No crazy adventures...

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Flag of Thailand  , Chon Buri,
Monday, November 28, 2011

So by this morning the beer was starting to really get to me and this chest infection just wouldn't quit. We met up and headed down for breakfast which was just toast and coffee and the coffee was cold. I went next door and got some tablets to take the edge off. I got something for the cough and something to fight the infection all issued over the counter. Considering the clerk was coughing more than me, I wasn’t too optimistic.

So with breakfast done and slightly disappointing we slowly, very slowly headed back out into town. We wanted to go over to the island, it’s off the coast and you can hire scooters and guns. Marcin had never shot anything before and after being surrounded by weapons through our trip he wanted something to go bang in his hand.

We had a wait for the ferry so we went and got some food, I was still hungry after my guts had taken the opportunity to empty out their entire contents. We’re still not right in that department either. I don’t think it’s the food here, I’ve never had any problems before, I think it’s still a lingering problem with our recent ride through the open sewers. I ordered a cheese omelette, I love cheese and it’s hard to find here for some reason so it went down a treat. Marcin claimed he wasn’t hungry but found room for something. We caught the ferry and it plodded its way over taking roughly 45 minutes. It’s a bargain, only 30bhats to get over, about 75p but the trip back costs 150. Typical of the tourist industry. We finally got there and within minutes were offered a ride to the shooting range. It was actually really difficult, we had to hire scooters and the staff made everything many times harder than it needed to be. Finally we got under way, mine was ok but Marcin’s seemed to be less powerful. The maintenance on the island must be fairly poor. We finally made it to the range and it was not what I was used to and exactly what I expected. Safety standards were non-existent and the few guns on offer were as poorly maintained as the bikes. Marcin went first and chose a rifle, a Sig Sauer 552. He didn’t realise it was just a sporting conversion with a 22lr sleeve and was about as exciting as throwing pebbles at a lake. To give him credit he hit most of the little metal targets he aimed at down the range and most people don’t even get close on their first time. The prices were insane so I settled for a clip in a .22 Ruger pistol. There were a choice of two but the one I chose was apparently broken. The one I ended up with jammed on the second shot and grouped at around 8 inches at only 20 yards. We were both disappointed and just went for a ride on the scooters. We found a viewing point and snapped a few pics but clearly Marcin couldn’t get the lacklustre experience out of his head. He wanted to shoot something with a bit more power. I suggested the Franchi SPAS 12 shotgun. We headed back to the ATM and got the cash for him to have another go. He got 7 rounds for about 15 which was a bit steep for my taste. He asked for advice so i showed him how to stand and how to hold the butt in close to his shoulder. He refused the ear-protection and I laughed at him so he thought better of it and wore them. He racked the pump and fired at a melon they’d set up for a target. The gun was in poor order and the shot exploded out with a plume of acrid black smoke blasting out of every orifice in the gun. Marcin was jolted backwards and was grinning wildly like a kid with a new toy. Somehow even the pump-action combat shotgun managed to jam up but he seemed to have fun with it.

After that he was hungry so we stopped for him to eat some deep fried dead things on sticks and headed back to the ferry. A guy offered us a ride on a smaller passenger speed-boat for only 200bhats each, only 1 more than the slow, boring, plodding ferry. We took that and it was far more fun. It crunched and jumped over the waves, crashing down hard until doors on cupboards fell off inside and the female passengers screamed. It was cool. We were back in around 10 minutes and delivered right to the hotel. We had been left a message by a guy in the hotel. We called it up and the guy was a fellow biker from the UK who had moved to Pattaya 6 years ago. We arranged to head out to eat and meet him later at the hotel.

I guess the omelette had whetted my appetite and I fancied something distinctly western. We found a kebab shop run by an actual Turk so we gave it a try. I had falafel and Marcin had something with meat in it. It was spicy but far and away the best Turkish food I had eaten outside of Germany, the food in Turkey was actually quite poor. We had a quick chat about it with the owner who seemed happy to be appreciated and then went off to meet the guy. We grabbed some beers and sat in the lobby waiting. He turned up later on a Harley Davidson. We wandered down to the beech and chatted for hours. He had an interesting perspective on the red-light district. The previous night we had walked through and I had begun to find it a bit on the offensive side. You can’t go 5 yards without being offered a show or a good time. One guy offered a show where a girl would shoot needles and razor blades out of her vagina I told him angrily I wanted to see him do that with his vagina and he backed away fairly suddenly. Unfortunately there were plenty more where that came from.

Now this biker was older than us and maybe a bit wiser, either way he’s seen a side of this country i’m not too fond of. He said Pattaya is "reject city". All the girls are damaged goods, they’ve got kids they can’t support, husbands who ran off and families that don’t want them. Girls here have no earning power, they make less than 100 a month in honest jobs and obviously can’t live on that, even more so when they have to send money home to support their children. The guys are damaged too, mostly they’re fed up with their home countries, they’re old or fat or just not attractive to women and mostly he was right. The place simply isn’t crawling with young lads on a party weekend, it’s full of guys and women simply making the best of it in an economy that is just hopelessly biased.

So the last night in Pattaya we spent having a few quiet beers on a beach with a nice guy we met here. Nothing heavy and no crazy adventures to report.... at least officially.
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thu on

Does your fancy mini-harley shoot ping pong balls out of its exhaust pipes?

naga on much buy the pistol original not airsoft.

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