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What do you mean you want the van back?
Entry 24 of 36 | show all | print this entry |
Hello from Forster in pleasant New South Wales.
Since our last blog we've been travelling along the coast of Victoria and New South Wales. It does look a lot like Wales and is very picturesque. They have a long history of whaling here so we took a look at a killer whale museum. We learnt two interesting facts there, which were:
1. Did you know that the only totally voluntary co-operation between wild animals and man used to happen here in the 1800's? Wild Killer Whales used to herd big Blue Whales into shore where the whalers killed them. In return the meat loving Killers got to munch the yummy tongue of the Blue Whale and once they'd finished the whalers took the rest. This beautiful relationship between a man and his whale only ended when the humans overfished and killed all the Blue Whales and then killed one of the Killer Whales too. Sadly mankind destroying the delicate balance of nature has been a theme in every museum we've visited in Oz.
2. Despite it's multi billion dollar budget N.A.S.A. can't find a better lubricant for the space shuttle than the oil from whales brains. Although everything else formerly made from whale bits can be made from other things the future of space travel still depends upon having enough whale-based WD40. Fascinating places, whale museums.
So, as we made our way up the coast it was all going swimmingly. We planned to cross the Sydney Harbour Bridge, explore the coast, reach the Whitsunday islands and then return Ringo to Brisbane. From there we planned to fly to Sydney, have a few days in the big city and then fly off to New Zealand.
The first part went o.k. We did cross the bridge (we hope to climb over it when we come back to Sydney) and reached Newcastle, just a bit further north. We chilled in the open air baths and got a list of 'must do' things in the area from a local. As we reached Forster we planned to have a bbq on the coast (the mega friendly butcher told us a good place to camp and even offered to lend us his house, which he rents out but is currently unoccupied. Friendly types the Aussies) and watch the sun set with a bottle of wine. But before we did we thought it best to check our e-mails. I opened mine and found one from a firm called 'Wicked.com'.
'Wicked.com' are the owners of our campervan. When we hired it we planned to go north, travel through the centre and then go back up to Cairns in the tropical north of Queensland. Our route has changed more often than Rod Stewart has changed his blonde and we now didn't plan to go all the way up to Cairns. We also wanted to keep Ringo a bit longer, until about the 27th of January. I always knew that our plans were fluid (by that I mean that we didn't really have any) when we picked him up so I asked the nice lady "If we change our plans can we drop our van off somewhere else, or keep it longer?" She smiled and replied "No problem! Just let us know what you need and we'll sort it out! No worries!" I had e-mailed our new requirements to Wicked.com and I expected the e-mail to confirm that holding on to our van wouldn't be a problem.
Sadly that's not what it said. The cheery "No problem! Just let us know what you need and we'll sort it out! No worries!" had been replaced by "We're fully booked in Cairns and your van is going out the same day. So we'll see you at 10 a.m. on Jan the 16th, thank you very much". Oh dear.
Suddenly our beachside bbq was out of the window to be replaced by frantic calculations and reading of maps. just to add insult to injury a comedy map thief had obviously swapped all of our maps for joke ones, as Cairns surely couldn't be as far away as it looked. To our growing horror we realised that, yes, it was that far away (2,500kms or about 1,600 of your English miles) and, yes, we had to be there in THREE DAYS. 'Oh dear' quickly turned to 'Oh s*it'. So, if we were to make it in time, we had to find the answer to the following question:
Q. If two travellers suddenly find that they need to travel 1,600 miles at a top speed of 56 m.p.h. on non-motorway roads through lots of towns, and thay can't drive at night in case they run over a Kangeroo, how long will it take them to reach their destination?
A. Never mind any of that, let's just jump into the van and drive! Aaaaaaahhhhh!
So will we make it? Keep reading our blog to find out! Have to dash, the highway north awaits!
Richard and Elaine
P.S. If a seemingly friendly Australian woman ever answers a question you ask of her by saying the fatal words "No Problem! Just let us know what you need and we'll sort it out! No worries!"
NEVER, EVER, BELIEVE HER.
Latest Comments (3)
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Re: Jimmy's arrest... (reply)
Jan 18, 2007 06:56 EST by sconkling
hells - odd name for someone called David. Perhaps you are in disguise and this way no-one will recognise you.
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In reply to:
Or did you know anything about it? hmmm...
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Incorrect Answer (reply)
Jan 16, 2007 11:45 EST by sconkling
Richard
Your answer to your own question is incorrect. I calculate driving 1600 miles at 56 miles per hour means 29 hours worth of driving. In three days this is possible with 10 hours per day. Realistically you will achieve about 40 miles per hour and so this will mean about 14 hours per day.
I conclude the best possible solution to this conudrum would be to 'do a David' and abandon the v... show all
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3 votes 
