American Odyssey

Trip Start Jul 27, 2010
Trip End Ongoing

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Where I stayed
Morritts Resort
Home Sweet USA (Hartrey House)

Flag of Cayman Islands  ,
Friday, July 30, 2010

LOCATION - New York / Cayman Islands (and a brief “ola” to Charlotte)
TIME - August 2010 on a land far from here
  1. leave MR Wolverine behind on Yankee soil
  2. pick up first stage American accent / lose Scottish twang
A stressful night in Hounslow preceded a stressful flight to JFK - but worse was to follow........  Captain James T Kirk never had to deal with “Stress Factor Wolverine” as US Immigration hit all time high levels of hurdle placing to turn the dog collection hour into the nightmare dog collection forever....  Steph’s threat to “kill everyone” finally saw us over the line though and happy parents were reunited with the little waggling pooch.  Gawd only knows what it will be like when we see her next year!!!!!  On the positive side though - Ma and Pa Hartrey and JJ (Steph’s recently shrunken / enlarged and beefed up brother) were all on hand to say ola.

A few days in New York enabled Nic to do some career progression and Steph to spend some money - with the new baby Apple joining the family - then we were West Indies bound, leaving Dutch to teach Wolverine how to swim / board floating crafts and open the treats door.

The Cayman Islands were hot, blue and fun.  "BC" (Before Car) saw us spend 3 days waking up, relaxing and going back to sleep - interspersed with a night of hilarity (if someone can explain how “Brad Pitt Yoghurt” leads to Val Kilmer - please let Jeff know, and cannae wait to see Martha Washington playing baseball), and lots of chit chat, bonding and laughter.

"AD" (after Da Car) saw us exploring the island a lot more - though 40 miles of driving will pretty much get you round the whole lot - so not too much.  We ventured too close to the “Blowhole” and were punished (see video).........  The Hartrey Foundation commandeered a Banana Boat and were punished (see scars).........  and we challenged Cuban Nick to Mudslide Wednesday and were punished (see diminished stocks of Tylenol (nee Paracetemol in UK)........

JJ destroyed Erwann on the Ping Pong (though the experienced man fought a good battle), Jeff destroyed the Captain Morgan bottle, whist Nic ripped it up in the gym on a daily (ish) basis.  The first (possibly annual) world breath holding championships saw a huge lack of ability across the board - however, some secret advice from UK will surely lead to a convincing win back at Dutch’s pool later in the week.......

The highlight of the week (and Steph’s life apparently - putting meeting Nic / getting married etc in the shade....) was the day trip to Stingray City.....  An awesome experience - thanks to Captain Marvin and Carl....  The rays were huge / friendly and felt like Portobello mushrooms... Grace found a new hat, Amanda screamed and the two J's (Jnr and Snr) managed to show their true colours (kissin' every gal in town).....

With the Rays behind us, we headed back to Port Chester for a few final family days.  A great BBQ in the sun (and the moon) showed us good times ahead, and an opportunity to catch up with lots more family and friends (Francesca and Gavin put in their postcard request - dangerous for their postman!!) - whilst Steph's grandfather's memorial was full of emotion.

More emotion was saved up for our goodbye to Wolverine.  Family Hartrey are used to Steph's time away now (though does not make it any easier) - but this was our first time we will be probably be away from our little monkey-beans!!!  It is tough to believe we will not get home each night to be greeted by more happiness and excitement than we dared to deserve, but them's the choices you make!!!  We will miss you Wolverine.

NEXT STAGE - a "splash and a dash" back in home UK - then fly, baby fly onward to Singapore.....

  • Best knowledge of directions to the Beach - JJ
  • Nicest Meal not eaten on the Island - Cock Soup and Big Black Dick Rum
  • Best place to buy and send a postcard - HELL!!!!
  • Worst game of all time - BUNCO (Potential best game of all time - Pizazz (@ Nic Cartwright) to be trialled over next 12 months.........)
  • Winners of the Cayman Islands Shuffleboard Invitation - The “Townhouse Cheaters” (NOTE to “Penthouse By the Bookers” - yes we cheated / no you did not spot it / yes you lost)
  • Thanks to Alison for Wolverine watching
  • Look out for Graus and Mr Jeff in the next Bond film
  • Welcome to to Cian Carelli who was born whilst we were in the Caymans and Congratulations to Lisa and Tony who became the proud parents....
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Mallonium on

Cayman Islands looks amazing - Big black dick AND coconut juice

Kathryn Ali on

You're too slow with the updates, what's this about Steph at the police station in Vietnam?! x

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