Long Weekend Escape

Trip Start Jan 01, 2012
Trip End Aug 15, 2014

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Flag of Spain  , Balearic Islands,
Thursday, July 18, 2013


So Tash and I came to the decision that after a stressful 6 months we deserved a quick trip away. With limited annual leave to play with we took to the internet and before we knew it had a booked a three day package holiday to Mallorca.

Guided by our budget we didn't really pay much attention to the finer details such as flight times, location, and accommodation and so at 3am on a Thursday we found ourselves driving through a dodgy heavily wooded area in search of airport parking. It was so dodgy in fact that I wouldn’t have been surprised if a man had of jumped out of the bushes wielding an axe. Needless to say we were very pleased when three hours later our plane touched down in Palma.

We had hoped that we were heading into beautiful sunny weather so were a touch disappointed, actually make that pissed off when we were greeted with grey skies and rain. It was sods law that just as England finally sees the sun we weren’t there and in fact had followed the bad weather abroad. It soon became clear that after an hour on a transfer bus our accommodation was in the middle of nowhere and that all plans we had made for attractions in other villages would not come to fruition, at least not unless we were willing to pay over one hundred Euro on a cab.

Fortunately by the time we reached our accommodation the sun had decided to grace us with its presence much to our relief. Our hotel was not exactly like I had pictured either, I knew we had booked cheap and cheerful but there is very big difference between cheap and cheerful and cheap and nasty and unfortunately our hotel was bordering on the latter. We had to air the room for 10 minutes before we could sit in it as the vapours of bleach were so strong that I thought I was going to pass out. The bedspreads felt like they were made of plastic and the batteries of the television remote were held in place with what looked like half a roll sellotape. I know that I am normally spoilt when it comes to accommodation-a perk of my job, but this hotel was of a lower standard than many hostels I have stayed at. With that said the sun was out, we weren’t at work and the beach was no more than 200 metres from our doorstep.

Before heading out to explore our surroundings we booked tickets to go to a dinner theatre show with transfers. You would think this would be a simple process with a hotel concierge but instead involved a very heated discussion between me and 2 members of hotel staff who were being incredibly rude…..this happened to be the same members of staff that had hung up on me a total of 5 times during the week when I tried to ask them questions about the property. Tash had to intervene to stop me yelling as they were seriously winding me up. An hour after having started the process we were confident our tickets had been booked.

We went for a wander exploring our local area and to suss out our meeting point for our pick up point for the show later that night. The town of Cala Millor was very quaint yet lively and the vast expanse of white sandy beach dotted with beach umbrellas was simply beautiful. Parked on the beach with the sun pouring down the stress of the day melted away and I could feel my London pastiness vanishing with it.

We returned to our hotel with ice, fruit and Sangria in tow ready to have a relaxing drink on our balcony before heading out for the evening. We arrived at our meeting point for the show with plenty of time to spare and an hour later were still waiting for the transfers to show. It became pretty apparent that the show was not meant to be. Instead of fuming like I normally would we headed instead to a Mojito Bar and Restaurant for dinner where we had to chase the waiter to come serve us. As beautiful as Mallorca was it soon became very clear that customer service was not the islands strong point.

We stumbled upon a small Yoghurt Bar for dessert that was to become our best friend over the coming days.

The following day with beach brolly and kindle in hand we parked our bums at the beach where we stayed for the majority of the day. I would love to tell you about all the exciting things we got up to on this day but the truth of the matter is that the only time I moved was when the sun moved and interrupted my lovely snooze on the beach.

That night we went on a mission to find Tapas or Paella for dinner. You would think this would be relatively easy given that we were in Spain but alas it wasn’t, it took an hour of hunting through all the German and English restaurants to find the one Spanish Restaurant and then had to wait half an hour to get in. The wait was worth it though, the food was divine as was the beachfront view and green and white gingham tablecloth…ah how I love a bit of Gingham. It just seems so European and so cute.   

Seeing as our plan to go clubbing in another town had been dashed by our location we headed out to a small local 'disco pub’-La Havana. With cocktails in hand and Tapas in our bellies it made for a fun night dancing into the wee hours of the morning. I came to the conclusion that Spanish men or at least the ones we encountered that night were very friendly, short and extremely forward.

The following morning our plan was to go on a 4 hour boat cruise around the island, we were rudely told to hurry up and board a boat despite our protests that it was the wrong one and found ourselves suddenly on a two hour round trip to the wrong destination, it was also the choppiest boat I have ever been on and all around plastic see through bags were being handed out left right and centre to all the ill passengers, Tash included. All I can say is that it was the longest two hours of my life.

After being freed from our nautical torture prison and making our complaints with the service provider we headed back for a Frozen Yoghurt and then to return to our spot on the beach. After swimming in the warm sea which I haven’t done in years and sun drying our skin we decided to hit the shops and venture into the numerous souvenir stalls. It never fails to surprise me how much crap is in these types of shops, and yet I still found myself purchasing a giant 60cm x 60cm butterfly and panicking about how the heck I was going to squeeze it into our already full suitcase.

The Tapas from the night before had been so good that we decided it would be a shame not to go back and so we were back to our beachfront table dining on what can only be described as Spanish goodness with a jug of Sangria between us and the sun setting behind us.

The following morning it was time for another long transfer to the airport. We were cutting it fine for check in of our flight and I was panicking for the 30 minutes before we made it to the airport. It wasn’t until I was strapped into my seat I was able to breathe again.

I know reading this entry back it sounds quite negative and I really didn’t intend it to be. This was possibly the most relaxing/infuriating holiday I have been on. It felt almost like the forces were against us from the start with everything that could possibly go wrong turning to custard. It seems that the higher powers who/whatever they may be were determined that Tash and I were to just spend our three days on the beach relaxing. I did have a fantastic time and loved the destination itself but customer service there was simply non-existent. I did learn a valuable lesson to actually pay more attention to what I’m booking rather than being sucked in by a cheap price but when push comes to shove I did get what I was hoping for….sun, sand and sangria.

Until Next time,

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