Day 134-140: Sydney (Week 15)
Trip Start
Sep 12, 2004
1
26
57
Trip End
Jan 05, 2006
Sydney,
Australia
Monday, January 31, 2005
Early shifts this week...eurgh! But at least it means I get to go home at 3.45...well I would if I actually remembered to go home. For some reason I managed to forget and it wasn't until 4.15 that I realised I should have left already, think I was still in last week mode waiting for 5pm to roll round, won't be making that mistake again.
Walked home and sweated like a pig coz it was so muggy and humid. Felt knackered so had a little mini-nap before jogging to the gym just before 6 for the 6.30 Combat class. David didn't mention anything about an audition or having spoken to Gabby, in fact he didn't even acknowledge me so I think my Combat career in Sydney is gonna be very unlikely as Fitness First seem to have the monopoly and there's only a couple of other clubs in the city centre who run it. I guess I might be able to find something if I was prepared to travel but it wouldn't be worth it for the money...ah well, never know, might be able to do something elsewhere.
Went to Woolies after work to get some bits and bobs for the week, bus home and had a little bit of dinner, just some rice left over from last night. Niki was already in and was watching the Australian Open tennis on the telly....yawn! Asked if she wouldn't mind me watching Queer As Folk at 10, got a lecture about how she's hardly ever here to watch telly, pointed out it's the only thing I like to watch each week and that she's got a TV in her room (she recently bought a bigger TV for the lounge so the little one went in her room), and her response was that she didn't buy the big TV for me and she shouldn't have to go to her room to watch stuff....fucking woman! Whenever I ask for anything it has to turn into a bloody lecture, she said she would go to her room but in the end 'forgot' and frankly I couldn't be arsed to bring it up again. I mean how hard would it be....she's so bloody selfish sometimes and always wants to get her own way, certainly won't miss her when I go. It's her birthday this week and she's invited me to birthday drinks tomorrow night but frankly I dunno if I can be bothered....think I'm only gonna go if Al goes with me coz I don't know any of her friends, and even then I'm not gonna stay long.
Tuesday:
Can't remember anything of note occuring at work. Finished at the right time today and went to Bond St gym.....20 min cycle, 10 min step, 10 min run and then worked on my legs for about 30 mins. Went in the steamroom for a bit and was home by about half 6. Called Al to see what time he was gonna come over, he said about 8. It's was Niki's birthday drinks tonight, a couple of her friends were over whilst she was getting ready. I jumped in the shower whilst Al was on his way over, there was no rush anyway as Niki still hadn't left by 8.30 tho she said the drinks were starting at 8, I guess she can be late to her own birthday drinks.
Finished getting ready while Al was hanging around, decided we wouldn't go straight to Niki's drinks as she would have only just arrived so drove to the Light Brigade bar in Paddington. Al had been invited by a friend who was there for someone else's birthday drinks. It was an old work friend called Dannii and there were loads of people there for the drinks and the bar was pretty packed too. It was all very very trendy with lots of beautiful people, probably particularly busy because it's Australia Day tomorrow so most people have got the day off. Al introduced me as his 'mate' this time, and when asked how or when we met he kinda skirted around the issue, which immediately got my back up a little coz it makes me feel as if he's slightly ashamed. We hung around there for a little while and Al needed to get some money so we wandered to an ATM.
Stopped in a supposed 'traditional English pub' - can't remember what the name is now, tho it looked more like a Wetherspoons but maybe that is traditional english now. We stopped there for a couple as it was less busy and easier to talk. Wandered back the the Light Brigade just before 11, everyone was still around and just chatted to a couple of friends. As usual I climbed into my shell around new people, though I did chat a bit more toward the end of the evening but was still in a bit of a mood and there was a distinct lack of affection from Al. The bar closed at 12, I think it's the first time I've been in a bar when it closes, hardly anything shuts that early!
Al took his friend home which was quite a drive over to the inner west, on the way from his friends he kept asking me if I was ok, initially I just said I was tired but eventually told him how I felt about him being afraid to admit how we met, and how he turns his affections on and off depending on who's around. I suddenly noticed that he was driving back toward my place so asked him if he was taking me home, turns out he thought we were staying at mine after the conversation we had at the weekend about giving my place a go. I hadn't expected him to stay and even had my overnight bag with me so have no idea why he thought we were gonna stay there...so he turned back and we went back to his.
Despite both being pretty tired he put a video on when we got home, it all seemed a bit awkward, there wasn't much conversation. A few minutes into the film he asked me if I liked the movie, I said that it was ok but I couldn't watch all of it coz I was too tired, "Go to bed then" was his reply....so I did, alone....again. After being in bed for about 10 mins I could still hear the TV going, he hadn't turned it down so I guessed he'd fallen asleep, I got up to turn it and the lounge light off (the bedroom door stays open so the TV can be heard easily and the lounge light shines into the room). Turning the TV off woke him up so after I'd turned the light off and went back to bed he followed a few mins after, getting into bed fully clothed....(!).
Well as you can imagine all sorts of crap was running through my head by now, the main thought was that being with someone was supposed to make you happy, but right there and then it was the last thing I was feeling. Basically felt that I couldn't go on trying to make it work, there were too many things which were too difficult to put up with and I just couldn't do it anymore. Decided to sleep on it and see how I felt in the morning.....tho took ages to get to sleep too.
Wednesday - Australia Day:
Woke up on and off during the morning, partly due to a bastard dog barking. Didn't feel much better about things tho, Al was still in bed, still fully clothed! Tried to get back to sleep and managed the odd half hour but by 10.30 I was just too awake. I'd mulled things over and had decided I would see how today went before making a decision to call it quits, see how he was to me during the day. Got up and had a shower and got dressed, by this point Al had woken and gotten up. Things seemed slightly awkward but as usual he was almost carrying on as if nothing had happened, I decided I would try and be all chirpy and not dwell on the night before. I made myself breakfast whilst he had a shower, muffin and scrambled eggs, very nice if I say so myself...Al had eaten a ton of crap last night so wasn't interested.
He asked what I wanted to do today...at this point last night still hadn't been discussed...I said that I wanted to go to the harbour coz there's quite a lot going on down there, they'll be loads of boats out and about and I haven't seen the harbour on a special occasion yet. So we left for the harbour about 12, on route he wanted to put some washing into the laundrette so we dropped that off and whilst that was washing he drove to a park and we went for a wander. Whilst wandering around the park he said to me "Paul, I think we're better off as mates".....I guess I wasn't surprised after last nights behaviour, and I guess I didn't disagree either, it's likely if he hadn't said anything I would have eventually. We had a longish chat about things, there are various reasons why it won't work out, I don't want to be with someone who seems to be slightly ashamed of who he is, he covered it by saying that it depends on how close he is to someone as to how much he tells them about his personal life. I brought up how he skirts around the issue of us and how we met, including last night, he said that it's none of their business, I pointed out that during the evening he asked his friend if she'd been dating or seeing anyone and that he expected an honest answer from her, so why didn't he do the same. I can't go over everything that won't work, he has issues and I'm not perfect either....I told him that it may take a few days to get used to the idea of things changing, but I do genuinely think we can be friends, I mean we've only been dating for a month so it's hardly gotten so far that to change the relationship now would be that difficult.
The mood definately lifted after the chat, he seemed more relaxed so it was obviously something that had been playing on his mind. After picking up the laundry we dropped it back at his place, I waited in the car...he seemed to be gone for ages and I wondered what he was doing, he came back with a cooler bag full of food and drinks for a picnic....and it's stuff like that, thoughtful stuff, considerate stuff, that I like him for. We drove down to Lavendar Bay which is the bay next to Luna Park and wandered from the bay down to the bridge via the park. Obviously there were plenty of people around down by the harbour, families and friends having picnics on every piece of available grass, it was a really good atmosphere. We'd missed the ferry race on the harbour but there were still plenty of boats around. We chilled in the small park under the northern bridge pylon, chatting more, taking pics...it was fun and a million times more relaxed than last night.
At 2pm there was a very brief flyover of 3 air force planes, not quite sure why, nothing spectacular like the red arrows, bit of a damp squib really. Then a navy helicopter flew in and hovered on the other side of the harbour, someone told us that it was a search and rescue demonstration but it was too far away for us to see....after a few minutes it flew over to the small bay right next to the park we were in and they done the same demo over there, unfortunately my bloody camera batteries died and for some reason the second set weren't charged either...bollocks! Ah well, had got some nice pics whilst we were in the park, some nice ones of me and Al, Al took a few of me too, so will get them online eventually.
We wandered back to the car, jogging up a huge flight of steps for some stupid reason, and it wasn't the weather for doing that, it was pretty hot but being around the harbour is nice coz there's usually a cooling breeze coming off the water. Al drove up north to a place called Chatswood, we'd been before, there's a big shopping centre there so we wandered around, got something to eat and drink. Whilst we were there Carlos called to see what I was up to, unfortunately I was nowhere near him so we couldn't do anything, but decided we'd hook up over the weekend, and it sounded as if his 'relationship' had gone off the boil too. Decided to go see a film but couldn't find anything on that we were both interested in seeing so Al suggested we go to the cinema Hornsby, another northern suburb about 20 mins away. Couldn't find anything to watch there either! There's not many good films around at the mo. So we made our way back toward the city, Al taking the more scenic route through some of the affluent northern suburbs, lots of very big houses and lots of money.
I wanted to go to the beach and have something to eat as I hadn't had a proper meal all day so we went to Bondi, took ages to find somewhere to park, as you can imagine the place was pretty busy. Once we'd found a spot we wandered down to the beach and along the front looking for somewhere to eat. En route Al found one of his favourite $10 CD places and spent about 90 bucks, though he did buy a couple of CDs which I liked so I could hear them in the car - our musical tastes are slightly different, him preferring trance and harder dance music to me, though we have some shared likes too. Ended up having dinner at the Hog's Breath Cafe...yes, sounds delightful! Actually the food wasn't too bad and Al worked in one of them when he was younger, by now it was about 9pm but still nice and warm and perfect weather for sitting outside and eating. I was very good and had a chicken salad, even had the dressing on the side so I could put on how much I wanted without it being smothered.
Think we left Bondi about 10 and drove back to the city, I was getting tired but still didn't really wanna go home, Al wasn't tired either so he drove down to a lookout at Rushcutter's Bay. I hadn't been before even though it's only about a 30 min walk from my place. There was a great view of the harbour and it was really peaceful, just a few people milling around taking in the view. We stayed in the car, music on, chatting. It was one of those easy moments where you didn't have to make any effort, it was so easy, I really do enjoy his company, and he said that he really likes hanging out with me too coz he doesn't really have many friends who are happy to just hang out, chat, do something more than just go out drinking. By 11.30 tho I was knackered so he drove me home, we parted with a hug and he said "We're good yeah?" - I told him I just needed a few days to get my head round things but that I didn't want things to change as far as us hanging out and being friends goes.
We'd just spent the whole day together and in that time I think we'd managed to sort out quite a lot, being honest I do still want more than friendship, so that's what I've gotta work through in the next few days, but even in the time we'd spent together today I'd already begun to get used to us just as friends....there's no way I want to lose his friendship and I know he feels the same, deep down he's a good guy and you don't find many of them around.
Thursday:
Back to work, having a bank hol in the middle of the week is weird, it so felt like a sunday yesteday, which means 2 Mondays in the week too!! Booo! Slept really well but did not wanna get up. Discovered at work that all the contractors were going to have their contracts reduced to finish on the Feb 18th!! I'd heard that this was happening to one guy the other day but didn't think it was gonna be everyone, some of the contractors are going permanent and there are 3 new people starting on Feb 14th so they're keeping the non-perm contractors on for that week to help train up the newies and then dumping us, think there's 4 of us affected. They haven't even told us formally, so far it's all hearsay and rumour so I spoke to the manager who confirmed it, however even the manager is being dumped (he's a contractor too) but he's going tomorrow! This is a strange organisation, it's all bit cheeky but unfortunately I think they can get rid of contractors at a weeks notice - that's part of the contract. I'm supposed to be meeting with my agency rep tomorrow so I'll find out from him where I stand coz the last contract I signed was up to the 28th Feb. Effectively I'm losing a week but that would pay for a months rent!
However on the other side I'm looking forward to time off again, this whole working thing is boring, the money is lovely but the 9-5 routine is dull - don't know whether I can go back to it on a permanent basis, guess one day I may not have the choice. Definately don't think I'll bother looking for anything else in Sydney. Now Al and I are just friends I'll probably leave Sydney after the easter weekend which is right at the end of March, so that only leaves 6 weeks between finishing work and leaving....maybe I can get some more work through the casting agency that would be better coz it's flexible...of course there's always the question of when they're actually gonna pay me!
The rest of the working day passed uneventfully. Went to the gym after work, 20 min cycle, 15 min run, 10 min step, then spent about 45 mins working on upper body. Didn't do everything I wanted to do coz it's so busy and I didn't have time to wait for particular machines because I had choir at 7. Was home about half 6 so had enough time to wolf down some tinned spag with meatballs...mmmmm, nutritious! Choir was busy, more and more people seem to be appearing, but you can only be a part of the concert if you've attended at least 80% of rehearsals since the beginning of December, which is good coz at least it means people can't roll up after xmas and expect to take part. Done some more choralography (apparently that's the term for choir movement), god it's gonna be sooo embarrasing, at the mo we've got all the movements in one song, so we don't move for most of the concert then suddenly we're animated for the Judy Garland medley! lol.....Also discovered that Mark Trevorrow isn't gonna be at the concert, the only one I've heard of! Bugger, was looking forward to that. Uniform was also discussed...black Bonds t-shirts and black trousers for first half, long sleeve black shirt with the purple SGLC waistcoat second half, of course we've got to supply the wardrobe other than the waistcoat so I gotta go shopping.
After choir went to The Oxford for a drink, a few people went but I mainly wanted to chat with King and Chris and update them on my 'love' life. When we were the last 3 left I got it all off my chest, very theraputic to talk to someone about what had happened and what was going through my head, also good to get their point of view too...King's older and wiser (early 40s) so he's had a lot of experience when it comes to crappy relationships! We stayed chatting and drinking til just after midnight when I had to give up and go home.
Friday:
Nice quietish day at work with nothing much to report. After work went into town and got my hair cut at Gowing's Barbers again, $15 and takes about 10 minutes, and they don't do a bad job. Always end up with some 50 odd year old italian woman, not exactly the sort of person you'd expect to be cutting hair in a men's barbers. Afterwards went to the swimming pool but annoyling had forgotten my swimmers so couldn't go for a swim, of course I was distraught at not being able to do any exercise! Anyway, got a credit so I could go back tomorrow. Instead of exercising I went home and fell asleep, much nicer way to spend a couple of hours.
Woke up just before 8pm. Had decided tonight that I was gonna go and take some pics of the bridge whilst it's still got the light display on it from New Year....it's up until the end of January so am running out of time. Caught the bus down to Circular Quay and basically I spent a couple of hours taking pics in the area, mainly of the bridge but also the buildings in the area, the Opera House and the Opera Bar. There was a big Australian Open tennis match on and a big screen has been set up at the bottom of the Opera House steps so they were rammed with people watching the match, took a couple of pics of that. Actually went up close to the OH for the first time and took a few pics up and around it.
Whilst I was up there I noticed a guy behind a gate sitting behind a bank of what looked like sound desks. Turns out he was the guy that was looking after the light display on the bridge and they were lighting desks. I thought the whole thing was automated and didn't realise some poor bugger has been sitting there every night since NYE making sure it all goes ok. The sequence is automated but they have a tech watching just in case there are any problems, he can also change the sequence and play around with it if he likes. I had a quick chat with him, he also helped me out with some light changes so I could take some pics of it. He's going to be helping to take it all down over the weekend, apparently it was all done with ropes and pulleys, no cranes! Amazing really considering how many lights there are and how high up too...anyway, enough geeky light chat.
Finished doing the pic thing about half ten and just got the bus back to Oxford St, couldn't be arsed to walk. Stopped off at Starbucks for a Crappafrappacinno and a flick through the pics on the camera, by the time you read this some will probably already be online so take a look! Just went home after Starbucks.
Saturday:
Got up about 9am and walked down to the swimming pool, remembered the swimmers this time! Was a real struggle this morning, maybe I just don't have the energy at that time of the morning, still managed to do the 1500 metres plus a 100 metre cool down. Had a complete nightmare with some new goggles I bought, they kept letting in water, even when I put them on so tight that they dug into my cheekbones....well ok not that tight but still not very comfortable, think I'll have to take them back or have massive facial reshaping.
Weather was supposed to be good for the day, though there seemed a lot of cloud around. On the way home from swimming I gave Al a call to see if he wanted to go to the beach. I know I said I wanted a few days thinking time but frankly I didn't need that long and enjoy his company so thought I'd call. He had plans for the day and a party in the evening tho so couldn't make it. Also contact Carlos to see if he was around, he said he was going to go to Bondi with a couple of friends but not till later in the afternoon, I wanted to go lunchtime coz I had bugger all planned for the day so decided to go my own way.
Mucked around for an hour or so at home, seemed to be getting even cloudier over the city but looking in the direction of the coast the sky seemed ok. Anyway, haven't been to the beach since boxing day so a visit was long overdue, jumped on the bus and went to La Perouse which is where I went to last time. It's about a 30 min bus journey south east, there are a couple of beaches, the smaller of the two is a nudist/gay beach so that's the one I went to....tho I reveal no more than my swimmers! I was glad I took the risk with the weather coz by the time I got there it was clear blue skies and really hot, a beautiful beautiful day for it. Pretty busy but managed to find somewhere to stick me towel. Stayed there for about 4 hours just relaxing, nipping into the sea every now and again to cool off, the water wasn't that warm but probably felt cooler coz the air temperature was so warm. Topped up the tan too and managed not to get burnt, probably coz I smothered myself in lotion.
Caught the bus home about 5, just dumped the stuff off and wandered down to Coles in Kings Cross to get some bits and pieces as the cupboards are slowly getting bare. Got home about 7 and made myself some dinner, then vegged out in front of the TV. Al called to see what I was up to, said I was probably gonna go out for some drinks later tho not have a late one, he said the party he was at was boring so he'd probably come into the city so he'd give me a call when he was around.
Went out about half 10, started off in Stonewall, had only been there about 15 mins and got talking to a bloke called Jason, a chef who supposedly used to run The Oxford bar. Chatted for about half an hour but I didn't really want to stay in Stonewall all night so got his number and wandered down to Columbian. Only had the one there but unusually quite enjoyed the music they were playing upstairs, in fact the whole night felt good, dunno why, maybe it's the first time i've been out on my own since meeting Al....maybe I like being a single boy flirting my way round Sydney....lol. Whilst in the Columbian Al called to say he was in the area so we arranged to meet outside the Brighton Bar. When I got there the bouncer (who Al knows really well) said we could crash the private party upstairs.
The party wasn't that great but we had a chance to chat, was the first time we'd spoken since the 'break-up/change of relationship/who knows what's changed' day and things seemed really comfortable, Al seemed to notice that I seemed more relaxed and he paid me lots of compliments....clearly he can't get over me! Anyway, after Brighton we went to the Shift and eventually made our way to The Oxford. The night had been going really well and as usual I was enjoying his company, but by 3.30 I was knackered so wandered back to mine, Al driving home - a good night had by all.
Sunday:
Was too hungover and tired to do anything in the morning other than sleep on and off, got up about half 12 and had scramble eggs on toast - a staple hangover brekkie, however I could barely stomach it, feeling a little delicate. Chucked myself in the shower and wandered down to Starbucks for a fruity Frappacrappa and a read of the sunday paper. Later in the afternoon I wandered down to the net cafe to upload and check all the pics I've taken recently, uploaded some of the Minolta ones and a load of pics taken in January to webshots, also burnt them to CD to free up the memory cards. Was there for a few hours and early evening.
Got home and Niki was out so just vegged in front of the TV for the evening, watching Meet the Parents which was alright but not the most hilarious thing I've ever seen. Back on earlies tomorrow so had and early ish night.
