Weary Yes! Determined Yes! Persistent Yes@
Melbourne,
Victoria,
Australia
Sunday, August 31, 2008
Wel;come one and Welcome all to my 12th entry.
Life is an exceptional journey. Some love it, some hate it, most of get frustrated with it. Where as my moods do the old diving and leaping thing my fascination with this whole thing called life that we are caught up in is always there. Life fascinates me, it always has. For as long as I can remember I've always asked myself the question. What is all this about? How did life happen? How did it come about, what was before life?
Are they question that can ever be answered? Do I really care anymore?
Perhaps, perhaps not, whatever the case I'm sure to ask myself them many more times.
A question I have been pondering recently.
How can I, how can we maintain a positive attitude?
Perplexedly I have met a great number of people who see this as a dangerous thing. They actually believe that positivity is unhealthy and unrealistic. Strange but true. Indeed I myself took this on to come extent, in my early twenties when I can safely say I was behaving and thinking in q depressed fashion. Walking round with my neck bent and head low, thinking of all the pain and yukkiness of the world, thinking of all the pain and yukkiness inside my head. Did that create a pretty time for me, generally not, and
I can confidently state that during this period the times when I was happy, I was being physically active and playful, my mind was being creative and sparky.
As I was sat in my garden, feeling the firm wooden bench beneath me, a roughshod plank of wood balanced to support whoever would like to take up that opportunity, my feet were in the green grass and my eyes and mood were upturned as the blue sky opened above our heads. I sat there and thought. Ghandi he reamained positive, Nelson Mandela he reamained Positive, Martin Luther King he took a positive stance, and I asked myself the question how did they do it? The odds were heavily stacked against them, or so many argued, yet they kept their belief. There was one thing they all had in common, they all professed to believe in the essential good nature of man, and that it was always possible to reach this aspect of people and they would respond in a manner of Love and appreciation for all beings. Of course that is my summary of it, I'm sure they would have happenened to have phrased it very differently, and ever so eloquently.
I asked myself this question because I see my positive nature go up, making me high as a kite and full of fervour. Then it can go boom and crash down low so low, that I'm scum useless and dirty. All very dramatic.
How is it possible to remain positive, steadfast positivity.
Let me assert, I do not mean blind positivity, I don't mean calling a spade a diamond, or a kettle a bath, I don't mean calling shit a perfume, or piss amber nectar.
I guess alot of it comes down to belief. What you allow yourself to believe? What do you allow yourself to believe. Do you allow yourself to believe that we can live in a harmonious manner with each other and the planet.
Yes I do. Of course we can.
I'm not calling a spade a diamond. It' quite clear there are people running around killing each ohter, there are children who are stabbing each other, and they're are people poisioning the Earth on an incredibly grand scale.
However I still believe that it is possible for us to work together harmoniously. I beleive it with a passion and I am willing to investigate how that could be possible,
I am willing to learn about people who take steps towards trying to acheieve this, in finding communities and pocketas of people who live and work together harmoniously. And I am determined to find a way to be consistently loving and kind to myself. I beleive this is of extreme importance. Who am I helping when I beat myself up, when I mentally bash myself and shrewdly nit pick myself apart. Who am I helping? Who am I helping. Who does this help? Yes it is useful to isolate where we are going wrong, yes it is good to isolate the mistakes, and to feel the pain of such a mistake, but then, rather than stuffing my head into the ground, hinding my face behind my hair tucking my heart behind my shoulder blades wouldn't it be better to begin to take steps and actions to amend the situations that one sees.
I know that this can be such a challenge that even recognising our faults, whilst simultaneously feeeling the pain that having those things inside us or having done such actions can be too great for us to face....at times like these, people find, cigarettes, booze,,,,books..t.v anything to shut that dialogue out anything to close off the pain. I understand I have done it many many many times over. I've lived that for years. Did it help? Did it help? Did it F*** Occasionally it provided fun or amusement, entertainment or diversion, but sure enough those old chestnuts popped back up over and over again. And if we don't peel those chestnuts and take a good look at them, then we will never be able to eat them and digest them, or for that matter decide to throw it out becasue it's useless, it's gone hard and dead, the life has sucked itself out from it.
I'm back to being patient, and am going to skip the subject entirely. Change the subject and create something new.
When I first attended one of Chris Howards free Seminars a mammoth 38 hours packed into three days, I became extremely hungry to study NLP. I watched in fascination as he wove his stories and I could smell the hypnosis in the air, his consistent mentioning of Eriksonian methods intrigues me hugely. As I have mentioned before Kyle Davies was massively influenced by this guy Milton Erikson, and it was through four 1 hour chats with Kyle that I manged to take charge of my life again. It is my personal beleif that I still have some work to do to completely regain full health. Why? Becasue though I am able to support myself at the moment I still have dizzy speel, sensational headaches that appear when I am in particular peoples company. It's a right pain in the neck and I am determined to live a life free from this, feeling light and free, clear and bright, and when I don't it is simply becasue I have done a lot am I ready for a nap or a quiet chill. I have chosen to believe that NLP will help me in this journey. It is very clear to me, thaat I still spend a large amount of time listening to myself and others and myself engaging in self-sabotage, and indulging in the painful side of life and what could go wrong. I'm very good at listening to the pain. At times that is all I can see, I know I have to make a change only I can't see where that change is. It drives me up the wall. I can be involved in a situation that is casuing me pain for months and months and I put up with it, for various reasons, it is only whent hings hit a real cirses that I actually do something about it. Why do I wait so long?
Say for example one is in a relationship or a job that is damaging ones health, one knows it is making them unhappy, or that this person is stressing them out, but we love that person, or we are in the job that supports our loved ones and leaving either situation could either ruin our friendship with the loved one, or potentially damaged outr ability to economically support ourselves or our friends. I'm sure that sounds familiar, evn if you believe I'm being unclear and vague, which I am and I know this, and it's deliberate because I'm playing, becasue I like to play. Do you like to play? do you like to have fun and enjoy yourself. Do you think it is possible for a human to have fun and play at work. Is this possible? Now that is an interesting question isn't it? Could it be made into one?
I've recently been in very similar situations, currently I'm excited because I'm about to move. I can foresee arriving home and feeling light and free, I can feel the headache that I've been feeling for a couple of months ready to lift.
But that is another story and for other ears.
Through getting caught up in work I put my education on the back burner. My education has been stimulating me so much, giving me so much energy, and passion for living. I spent my time being a more active listener, listening to all the layers of sound in my environment. Layers, the Simpsons has many layers, may layers indeed, and can be viewed in many different ways. Like life can, we all view life in many different ways. One of the other things I was doing a lot was using my eyes with eagerness, tracing lines and curves, feeling colours, seeing clours, seeing textures, cupping my eyes between bursts of reading. speed reading which is awesome and works most effectively in a astate of expanded awareness. There is a huge difference between WORD for WORD SPEED READING and skimming or range reading.. There was a guy named Marco Donatelli. He was born in Italy, his parents were poor and as a boy he worked at the fruit market. Though the young lad couln't read he spent his time staring at the papers that were scattered all about the market. a Kind hearted book seller noticed this and offered the boy a job.
This lovely man taught Marco to read, and before Marco had grasped this skill he had memorised the comoplete layout of the store. He ebgun to be known for haing an exceptional memory. At one point some crafty chap left him a large manuscript for two weeks, a year later he came back and said "Look here mate I lost that manuscript and I really need the information that was in it, can you remember anything that was written there" Our remarkable Marco, then dictated word fro word and Punctuation by Punctuation mark. THE ENTIRE MANUSCRIPT. Throughout the rest of his life he continued to develop his reading art and up to the age of 83 he would set one or two books per night to memory, all of whioch he could recall with perfect ACCURACY. Mr Marco Donatelli is not the only man to have achieved this. Nor is he the only man with a skill that he continuously developed over the years/
I was recently at a Seminar and one of the favourite quote of the day was that Einstein said if you study one thing for 15 minutwes a day then you'll become a master at it, and if you study one thing for 15 minutes a day for 5 years you'll be a genius. I won't bother with quotations marks because it is probably wildy incorrect. You can guess the question then asked.
What would you study for fifteen minutes a day if you knew it would have a profound impact on your life? It would wouldn't it? It could make a huge difference couldn't it.
So yes before I got caught up in my current job, which has eased off now, I was studying the MIND and how a certain number of people believe that it works. Showing expamples of how it has worked in certain people.
During this period, NLP kept cropping up.
My news today is I have decided to do the training. In fact my traing has begun. For me this is hugely exciting, it has already had a huge impact on my life, and I can taste the wonderful learnings about to come. I'm over the moon that I am going to be learning some wonderful hpynosis techniques. I love language, I find languasge fascinating, and I already know that hypnosis is used hugely in everyday conversation. Have you ever felt like someone has put you in a trance, have you ever let some put you in a bit of a trance through listeneing or half listening to what there saying. Perhaps you know what I mean, and if you did know what I mean then you'd know what I mean wouldn't you, just a little bit, you might feel it just a little bit like the waves on the sea brushing the letters away like the sounds of the waves receding in your mind, receding and coming abck in and receding a bit, you might just be able to imaagine just a little bit that hypnotic language has been utiliased by yourself or your frineds before. Probably unwittingly but most certainly. Is that possible?
I'll be learing all sorts of fascinating things about language patterns, levels of abstraction, physiology, tone and timbre of voice, developing sensory acuity, that is learning to rapidly digest a lot more information about the other's physiology than I currently do. ooh it's going to be exciting!!
I'vve been thrown what I consider a lifeline, both with the opportunity to do the course and also with the opportuniy to extend my Visa. I'm off to visit an Organic farmer over the weekend, he's a lovely chap and I should be able to top up my seassonal work adequately enough to apply for a 12 month extension.
Why is this extension important to me? I made a promise to myself in england. I made it to myself before my mind realised what I had done. That decision was that I wouldn't return back to england until I knew I could sustain myself financially in a manner that far exceeded the economic life I was living and had lived up until then. I knew that this would mean different attitudes, new skills, and a willingness to grow and try new things out. Tied inextricably to this was that I would start using my skills in a much more active manner I even went so far as to say I would play a higher statu. I recognised how often I played low status, with my thoughts with other people, with my posture. I determined to make a change.
Have you ever climbed a mountain? You know when you think you can see the peak, only to get ot it and realise you have to go down someway again. Sometimes this happens over and over, and you realise, cracking hell I'm tired. Yup I've been through a few of those, but I'm determined, and I'm being persistent. Persistent in my learnings, and showing up,placing effort in.
Paradoxically one of my huge lessons is to learn to relax more, let things go more, being reminded to loosen that tight grip is actually beneficial.
I was at a seminar recently being run by a guy called Jacl Deloasa. He is creating a name for himself as the yougest Peak
Performace Caoch in australia. the guy was only 22 and he's a dude. One of the first things he said as he marched across the stage.
Forget Knowledge being POWER, he siad we all have the knowledge, we all know that to be healthy one has to eat less and exercise more, that to make money one has to save money, yet obesit is massive and constantly growing, Australia has the largest amount of people living in Debt. He stressed and stressed we have the knowledge but we're not using it. HIS ZEAL was about UTILISING information. taking ACTION.
I leave you with that as I take the ACTION to step out into the SUN, Wahoo it's the first day of spring. Soon I won't be able to see clouds as I breathe at night. Oh yes folks it has been CHILLY here, but once again it's set to warm up. I hope you have all managed to do something wonderful in your summer season
Wishing you well
Smiles
