Year 2 In Review, 1 Year Left?
Trip Start
Apr 06, 2003
1
59
69
Trip End
Ongoing
Amsterdam,
Netherlands
Thursday, April 7, 2005
Tonight at 8:00, the entire country of The Netherlands conducts a 2-minute moment of silence. It is one of my favorite times of the year. The silence is more deafening than a train-wreck occurring during a thunderstorm. This moment is the climax of the Remembrance Day ceremony that occurs every year on May 4. It is a time when the Dutch remember those who died in war. It is the perfect time to look backwards.
At the same time, the Dutch begin to look ahead to more positive things as Liberation Day is tomorrow, May 5. It is another big party, although not as big as the party that just passed, Queen's Day. Liberation Day is celebrated with live music and dancing. It is generally a good day to be from one of countries referred to 60 years ago as 'The Allies'
01. 7 more weeks!
. It is a national holiday every 5 years and this year is one of them. It is the perfect time to look ahead.I find this 2-day event, Memorial Day and Liberation Day, as an ideal time to write a t-pod about our 730 days in A'dam because it is the perfect time to look backwards AND the perfect time to look ahead (see the t-pod entries from May 11 '03 and July 21 '03 for more info on Memorial Day and Liberation Day).
We look backwards on the past year. A year that included travel, visitors, work letdowns, social activities, work improvements. We look ahead to the coming year. A year that will include a job search, maybe a new home, possible goodbyes, hopefully more visitors, certainly more travels, and one special addition to the Kantor family (see the attached pics of Julie, with ~7 weeks left).
Looking backwards, since moving here in Apr. '03, we have traveled quite extensively. In fact, Jan. '05 was the only month since we've been here that we haven't gone away for at least a weekend, as CRAZY as that is! This past year, we visited Germany 3 times (Oktoberfest, Berlin, and the Mosel River castle and wine region), France 3 times (Paris, Provence, and the Alsace wine region), Gent Belgium, spent 2 weeks in Italy (one of which was driving around Tuscany and Umbria and the other in Cinque Terre, the Italian Lakes, and Verona), experienced the Athens Olympics, spent time in London, Prague, and a week in Vienna and Budapest (this also remindes me that I have a few t-pods to write but I think you'll get a few of these soon, sorry for the delay!).
02. Look at that belly!
We have had many visitors and this year, we welcomed our parents, Uncle Jon and D.D., Andrea and Jeff, Robin and Mitch, Sasha, Justin and Erin, Joey, Gabrielle and Ben, and a few people from work.
Julie's career as a teacher has had many ups and downs, unfortunately none of which resulting from a fulltime job heading a classroom. She arrived just after earning her Masters in Education and had been so excited about the opportunities presented to her and then utterly disappointed when the school did not pursue the work permit that they promised. We eventually learned from this roller coaster of emotion and decided that even if a school contacted her with an opportunity, she should reject them as we suspect things would eventually fall through anyways.
But as a result of this situation, Julie had a better year this year as she has fully embraced her 'expat-wife life' - one that I too hope to get someday. It is a life that includes lunch dates, mahjong games, knitting circles, laps in the pool, and many many naps. She seems to be very happy with her life and has developed quiet a social circle. The shy girl I used to know seems to have developed self-esteem I have never seen in her.
Inside the bank, things are going very well also. While I haven't always loved my day-to-day job here, I am now in a new group that I enjoy very much. I am learning a lot. I can tell that my analytical skills are improving and I am learning about some different types of banking products. I enjoy my colleagues and feel as if they actually respect me and view me as a part of their team. My manager is helping me to move along and progress as well. And now that I am away from my old group, I have also had a chance to look back on that experience and while it seemed for a while that the only tangible skills I was developing was a mastery in PowerPoint presentations and the fasted cut/paste in the country, I now realize just how much I have learned about the bank itself. My network within the bank is also far greater than I could've ever imagined it would be. So all in all, work is and has been very good.
However looking ahead, we look ahead to the difficult part of deciding what I want to be when I grow up. As I mentioned above, we love living here from a personal standpoint, would love to stay longer but only if it make sense professionally. We are currently here because we both thought it would be cool to live and work abroad so we basically pursued any opportunity figuring that work abroad and at one of the largest international bank's headquarters would never be bad for my resume. But the motivation was never about the job, that was merely the vehicle in which the move would be accomplished.
But while the job is going well, it has at times felt like a traineeship. I have often felt like I was coasting aimlessly. In fact, when I recently asked a very senior person in the bank what he thinks I should be trying to experience in my last year in A'dam, he told me "ride the wave". That is all nice and good, but what happens if the wave takes me out to sea? I realize that he was trying to tell me to continue what I'm doing by meeting people, learning about the culture of the bank, and how to navigate it but it is quite scary and overwhelming to wonder how these intangible skills will help me in my career at the bank. I've been wondering lately 'what is going to be my next job?' No clue. 'Where is my career going?' No clue. I imagine I'll do OK within the bank but in what area? Risk? The business line? Finance? These all seem to be options available to me but nobody seems to have any real concrete ideas. I know I still have a year to figure this out and I believe it will work out, as I am young (ie. cheap) enough that practically any group within the bank should have a spot for me. Also, I will have experience at Head Office, which is also something that many in the bank don't have. But the uncertainty is somewhat overwhelming. Just which area is for me? And is it in Chicago or A'dam...or elsewhere? I'd love to see something work out here in A'dam but it will really have to have a very specific career path as I am tired of 'surfing'.
If we indeed do decide to move home, as I would suspect will happen, we will need to say goodbye (or 'see you soon') to all of those friends we made here. In fact, we've already thrown out the idea of meeting our Aussie friends in Bali as it is in the middle of Chicago and Sydney! And even in Chicago, many of our friends in are now beginning to leave the city. So in a way, Chicago also would be a new home.
Even if we stay in A'dam, we will likely move to a new apartment as our needs have changed and the prospect of not having to deal with stairs is very appealing!
However, we do still have 1 more year (at least) so we will hope to have some last-moment visitors - although don't wait too long because there are still a few places we want to travel also. We hope to visit Portugal before the end of '05.
And of course, we are excited about the birth of our first child at the end of June. Julie is feeling pretty good although she has been slowing down lately and needs some extra backrubs. We are certain that the baby will bring about lots of changes and I know it will have an effect on how things progress in the next year!
So in the spirit of Memorial Day, we look backwards at this past year, our 2nd away from Chicago, and in the spirit of Liberation Day, we look ahead knowing that the next year will be a very exciting and interesting one which will hopefully provide some answers to all the questions that are out there. With that, I bid you all a very successful year with lots of health, love, peace, prosperity, knowledge, conversation, improvement, and adventure and hope that Year 3 provides Julie, baby Kantor, and I with the same.
Speak with you all soon and we'll keep you posted as the days ahead pass.
-Stephen
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