Happy birthday to me

Trip Start Oct 15, 2013
Trip End Apr 15, 2014

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Flag of Thailand  , Ko Samui,
Thursday, December 19, 2013

We are now on the paradise island of Koh Samui, which was an hours flight from Bangkok. Although it was only an hour or so on the plane, we had a meal included, and there were 7 different types of veggie meal- I didn't even know there were 7 types of none meat eaters! Anyway, the food was fine, the flight was short and the sun was shining, so jobs a good'un.

We have decided to take a rest from traveling at a million miles an hour and have a holiday- I understand that this is the ultimate first world problem (apart from not being able to find matching shoes for your little ratty dog, or you have too much money in your bank) but it can be hard work getting from place to place, constantly on the go, good type of hard work, but still hard work. So we booked five nights in a holiday resort which is the longest we have stayed anywhere for weeks, and planned to chill.

Koh Samui's airport is the nicest airport I have ever seen, it's made up of small huts that wouldn't look out of place on the beach and there are flowers and ponds everywhere. We got a taxi to our resort, and it took us quite a while to get used to people taking our bags for us. In South America, you need to hang onto your bags for dear life, if anyone offers to 'help you with your bag' you should only let them if they are fat or old, or you are confident that you could catch them when they run off with your stuff, same goes for your camera, only ask a fatty to take your picture. We were greeted at the resort with a drink and a refreshing towel (we had only been traveling for a few hours!) but our room wasn't ready so we sat my the pool and had a beer. Our resort is right on the beach, so you can see the sea from the pool, and the bar looks onto the beach, which is sandy, but there was a fair bit of seaweed. For some reason (probably because I'm a massive girl) seaweed makes me go all unnecessary- I love to eat it, but if it's not in a salad, or deep fried, it makes my skin crawl, so walking along the beach was an obstacle course for me. After an hour, we were shown to our private bungalow by a lovely young 'lady' who was very polite and made small talk (I have a well tuned gaydar, so expected that I would also have been able to spot the ladies who weren't born ladies, and I think I was right- Nath was completely oblivious). The bungalow was lovely, made up of a massive bedroom and a bathroom, and it had a small patio with some deck chairs and a table. For some reason, there was a large window from the bedroom to the bathroom, and the curtain was on the bedroom side?! So yes, as soon as Nath went to use the little boys room, I pulled the curtain, took a picture and posted it on the internet- like any good girlfriend would do.

The only tourist thing to do that didn't cost a bazillion bhat was to visit the Big Buddha, which is another temple about a 5 minute drive from our hotel. If you hadn't deciphered from the name, it's a big Buddha, which sits at the top of some stairs, and has a walkway around it, with about 15 bells, which you 'dong' with a big stick. That's about it really, we went and saw it, rang the bells and made our way back, but we did see a lovely sunset, which I think Koh Samui is famous for. On our way back we did visit a local market- this was is mistake as it stank to high heaven, and we had to leave after about 30 seconds because I thought I was going to throw up!

The next couple of days merged into another, sitting by the pool, swimming, eating and drinking. As it's the run up to Xmas there were a lot of families here who are here for the festive season (that would not do for me at all) and the prices of the hotel food were reasonable by British standards, but this is Asia, and we are on a budget! Luckily for us, on the beach, which was spitting distance from our loungers, were a couple of guys selling food from a BBQ they had fixed to a small canoe, selling things like corn on the cob and spring rolls for 30 bhat, which is about 55p so I would say that's a good deal. You do have to be careful with these kinds of things as they have chicken skewers which are out in the sun all day.

On Monday it was my birthday, but as we aren't spending money on presents (apparently) we celebrated with a smile, and spent the day by the pool. Thank you to everyone who sent cards, I really enjoyed opening them at early o'clock when Nath woke me up with them. In the evening, we went to a highly recommend restaurant called 69- and, well, it looked like a strip club, as we were walking up, I was thinking 'what have you brought me too Nath, it's my birthday, not yours!' The decor was gaudy to say the least, the table clothes were covered in sequins, the colours were neon pink and blue, there were net curtain drapes separating tables- it basically looked like an arts and crafts shop was sick on it. Oh, and don't even get my started on the bathroom, they hid the door behind a curtain, and when you got in there, they had chosen a garden theme, there was grass on the wall, and gravel all over the floor, with funny little ornaments everywhere. The strangest thing was they had a selection of reading material for the occupants, now don't get me wrong, I like to be entertained on the thrown, and I think it's hilarious when I walk last the loo to hear Nath playing games on his phone- even worse when he cheers (the game....... I assume) but I don't think it's acceptable to take your time in a restaurant toilet, that's not a place to loiter and catch up with the latest world events. Anyway, the food was really good, they managed to convert Nath to tofu (although I'm sure back in the UK, he will dismiss it as 'bloody hippie food' again) and we had a nice night. When we got back to our bungalow, we opened the door to see a gecko scurry behind the bed, Nath set about trying to herd the poor little thing out the door, but the gecko got confused and after half an hour Nath gave in. After reassuring me that the gecko wouldn't crawl into my mouth in the middle of the night, we forgot about him and assumed he would fine his own way home.

On Christmas Eve we strolled along the beach to the local fishing village, which is just a bunch of restaurants and shops, but we had found a restaurant which has a 99 bhat menu, so that fitted our budget nicely. As we wandered along, the conversation moved onto Christmas and opening presents. We had said we 'weren't doing presents' but in London, I made it clear that when girls say that, they 100% never actually mean that, but Nath's selective hearing seemed to have let this one fly under the radar and it turned out he hadn't gotten me anything- even though I been telling him for weeks I would like a necklace for Christmas, found one I liked in the fishing village, pointed it out directly and told him exactly how much to offer. I really wasn't that fussed about getting something, we are on a 6 month holiday and if I need something shiny to make it better, then that would make me one very ungrateful madam- but that didn't stop me from teasing him. Nath was born with the 'Torrington guilt' which means that he feels really guilty about things that really aren't that bad, and on this occasion, I had my fun with him. I spent the night pulling this face :( and saying in a poor me voice 'yeah, but I probably don't deserve anything anyway' and saying 'don't worry, I will really enjoy seeing you open your presents and how much you like them because they are so thoughtful'. This was torture for Nath, but he saw what I was doing and when I said 'don't worry, I know this is a massive fake out and you have got me lots of lovely things really, you wouldn't have got me nothing, you wouldn't do that to me' he laughed and simply said 'don't hold your breath'.

The next night, Nath woke me up with a start at 3am, his spidie senses were tingling- he had heard a rustling. In my dazed and confused state, I thought he meant outside our door, like a ninja or something, but the rustling was coming from inside our bungalow. Nobly, Nath sacralised one of his pillows and threw it at where the noise was coming from- but nothing emerged. We waited and listened for the noise again, upright in bed like meerkats, and there it was again, it was coming from the bin. Like a true hero, Nath took the bin outside, well, he pushed it out using an umbrella so as to keep it as far away from him as possible, when outside, it tipped over and the gecko scrambled out! I would like to point out that I used my grown up skills and didn't make Nath jump while he was hunting for the gecko, even though it was oh so tempting to shout 'he's on your back', these are skills I'm working on- they are a working progress admittedly.

Thought of the day- here are some examples of where I have exercised my grown up skills

When I was walking to work and a lorry stopped at some traffic lights. The lorry had a little digger on the back, and the 7 year old me in my head said 'jump on the digger and beep it's horn!' and grown up me said no!

When I went to Tesco, the charge was something like £3.02p and the wide boy behind the till asked me 'ya got 2 p?' and the 7 year old me in my head said 'nope, I went before I came out' but the grown up me said nothing.

Sometimes 7 year old me prevails, like when I walk past toys in a shop, if they have a little opening saying 'press me' or 'try me' oh man do I have to try them! Curiosity may have killed the cat, but if you aren't tempted to see what will happen, you are probably dead inside.
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