The Bangkok Hilton
Trip Start
Nov 12, 2008
1
13
49
Trip End
Apr 30, 2009
Bangkok,
Thailand
Friday, December 26, 2008
I have joined Raza and Rich for 11 days of fun and frolicks, (for those of you guessing who this it's Shah). After an 11 hour flight where i slept like a baby as it was over night i woke up fresh as a daisy in Bangkok. I said my good byes to my travel companians for the past 11 hours who happened to be 2 young English chaps dressed from head to toe in Lacoste and Reebok no doubt bought from the closest JJB sports, who were sporting rather fetching british bulldog tatoos and Union Jack flags on thier arms. I think "good bye fellas have a good trip" was the longest conversation i had with them- although i did snigger when i saw him filling in his visa and under "British" the poor chap wrote "ENglISh" in a mixture of upper and lower case, so i helped him fill it in. For those who know me well , reaching Bangkok on my own was a feat in itself ( i live a very sheltered life) i made friends with 2 guys in the airport in true "traveller" style and made my way to the hotel.
In true Raza fashion himself and Rich turned up 1.5 hours late. After a few handshakes and shoulder to shoulder hugs we got ready to go out. First things first, i got measured up for a few suits and used my ferocious hagglin skills to bag myself a bargain, so 3 suits and 7 shirt later we made our way back to the hotel to get ready to go out. I would love to say the first night was amazing, and we were up till the early morn, but all 3 of us were tired so we back in bed by 2am ( 7pm UK time).
Last night however is a different story, the night started off tame. Walking through the streets of Bangkok we came across a converted Van - it was now a bar, we sat down and drank a bucket of methylated spirit and coke, before we knew it we were joined by a local construction worker who we christined "skag bobby" for his obvious addiction to skag- we were introduced to his manager- who i wanted to have words with about the hazards of employing a skag head as a labourer but didn't because i was scared of skag Bobby. Skag Bobby proceeded to shake our hands every 7 minutes and and play air guitar to songs that did not have a guitar in them and make up his own lyrics to various songs by Guns and Roses, Dire Straits and Europe's "The final countdown".
After we downed our drinks - i poured half of mine on the ground behind me. Richard was in awe and giving me "nuff respect" for downing the drinks but pakistani Poirot saw the damp patch behind my chair and slices of lime and knew i had poured it away.
After a walk of shame and 2 tuk tuk journeys later we arrived at a club- this club in Bangkok managed to attract London's finest selection of rude boys-it wasn't long before Raza's penchant for champagned reignited-in fact i would guestimate within 30 seconds of my arrivial. So a bottle of Bubbly (which costs 4 times what it does in London) and various spirits later, we stumbled home. Richard kindly introduced me to the contents of his stomach. 7 hours later i needed the fix that only a greasey cheeseburger could give.
We went along Khoa San Road where every cliche traveller and his brother was resting, i must have seen at least 14 people having their hair braided - i want to kill them. Every traveller here insists on carrying a book with them ( to obviously show off thier intellect) but i have not seen one being read yet.
There is more tie and dye trousers and t shirts here than in an African steel band's uniform. Rich and Raza much to my disgust have become accustomed travellers- i say long live the city and capitalism.
I must bid you farewell as the very thing to bought me here (cheeseburger) now is going to take me away- where is that toilet??
Farewell
Shah
Comments
Be All You Can Be
Shah, this trip was supposed to make a man of you! How can you pour that stuff away? shameful.
Will you be visiting your old lady friend from your last time in the city? I am sure she would love to see you again...