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Shine On You Crazy Diamonds (Parts V-XI)
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After all the leukemia shit I was in the frame of mind that everything and everyone would seem beautiful...and then I landed in England. The first conversation I heard was a group of ASBO-head kids discussing their preferred locks to pick when they're stealing bikes. I got a train from Gatwick to Watford Junction, sat on my bag, ate a Double Decker and enjoyed being able to listen to conversations in English ("Be careful, mate, she's red 'ot!").
Sophie The Penguin - Amersham?
My ex-girlfriend and travel-penguin
Soph picked me up and took me back to her parents and her cats. We caught up and I basked in the pleasantness of living in the English countryside. Soph herself had only just got back from Africa, which gave her an excuse to subject me to a 1000 photo slideshow eliminating any need for me to ever travel there myself. Ah, but she's still a diamond penguin.
Maggie & John - Digswell
Family friends
Soph was kind enough to drive me to the next 'shire' where I stayed with my parents' best friends. They're what my parents would be like if they were extremely busy, stressed and concerned with identity theft. We chewed the fat about the last few months and they lavished me with luxury.
Patch - Welwyn Garden City
Scriver Cup competitor
I arranged to meet Patch at his house and in true Patch fashion he didn't turn up. He was under the impression that we were supposed to meet down a pub which I hadn't heard of, so after chatting to his parents ("Tell Patrick there's dinner here for him if he wants it.") ventured down for a few lagers with him and a few of the girls I was in 6th form with. Everyone was pretty much the same except Patch was trying to sell me property. We all caught up and they gave me the latest on who is married, pregnant and dead.
I caught a train (also known as a Soduku arena) down to London, hopped on the Tube with all the business people and thanked fuck I'm currently not one of them. But the English seem most at home when they're going to and from work. It's so unoriginial to say that the English love talking about traffic and travel, but England truly revolves around transport and they're obsessed with commuting.
Orla - Central London
Ex-girlfriend and travel-weasel
I went out for some beers with Orla, who is living over in London now. She's in great form and still one of my favourite people in the world, especially now that we've found some sort of equilibrium. We talked about how great we both are and talked alot about our families. She had been crushed to hear about my Dad since they always got on so well...when I broke up with her my Dad had said she was the daughter-in-law he'd always dreamed of. Keep dreaming.
Alex Of The Bush & Lyndsey Of The Bush - Earlsfield
Two of the people I travelled with in the Australian outback
I had some sort of outback reunion with Alex Of The Bush and Lyndsey Of The Bush which was cool. We basically just got pissed and had a good laugh and some deep philosophical discussions like old times. They've both been back living and working in London for a good while so have become fully Londonised - serious and borderline discontent. "London makes me so self-centred," Alex Of The Bush explained, "That's London's problem."
Alex Of The Bush was kind enough to let me crash in his pad for a couple of nights. He said he always imagines his travel mates to still be off having a great time while he's stuck here working. He explained it was a relief to see me so miserable. I knew what he meant...whenever we catch up and he tells me about the girls he is currently dating I'm always delighted to hear they're a fucking disaster.
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