The Full Monty

Trip Start ??? ??, 2002
Trip End Ongoing

Loading Map
Map your own trip!
Show trip route
Hide lines

Flag of Spain  ,
Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Holidaying with Escapades - an 18-30 type group - provided delightful opportunities.  On the first morning of his holiday Pedro dragged himself from a two hour slumber to go to the hotel lobby and hear what the large, annoyingly smiley rep had to sell.  Paying seventy euros for a few nights of fun did not seem like a good idea to Pedro, but when he discovered that the party tour group consisted of 80% scantily clad, drunken girls, he skipped up stairs, twirled the safe open and bounced back to the lobby signing over his cash for Escapades adventures.

The opening night Pedro strutted through Gran Canaria like a Hollywood star.  He may not be Brad Pitt, but surrounded by a posse of women he sure did feel like him.  Guys whistled at the girls pouring over the streets of Gran Canaria, and,  in a hero worship sort of way, shook the hand of Pedro and his friends who had by the grace of God signed up for a week long tour with more girls than Hugh Heffner brings to a party (although not one of them compared to his lady friends). Crawling around the pubs (figuratively and literally), Pedro was greeted with a shot of tequila on entry.  Washing the taste of tequila away with vodka seemed to Pedro like a bright idea.  As the night wore on the Escapades reps wanted a return from the group.  Having filled there stomachs with a free bar, they wanted to be entertained by their eager to please group.  Selecting guys at random they were forced onto the stage.  Unreserved as ever, Pedro offered his services free of force.  Unknowing of what awaited him, Pedro did not care.  He grasped his chance to shine in front of a female audience.

As the music began, the familiar movie sounds from the Full Monty filled the air.  Clicking into place the boys looked at each other panic-stricken as the ladies bayed for bare flesh.  They knew they had been put on this stage to show the ladies all they have got.  Nothing was to be left to the imagination.

Choreographed by the overweight lady rep, the boys swayed from side to side, thrusting their hips on cue and slowly removing each item of clothing.  Stripping down to their underwear the boys became less and less inhibited.  Especially Pedro, standing in his pearly white y-fronts, showing the ladies exactly what he had to offer.  Not one to be prudish, Pedro spun around, whipped off the y-fronts and wooed the ladies with his milky white behind.  "Full Frontal" one girl shouted, and not to disappoint, Pedro spun back around to reveal his jewels to the paparazzi girls, taking a holiday souvenir on their mobiles.  Pedro gleefully smiled.  His Full Monty show gave him a few minutes of stardom.

Famous or infamous, Pedro was not sure, but he knew  he had shined and that this night he had the chance to end his journey for poontang.  Spying out prey, Pedro found a semi-lucid Scottish girl dancing upon a pole.  He looked up into her drunken eyes and after a brief romantic pole dance took her home to have his wicked way.

The next morning Pedro awoke to discover a burning sensation on the inside of both legs (a result of persuading the girl with the shaven haven to do all the work).  The girl beside him was not quite as pretty as before.  In fact she was not pretty in the slightest.  As he began to creep away the girl awoke and not to disappoint, Pedro had one last bout of passion with the girl who was only pretty with tequila shots.

Pedro thought he had escaped her clutches forever, until walking out of her door to find that her apartment complex was his apartment complex.  On their next meeting Pedro used his infamous 'I have something in my eyes, so cannot see you' move and ran out of sight.  Not surprisingly, Pedro never had to escape this girl's clutches ever again. 
Slideshow Report as Spam
  • Your comment has been posted. Click here or reload this page to see it below.

  • Please enter a comment.
  • Please provide your name.
  • Please avoid using symbols in your name.
  • This name is a bit long. Please shorten it, or avoid special characters.
  • Please enter your email address to receive notification
  • Please enter a valid email address

Use this image in your site

Copy and paste this html: