Saying good bye again..
Trip Start
Jul 01, 2004
1
54
68
Trip End
Ongoing
Pdx,
United States
Saturday, December 16, 2006
Sorry I don't read your blog. I'm just not a blog reader. I spend so much time on the internet as it is, and I am getting more and more fed up with sitting infront of this square hot bit of plastic. I write this for people I never see and have limited contact with. At this poing tho, I don't think many people are reading it. That's ok. I don't expect people to read mine if I don't read theirs. I don't need or want people to comment on these things anyway. Let's just talk in person ok?
I fell in love with this town. Obviously, from my last entry, it was sometime after Sept. DESPITE having lots of problems with people here (as in no one thinks a 30 year old needs a good friend and that they must be hanging out with SOME ONE ELSE) I have come to love this city. There are so many interesting and fun nooks and crannies and things going on. Except for the weather and sometimes lousy transportation system that hides behind the award it received 10 years ago this is a good town to wander around alone. I've ended up spending most of my time alone here and its ok. Now I have to pack all the things I've wanted to do into one and a half months. Because I'm leaving again, but this time for "good". I can't say i'll never be back, but it is unlikely. I suspect I will visit again, it would be hard to stay away. Things just got messy with the job and the house and it was time to go work the fests anyway. And Jonathan and I have gotten back together. So it's back to Canada for me.
It has occurred to me (recently again) how lucky I am. I currently don't have a dabilitating disease. I've never been beat up or shot in the face. I've never moved to a town and not have enough money for food because I couldn't get a job. I've never had any luck with jobs and I haven't had perfect health and I have had a difficult love life these past 3 years or so, but I haven't gone blind and I don't have debt and I haven't been in any serious car wreck. I've moved where I want when I want, I do what I please without any huge explainations or compromises. I've never had a money problem. I have people around me (whether phsyically or mentally) that make me laugh, support me and make me appreciate what I have. There aren't as many as I like, they don't hang out with eachother, but they are there. And they give me excuses to travel :)
I also started thinking that some of this isn't luck, that some of it is choice and thriftiness and use of time. I can give lectures on how to manage your work and leisure time better... and saving money... That's all good but it doesn't explain why I haven't been in a fire or lost a good friend to suicide or had a fucked up scary childhood. That's something else. That's something beyond myself. The only thing I can call it is luck. The universe has been very good to be so far...
My new friend Kelly and I went to Santa Cruz and San Jose in November. it was super fun. I'll be posting a few of my own pics on here. She's got some too:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/curlypurples/sets/7215759438078 7929/show/
and movies as well:
http://s80.photobucket.com/albums/j181/warrior_two/?action=view¤t=MVI_7779.flv
http://s80.photobucket.com/albums/j181/warrior_two/?action=view¤t=MVI_7780.flv
http://s80.photobucket.com/albums/j181/warrior_two/?action=view¤t=MVI_7783.flv
http://s80.photobucket.com/albums/j181/warrior_two/?action=view¤t=MVI_7927.flv
http://s80.photobucket.com/albums/j181/warrior_two/?action=view¤t=MVI_7928.flv
