Things to do in Santorini the day your mom dies

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  Santorini, Greece
Saturday, May 17, 2008

1. Forward the news to the people you think would want to know.

2. Go to a cafe called Vertigo, order a cup of thick Greek coffee and try to read.

3. Abandon the book, the cafe and swarms of cruise passengers clogging the streets of Fira. It is much too depressing to watch them pick through the souvenirs and snap each other's pictures.

4. Board a bus to the southern coastal town of Akrotiri and spend a half hour passing through the wine country of Thira, past the stone ruins of windmills, past signs pointing to villages that say "Traditional Settlings." Listen to American college girls talk about sailing on a yacht chartered by Hollywood junior bigwigs.

5. Get off the bus in front of a beach-side taverna in Akrotiri, formerly a fishing village, now a simulacrum of same. Order a tall draft Mythos and watch the sea, where distant islands seem to drift in the air above the blue horizon.

6. Listen to the tourists. Listen to the waves. Repeat.

7. Walk west along the beach past more bars and restaurants to a headland of red volcanic rock. Look down at the umbrellas and bathers on Red Beach, a pebbled crescent below; red pumice licked by the blue sea.

8.Return to the taverna at Akrotiri for another icy mug of beer and an hour's wait for the next bus back to Fira. Stare at the water until it is indistinguishable from the sky.

9. Board the bus and look out the window at the vineyards, at distant Santorini and Ia which look like a splatter of white bird droppings on the crest of the caldera.

10. Walk back through the clotted streets along the cliff's edge to an Internet cafe. Order a mojito and type these words while Leonard Cohen's "Suzanne" plays in the background.

11. Then return to your room and pour the first generous measure of ice cold ouzo, adding a few drops of water to create a white storm in the clear glass.