Personal hygiene takes a back seat on holidays
Trip Start Sep 16, 2011
290Trip End Nov 20, 2011
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We make our way to breakfast. Not as fab as we are used to but it takes more than that to dampen our spirits on holiday.
Noah and Woody went for a swim whilst I looked into our next few nights accommodation and to see if we can get the NashVegas Round 2 plan to come together.
Noah and I also had to address the delicate matter of laundry. Basically, almost all our clothes are dirty and we can't be bothered to do anything about it. Elwood and I only have a few bits of random clothes left – so stay tuned for some exciting fashion. Now, Noah. Well, far be it from me to be indiscreet, but he ran out of clean underwear many, many days ago. He has since bought some more pants, but there was a day or two inbetween running out, and then buying more pants that I just can’t account for
And if I am being brutally frank, I am not much better. My jeans came out of the dirty washing and onto my person before I had even left England. They endured the flight (and another couple of days wear) before being relegated to the dirty washing, only to find themselves back on my person days later. It’s like my clothes just go to the dirty washing for a rest.
So we are driving around with a massive and expanding bag of dirty laundry in the back of the car. To add to the magic, the car also smells of sausage and I cannot work out if the smell is coming from the dirty clothes (quite possible) or if there is a missing piece of sausage somewhere in Elwood’s car seat (also quite possible). Either way, Noah’s gag reflex is toughening up.
We half heartedly attempted to do the washing today – we wanted someone to do it for us but were quoted between $42-$60 (they obviously got whiff of the sausage smell and decided to charge a bit extra). After trying a couple of places, in not the most friendly places in town, and not wanting to actually sit around ourselves, we lost interested and headed to Wal-Mart to buy supplies for lunch
So we headed into Atlanta in the boiling heat with full bellies and a car full of stench.
Noah headed to World of Coca Cola on his own to take millions of photos freely. He also sampled what he believes to be about 20+ soft drinks of varying luminousities whilst he was there. He came back out of his tree on sugar. By the way, can someone please tell Noah we do not collect glass coke bottles. He seems to think we do, and frankly, it’s a little on the heavy / awkward / potentially messy side to carry around for another 8 weeks.
Elwood and I went to the Museum of Childhood. Fab. As you go in there is a tractor, and children go through the process of where food comes from – from farm to table and can play on everything. Delivery trucks, supermarkets, kitchens, markets stalls etc. Elwood loved it. He really enjoyed playing in the kitchen. I realised he had actually not been near a kitchen in almost 10 days. It was quite telling when Elwood made a pretend picnic in the kitchen and suggested we go and eat it in the play car – which we have done a bit of..
There was also an area where Elwood planted rows of fabric vegetable in a fabric garden. And then raked them out to harvest them. There was also a fishing stream where Elwood caught magnetic fish. There was also a massive team game where kids collected balls and had to work together to get them through all sorts of apparatus to get them in a big net. Elwood loved this.
We then met back up with Noah and Elwood had a good old razz around in another of Atlanta’s fabulous parks. The sun was glorious and the park was just brilliant.
We then headed back to WalMart where I impulsively bought $50 of booze, snacks, a platter of fruit the size of New Zealand and ready meals. I think I was hungry at the time.
Back at the ranch, I slaved over the microwave (piercing plastic film and removing outer cardboard) to lovingly prepare my family what I like to call Ready Meal (Jimmy) Buffet. No exaggeration (well, slight), delicious and nutritious.
Then the boys jumped back in the freezing cold pool whilst I sat around in my damp stinky swimmers, thinking about getting in, and then just drinking coffee instead
Other than the general smell emanating from our persons, possessions and our car – Noah faces another challenge today - His facial hair. Noah is meeting a contact tomorrow in Atlanta so thought he should attempt to tame his beast of a beard. He charged up is shaver, shaved off his tash and took a chunk off just under his chin, and then the shaver died. So – Noah spent the day looking like a bit of an Abe Lincoln enthusiast. So, in one of our 2 Wal Mart visit Noah nervously picks up shaving cream and razors, and then says to me nervously 'This will only be the 2nd wet shave I have ever had.’ He continued, ‘Imagine if I turn up to my meeting with band aids on my face and the bloke asks if I have been in a fight.’ It’s all about making the right first impression.
That’s it for today. Stay tuned to see if we ever make it to the laundromat.
Finally, friends, I implore you, please try and remember us for the good clean people we once were, not for the stinky ferals we have become.