Personal hygiene takes a back seat on holidays

Trip Start Sep 16, 2011
Trip End Nov 20, 2011

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Flag of United States  , Georgia
Monday, September 26, 2011

A happy family emerges from a good night sleep in Atlanta.

We make our way to breakfast. Not as fab as we are used to but it takes more than that to dampen our spirits on holiday.

Noah and Woody went for a swim whilst I looked into our next few nights accommodation and to see if we can get the NashVegas Round 2  plan to come together.

Noah and I also had to address the delicate matter of laundry.  Basically, almost all our clothes are dirty and we can't be bothered to do anything about it.  Elwood and I only have a few bits of random clothes left – so stay tuned for some exciting fashion.  Now, Noah.  Well, far be it from me to be indiscreet, but he ran out of clean underwear many, many days ago.   He has since bought some more pants, but there was a day or two inbetween running out, and then buying more pants that I just can’t account for.  These are the days we do not speak of.  And they were hot old days too.  Hmmm. 

And if I am being brutally frank, I am not much better.  My jeans came out of the dirty washing and onto my person before I had even left England.  They endured the flight (and another couple of days wear) before being relegated to the dirty washing, only to find themselves back on my person days later.  It’s like my clothes just go to the dirty washing for a rest.

So we are driving around with a massive and expanding  bag of dirty laundry in the back of the car.  To add to the magic, the car also smells of sausage and I cannot work out if the smell is coming from the dirty clothes (quite possible) or if there is a missing piece of sausage somewhere in Elwood’s car seat (also quite possible).  Either way, Noah’s gag reflex is toughening up.

We half heartedly attempted to do the washing today – we wanted someone to do it for us but were quoted between $42-$60 (they obviously got whiff of the sausage smell and decided to charge a bit extra).  After trying a couple of places, in not the most friendly places in town, and not wanting to actually sit around ourselves, we lost interested and headed to Wal-Mart to buy supplies for lunch.  Apart from taking pictures of old painted signs, this is our favourite distraction.

So we headed into Atlanta in the boiling heat with full bellies and a car full of stench.

Noah headed to World of Coca Cola on his own to take millions of photos freely.  He also sampled what he believes to be about 20+ soft drinks of varying luminousities whilst he was there.  He came back out of his tree on sugar.  By the way, can someone please tell Noah we do not collect  glass coke bottles.  He seems to think we do, and frankly, it’s a little on the heavy / awkward / potentially messy side to carry around for another 8 weeks.   

Elwood and I went to the Museum of Childhood.  Fab.  As you go in there is a tractor, and children go through the process of where food comes from – from farm to table and can play on everything.  Delivery  trucks, supermarkets, kitchens,  markets stalls etc.  Elwood loved it.  He really enjoyed playing  in the kitchen.  I realised he had actually not been near a kitchen in almost 10 days.  It was quite telling when Elwood made a pretend picnic in the kitchen and suggested we go and eat it in the play car – which we have done a bit of...

There was also an area where Elwood planted rows of fabric vegetable in a fabric garden.  And then raked them out to harvest them.  There was also a fishing stream where Elwood caught magnetic fish.  There was also a massive team game where kids collected balls and had to work together to get them through all sorts of apparatus to get them in a big net.  Elwood loved this.

We then met back up with Noah and Elwood had a good old razz around in another of Atlanta’s fabulous parks.  The sun was glorious and the park was just brilliant.

We then headed back to WalMart where I impulsively bought $50 of booze, snacks, a platter of fruit the size of New Zealand and ready meals.   I think I was hungry at the time. 

Back at the ranch, I slaved over the microwave (piercing plastic film and removing outer cardboard) to lovingly prepare my family what I like to call Ready Meal (Jimmy) Buffet.  No exaggeration (well, slight), delicious and nutritious. 

Then the boys jumped back in the freezing cold pool whilst I sat around in my damp stinky swimmers, thinking about getting in, and then just drinking coffee instead.  Now, as have already mentioned, our dirty washing stinks.  Our swimmers are off the scale bad.  I can only liken the smell to something I once smelt at my brother Justin’s (before he was married and well cared for by Jennie).  Justin left his clothes in the washing machine in the Queensland sun for a good day before putting them into the drier to sweat some more before popping on those sweet smelling beauties.  I am turning into my brother.  Yikes. (By the way, I am still wearing my swimmers – you clearly  get used to the smell after a while.)

Other than the general smell emanating from our persons, possessions and our car – Noah faces another challenge today - His facial hair.  Noah is meeting a contact tomorrow in Atlanta so thought he should attempt to tame his beast of a beard.  He charged up is shaver, shaved off his tash and took a chunk off just under his chin, and then the shaver died.  So – Noah spent the day looking like a bit of an Abe Lincoln enthusiast.  So, in one of our 2 Wal Mart visit Noah nervously picks up shaving cream and razors, and then says to me nervously 'This will only be the 2nd wet shave I have ever  had.’    He continued, ‘Imagine if I turn up to my meeting with band aids on my face and the bloke asks if I have been in a fight.’   It’s all about making the right first impression.

That’s it for today.  Stay tuned to see if we ever make it to the laundromat.

Finally, friends, I implore you, please try and remember us for the good clean people we once were, not for the stinky ferals we have become. 
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Leonie on

I have tears rolling down my cheeks, go wash those clothes...... And the justi anecdote pure genius!!!!!

diane binnie on

Hi Feraleves, please make sure you find your way to a launderette before I get there, and if you could double your efforts to locate the errant sausage in the car, I would be most grateful. Mxx

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