Trip Start Aug 20, 2009
Trip End Ongoing

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Flag of New Zealand  , North Island,
Sunday, April 4, 2010

Easter Sunday saw Grandma and Papa leave New Zealand for Bangkok, Thailand.

I really don't want to dwell too much on this event.  As I'm sure everyone will imagine it wasn't a nice experience and emotions were hard to contain.  The hardest part was not knowing how Lucy and Dan were going to react.  Obviously as adults, we have a good idea of how we are going to react, however, children are another matter altogether.  As it turned out Dan took the whole event in his stride, whilst Lucy fell to pieces, and was very emotional for many days afterwards.

It really did feel incredibly strange on arrival home from the airport, the house felt empty and the feelings were as though someone had died.  We tried to explain to Lucy why she felt the way she did and why she would calm down and then her mind would wander on to Grandma and Papa and the tears would start again.  All extremely hard for anyone to deal with, never mind a seven year old!  Once again the wounds were open and the feeling of guilt was unbearable at times. 

We still know that we made the right decision to come to New Zealand.  When asked, the children said they would not like to go back to the UK to live, they are happy here.  However, our decisions have made so many people close to our hearts sad and upset - and that in itself really hurts.  We had no idea that this goodbye would make us miss everyone else in the UK too, skyping my mum and dad without tears suddenly became a problem again, as did seeing Emma on the computer.  Lots of quiet times contemplating the events of the last 8 months.  Wondering if every goodbye is going to be this difficult.  Is it something that you learn to deal with?  Will we all learn to control our emotions?

However, here I am a week after Grandma and Papa left, and I can write this entry without tears.  A week has certainly made such a difference to everyone.  Even Lucy's tears have dried up - thank goodness.  Perhaps we will become practiced in how to deal with our emotions and this healing time will reduce over time.  Here's to many more visits from family and friends - a chance to share our new life and new country.  Bring on the winter and a chance to explore new places and the next chapter of our adventure.
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