Gustav's Penitentiary!!

Trip Start Nov 28, 2010
Trip End Ongoing

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Where I stayed
Mahatu Guest House & Hostel Leticia
Read my review - 2/5 stars

Flag of Colombia  ,
Saturday, February 12, 2011

Brad: So after an epic last night in Cartagena farewelling all our new friends we made it back to the hostel in time to see the sun rise, grab our bags and head to the airport. The next destination was Leticia which is the border town of Colombia and Brazil and where we were planning to set off on the long boat ride down the Amazon river into the heart of Brazil. The flight to Leticia seemed like a vague memory which we both got through in a mostly asleep but partially awake state. Landing in Leticia we checked into the Mahatu hostel which is set on its own little private lake fully equipped with families of ducks and ducklings, turtles and lots of fish. The owner, Gustav, was pretty excited about showing us the ducklings whilst our thoughts were only of an infinitely long sleep. After our introduction to the third family of ducks at the hostel, serious sleep deprivation was setting in and i was thinking how long it would take me to pluck the feathers off the ducklings to make a pillow. 

After some catch up ZZZZ's in the hammocks overlooking the pool we soon were introduced to our new travelling companions, Tobi and Lukas- some friendly German lads who were heading down the Amazon on the same boat as us in a few days time. With some time to kill we soon got to essentials of meeting people from faraway lands and learnt how to swear in a different language. VERFLUCHTE SCHIESSE!!! Google it if you dare. Learning some German card games inevitably followed, and with the addition of the Aussie girls and one token Pom, a few quiet beers had turned into quite the shin dig. Little did we know but the German/Aussie crew that we formed that night would spend the next two weeks together. Things got really interesting when we found out Tobi was an avid rock climber and introduced us to 'Table climbing'. The basic idea is you get a solid table, sit on top of it, and have to get all the way underneath the table and back on top of it again without touching the ground and using as few table edges as possible. It was an instant hit and before long some drunken variations with a much higher degree of difficulty came into play which included 'chair climbing'. It was getting quite late in the night by now and being in the middle of the Amazon the humidity was still pretty high so group of people enthusiastically encouraged by Athena decided to cool of in the pool.Athena soon spotted a kiddies slide like a kid a candy store set to dragging it over for some splish splashing fun. I think this was the final straw as Gustav the owner came storming looking somewhat like a school principal and screaming ĶUT!, OUT! OUT!. YOU MUST ALL GET OUT OF MY HOSTEL NOW!!. Things got pretty heated and i think you could actually see the vein pulsing in his forehead which was actually borderline hilarious. I get the impression that if we all started laughing the guy would have a massive brain hemorrhage on the spot. Most of us took this as the cue to hit the sack but this didn't deter Jono and Tobi who decided to sneak down to the other dormitory to keep the party going. As stealthy as a drunk Aussie and German could be, they snuck down to the girls dorm and were checking windows whilst Lukas and I had a birds eye view of the ensuing chaos comfy in our own beds. With both their eyes glued to the windows, right on cue Gustav burst from his hiding spot and tried to evict them on the spot for disturbing the peace. After many promises to behave themselves the boys were in full retreat back to the dorm beds.It really felt like we were on a school camp than in a hostel as we could see Gustav from our windows patrolling the grounds late into the night.

The next morning we received a lecture from Gustav about this being his house with his rules and that we must abide by them or find ourselves removed from his graces. This reconfirmed the notion that we were in actual fact back at school camp and judging by the nightly foot patrols it was of the military variety. The lecture was made even more funny by the fact Gustav pointed out the people he was most disappointed with. Lukas and myself were named top of the most wanted list with an Laura the English girl taking out third prize for trying to make noodles past the chime of midnight as it was disrespectful to people sleeping. Now as most people know that are reading this i am a virtual angel in a white man's skin so there is an easy explanation for being on Gustav's hit list that Jono and i encounter on an almost daily basis. We are both white, we both have blond hair, similar build and talk the same...therefore we must be twin brothers. Funny none the less It was simply another case of mistaken identity so i am still hoping to get back on Gustav Christmas card but i think it might take awhile. 
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