Clearly it was a good working situation since Kayak Aarara was faster than any of the other kayaks... and better!!! Kayaking was great, between the karsts and in all of these little lagoons, it was wonderful. The highlight of the trip (SEP http://www.flickr.com/photos/jesse_epstein/177485477/ ). We kayaked for around 4 hours that day, with a break in the middle for lunch and a long nap on the boat during the high sun. On the second run we paddled out to a gorgeous white sand beach at the base of a jungly-karst where we got to swim in the crystal clear, flat water, with no one else around. Sometimes I have no idea what I have done to deserve such things. I must have saved a box of kittens in a runaway shopping cart in a previous life.
After kayaking everyone was covered in an attractive glaze of suntan lotion, sweat, and brine. In this fashion they took us to Sunrise Resort on Cat Ba Island (http://www.visit-mekong.com/sunrise-resort-cat-ba/). You can tell that this isn't the normal sort of dive I stay at. It was a welcome respite. There was a gorgeous beach with waves for jumping about in. There was a classy restaurant with food for eating. There was a big fancy pants hotel room complete with robes for wearing, air-conditioning for cooling, and oceany-sounds for listening. Everyone decided against the optional jungle trek in favor of sitting around and doing a whole lot of nothing. Jungle trek, pffffffffft! Nuts to that. I enjoyed jumping around in the waves, which sometimes got quite large and curly, and pummeled you like an zealous masseuse (not the naughty kind). More cheap-ass drinking on the beach and falling asleep outside, oceanside.
The next day was more of the same and then onto some crazy-fast "hydrofoil" boat which took everyone back to the mainland. I think we were last of our group to get on this boat, too (I am slow). This boat was scary fast, but got us to our destination in one piece, as did the van back to Hanoi. We got into Hanoi late in the evening and left for the airport early in the morning, which meant we landed in China bleary eyed and confused, with bags and bags of skanky laundry that we didn't have time to wash before we left. Ghetto fabulous, that's how we roll.
Closing thoughts on Halong Bay, group tours, and jellyfish cynics:
I was wary of doing a big packagy group tour thing, as I never have before and usually scorn those who do. I STAND CORRECTED. It was a great, great little trip. It was very nice to spend 3 days in bliss-out tranquility without having to really think about anything... seriously, they kind of treat you like children on a field trip: Did you forget anything? Make sure you bring all your belongings with you. You need to wear a hat to protect yourself from the sun. Swimming into jellyfish is unwise. However, the regression to infantalism was a nice change of pace from having to do all that damn thinking. And it came at a very good time in this vacation. I think a break from the madness of it all was past due. Don't get me wrong, I'm lovin it, but I sure didn't plan this trip out to be chill. Sometimes I forget what city I'm in. And on days like today, when I'm too exhausted to clearly remember where I was and what I did only a week ago, I forget what country I'm in. Hint to self: time to end this ramble.
**Disclaimer: I am still a vegetarian. But as some of you may know, I give myself a select number of freebie days per year. Do not pass 'Go', do not collect 100 dollars, do not adhere to a vegetarian diet. Usually these days are: Christmas, Easter, Thanksgiving, and Birthday. I have not cashed-in my self-issued vegetarian-bypass tickets since Chrismas 2005, so I have accumulated quite a few. And I cashed them all in for fresh seafood at Halong Bay, baby!!!
pics from Vietnam (this trip):
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=48559&id=512559754&l=087881106d
pics from Vietnam (2007 trip): WARNING! Much crappier camera in use
http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=1894&id=512559754&l=52f6bc05a6
