The incredible weirdness of being falang
Trip Start
May 01, 2002
1
19
64
Trip End
May 01, 2009
Cha-am,
Thailand
Sunday, October 1, 2006
In the beginning, the rich powerful falang meets a poor powerless Thai woman. The falang has taken survival for granted and pursues pleasure and happiness by spending money. She is just trying to survive. He is the one with the money and she is the one that is desperate for some of that money. He is powerful and she is pliant and servile.
Then, time passes, and more time passes, and as time passes, a certain Thai magic begins to work on the falang and one day he gets that eerie feeling that he is hooked on her, that if she left him he would die, but he is in total denial and even dares her to leave, saying, "I am the one with the money"
Happiness
. One day, perhaps after some misunderstandings and certain unpleasant exchanges, she turns cold, or perhaps she goes off to visit her mother or something of that nature. This event takes many forms. Suddenly, she appears to have lost her interest in him and even his money. He suffers a sinking feeling but he says to himself, "fuck off and good riddance and don't come back" and tries to get on with his life but he finds that he cannot sleep wthout her.
His heart flutters a little bit at first but with more intensity and greater frequency as time passes. Then he finds that he can't sleep. He tosses and turns. In the morning, he makes coffee and tries to bury himself in the newspaper to try and go back to his life the pure and simple way that it was before she had come into it.
More time passes and she has not called. He promises himself that he will not call her. Mid morning, with still no call, he breaks his own promise and calls her on the pretext that he just wants to know that she is ok, but she does not answer. He is furious. He paces the floor. He tries denial again and again but he begins to break down. He calls her again and then again but it just rings and rings.
Reality sinks in. Like a drug addict in withdrawal he begins to whimper and he talks rubbish to himself. He is in denial no more and he realizes that he cannot live without her. He might call Soidog to have a beer and talk it over. He talks tough and says "It's for the best, mate" but the Dog can see that he's out of aces by the way he holds his eyes.
Eventually she calls. By then he has melted into a small blob of quivering liquid. He will do anything for her. He is now putty in her hands. The power roles are exactly in reverse. Even his financial power is gone for his life savings are now at her disposal. She asks, he gives, and he gives happily, just happy to have her and her love.
I have seen this story go through from beginning to end in different versions many times in Thailand. No matter how confidently you tell yourself you are not going to fall in love, that this is just an economic arrangement, that it is just for sex, that they are nothing but little brown fucking machines, in the end, you find yourself so madly in love that without her you can neither sleep nor breathe.
.
Even as I type out this story, perhaps a thousand new falangs are unwittingly entering this trap from which there is no escape. The reproduction instinct is the most powerful force on earth and Thai women seem to have the ability to cast that bewitching spell like no other. Be forewarned. Enter at your own risk.
Soidog
Comments
Lesson learned?
And lesson learned? Nah, I don't think so. Not all Thai women are the same. I am Thai and I didn't marry my husband for money. In fact, I make more money than he does!