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Another day or two
Entry 14 of 30 | show all | print this entry |
The Kosovo posse is split up now, most of them are heading to budapest, but I've had my fill of budapest, so I'm going to chill here for a day or two to hang out with my friend Slaven then head to Romania. Really sucks to split away from them all, it was such a great time.
Other than the women, there aren't many sights to see. At the far end of town there is a park/museum/ruins/fort area called Kalemagdon. There is a nice view of the Danube and some interesting old fortress ruins. There is also a military history museum. It was mostly boring stuff, people fought, people died, land was conquered- typical museum. Towards the end I was speeding through it, finally I get to the end and go to retrieve my coat and bag from the cloak room. But the lady wouldn't give it to me, she just said there one last exhibit. I really wasn't interested at this point, but I if it made the lady give my stuff back then whatever.
As I walk in, I notice its more modern than any other exhibit. Then I realize it's Serbia's most recent chapter in war history. Right in the middle is a US soldier's uniform, the caption reads, "A US soldier's uniform- captured in 1999." Wow! This guy was nearly my age! There were also pieces of US planes shot down, including a stealth. I'm feeling a bit unsettled by all of this, maybe even a bit angry. Then I notice some pictures, pictures of bombed buildings and people with bloody, severe injuries, from american bombs of course. Now I'm feeling a bit unsettled, but in a slightly different way. I've been to tons of war museums, mostly the same stuff, weapons and people dying, history being made. But this was so incredibly different, I'm seeing histroy that was created by my country, by people my age. And now its all so clear- why some people don't really like the good ole US of A. Maybe we were justified to commit this act, maybe we weren't. Maybe the Serbs were justified in their acts, maybe they weren't. But who really cares about justification when there are buildings blown to pieces and dead people in the streets and the pavement around them covered in dark, red blood. All of a sudden I am thinking about things from a completely different point of view- what if I had been born in Serbia instead of the US, if I had been in highschool during this time, if I had nothing to do with the reason why Serbia was being bombed. I would have had nothing to do with it, but still I would have the fear that a bomb might fall on my house or on my family, or on my friends, or on my school and there is nothing I can do about it. Then I think of my friend Slaven, who the night before I had shared several beers with, while watching a soccer game. He is about my age and he was a school student during this time, he did have all of this to contend with. And I just think and think, and I really don't know how to feel about it all. I am completely dumbfounded but I'm unable to leave the thought be. My brain and emotions are just processing away but I just can't sum it all up. Finally I remember something that Slaven had said the night before during a related conversation. I remember it as clear as can be, "War is shit, its just shit." Well put.
Finally I am back to consciousness, but now I have to walk out of his musem and up to the lady who has my bag. It was ackward, very ackward. I'm not sure what kind of emotion my face was giving off, but I know it was noticeable. The entire walk home my mind didn't stray far for these thoughts.
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