Home Affairs? Do me a favour!
Trip Start
May 25, 2005
1
272
283
Trip End
Ongoing
Richards Bay,
South Africa
Thursday, September 18, 2008
Damn it!
I hate phoning Home Affairs, being anywhere near Home Affairs, even hearing about Home Affairs from a distance. It's not better to go there, or talk to them from a distance. They are generally a nightmare waiting to happen, in a nightmare building, in a nightmare part of town, with a nightmare attitude.
As I now live so far from Pretoria, I figured I would contact my local office in Richards Bay to ask whether my visa application had been approved, and if so, how I could get my visa put into my passport. Simple enough you would think! To find the number I Googled "South African Home Affairs, Richards Bay".
Google Result 1: 'Home Affairs employee found drunk at work'
Google Result 2: 'Johannesburg Police charged with corruption, working with Richards Bay Home Affairs employees.'
Damn it! Bugger! It wasn't going to be easy.
Apparently, if you go to Richards Bay HA, you stand in line for a long time and don't complain. A team from the government ministry watchdog went to visit, and found the employee at the counter 'not moving' although he had a pen in his hand. On being woken, the man fled the building, and he was suspected of being drunk. When questioned, it turns out he had only been drinking over the weekend and not recently (so that's OK then!). Nothing further was mentioned about the lack of help he was giving people. The same task team visited the local hospital and reported that 'many of the patients are lying directly on the metal bed frames, as the mattresses have been stolen. The hospital has no computers, so patients have to re-register on every visit as their files cannot be found.'
Not exactly breaking news, is it! But no telephone number.
Apparently, if you go to Richards Bay HA, and you are a Swazi citizen, you will probably automatically either go to jail, or owe the (drunk?) employee R1,000. The reason? There is no reason. But if you are from Swaziland, they will probably use that as an excuse to have you thrown into jail, sent to Johannesburg and made to beg your family for R1,000, when you haven't even had a trial or been charged. But still no phone number.
Google Result 3: South African Home Affairs Website. Telephone number listed. Horray.
20....30....40 rings later, and someone answers the telephone, and says nothing.
'Good Morning. I would like to speak to someone about a Study Visa please'
I get transferred.
10....20....30 rings, and someone answers the telephone and again, says nothing.
'Good Morning. I would like to speak to someone about a Study Visa please'
"Ok. Yes."
(Great, i think!)
'I would like to know if it is ready, please. I can give you my passport number, reference number.'
"Hmm. I can't help you. You must go to Pretoria."
'Ok. Why? I live 600km from Pretoria. It would cost me at least R2,000 and I don't even know if it is ready yet. So please can you help me to find out if my visa is ready yet?'
Pause
'What is your name?'
I start to spell my unusual and tricky surname and realise that something is wrong. She doesn't ask for confirmation of all the g's and e's and is that really an 'h' in there? She isn't even listening. I get to the end and she says: "No. I don't know your file."
Pause. It's not surprising as she probably has never done anything to help anyone, let alone read a file of a visa applicant. I try again.
'Ok. Well, when I was in Pretoria, the supervisor there said I could call you and you could look on the computer system under my name, passport number and reference number, and you would be able to tell me if it was ready or not. That is what they told me to do. That is what I am doing, so if you can't help me, please put me in touch with someone who can.'
Pause....
"I would be doing you a big favour to help you. I am not at my desk. Can you call back later on?"
'No. I have to walk to use the telephone.'
"I am not at my desk. It would be a big favour to help you." (BUT ISN"T THAT YOUR JOB?)
'What time shall I call?'
"Maybe in half-an-hour."
'Ok. Thank you for your help (yeah, right). I will call you back in half-an-hour (so you can know to not pick up the phone).'
The conversation ends, but why wasn't she at her desk? Isn't it her job to help people with inquiries? The application receipt says to call her! Maybe I should call her in half-an-hour and ask if it is true that people there are working with the Jozi police, taking part in extortion, and leeping at their desks as they are drunk? Maybe she could help me with that, if it isn't too much of a favour!
I bite the bullet, now furious at my increasing phone bill and lack of help. I decide to phone Pretoria - the place where my soul dies. I decide to phone the building that was the scene of such nightmares for days on end in May.
10....20....30....40....50.... No answer. I try a different number.
10....20....30....40....50.... No answer. I try a different number.
10....20....30....40....50.... No answer. Back to the first number.
10....20....30...and someone picks up.
'Oh. Good Morning', I splutter. 'I was just ringing to find out the result of my visa application.'
"Oh.Ok."
Transferred......10....20....30....40.....then the phone is answered.
'Hi there. I would like to know the result of my visa application please?'
"When did you apply?" I can hardly hear the lady as the noise in the familiar office engulfs the phone. People shouting, annoyed probably. People laughing, employees probably. I am already wondering why she even bothered to answer the phone.
'May 19th', I say - ready for a battle. It has definitely been more than 30 working days!
"Ok. Name."
'G....E....O....'
"G...E....O..."
And so it goes on. I feel like she is actually listening. I hear the phone go on to the desk as she walks away. Could she actually be going to have a look? Could she actually be trying to help?
Noise.
Laughter.
Noise.
Noise.
Chatter.....she's coming back. Then the words I thought that I would never hear.
"It is ready. You can come and collect it."
'Oh. Oh wow. Thank you. Do I have to collect it in Pretoria, or can I go to Richards Bay?'
"No. You must collect it here."
'Ok. Thanks. Where do I go when I get to the building?'
She described the same office that I spent two days in in May. I can picture the dark walls, with peeling paint. No chairs. No windows. No air. Long lines. Unfriendly people behind the bars....but I hear myself say:
'Thank you. What is your name?'
"Vusi."
'Well, Vusi. I have spoken to a few people today, and you are the only person who has been able or tried to help me. I am very grateful for your help and thank you very much.'
I hear her smile, if you can hear such things.
"Ok. Thank you. Goodbye."
And she was gone. Perhaps my thanks will help the next person in line, perhaps not. Perhaps my visa is ready, perhaps not. Perhaps my visa will be for a decent length of time, perhaps not. But I couldn't help but feel happy, and hopeful and amazed. I simply never thought I would feel any of those emotions in connection with Home Affairs.
So off to Pretoria I will go! Fingers crossed Vusi is working on that day too!
