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  Caracas, Central Venezuela, Venezuela
Sunday, April 20, 2008

The plane left Lima, crossed the Equator somewhere over the Columbian jungle, and landed in Venezuela at around tea-time. After Peru, Caracas feels like a smack in the mouth. Every journey has its low point, and I think I found mine at about 7 o`clock on Sunday night in Caracas, Venezuela (but there`s over 20,000 miles to go before I get home, and plenty of time for "lower lows" further down the road I suppose).
This whole place seems deliberately designed to stop you doing anything whatsoever. After 5 miserable hours on the internet trying to book accommodation, I came away with one night´s bed and breakfast (in not too grand a place) for an eye-watering $150. The alternative was a pitch in a compound next to the airport for $390 - I was struggling, and beginning to hate the place before I`d even arrived. The warning signs were all there months ago, if I`d bothered to heed them.......
Originally, I wanted to visit Columbia and not Venezuela at all, but in terms of air routes, Bogota is a bit of a cul-de-sac, and so Caracas it had to be

View from my room, Caracas

. Venezuela is an incredibly diverse country, and there`s too much choice of things to do and see in the limited time I`ve got, but I eventually plumped for the Canaima region down in the South East, and a visit to Angel Falls. Whenever I tried to book anything from the UK though, things quickly became incredibly difficult and I got nowhere. The whole system seems geared up for travellers coming from outside the country (i.e. flying in directly from the States and Europe), and not starting inside the country. For South America, it was also extremely expensive (and we`re talking $1,000`s here). Back in January, I decided to hold off booking anything until I reached South America, where things were bound to be easier. Mistake Number 1.
When I arrived, there were a couple of hours to spare before it got dark. You`re advised to travel between the airport and Caracas in daylight, because armed gangs sometimes hold up traffic on this road after dark (nice). I cleared Immigration, and was one of the first people to exit into the main terminal - Mistake Number 2. There were touts and hustlers all over me like a rash, and they weren`t letting go - they hung on like limpets. You need to choose your taxi carefully here: get in the wrong one and you`ll never reach Caracas. To cut a long story short, I eventually ended up with a $75(!) ride into town - Heathrow is cheaper. We left the airport and drove straight into a traffic system designed by the spastic son of Satan

Same view in daylight

.
After Sao Paulo, Caracas is the most dangerous city in South America, and you really must take your security seriously. You`re advised to avoid the Centro/Sabana Grande area at night at all costs - the taxi pulled up outside my Hotel, slap bang in the middle of Sabana Grande, just as it was going dark..........
Sensible people don`t venture out at night here, and if they do it`s a taxi ride from door to door, but what was I supposed to do? Fly 1,700 miles from Lima just to cower in my Hotel room? So, out I went - and at night this is one seriously scary place. The pack-drill is the same as anywhere with a bad reputation: walk round like you own the place, don`t make eye contact, don`t stop moving, and only carry what you`re prepared to lose in a robbery. Make sure you carry something though, as people have been shot because the fact that they that didn`t have anything to rob has seriously pissed off their muggers - about $20 is the going rate. If you are robbed, let them have anything they want, and don´t try and be a hero.
The striking thing about this area of Caracas is that you can move from the forecourt of a $400 a night Hotel, where it is light, bright and there are plenty of people around, into the shadows and the dumpsters within about 10 paces. This is where you`ll find the crazies, the desperates, the derelicts and the just plain nasties

Don`t even think about staying here,,,,,,

. Drive-by shootings don`t feel like a possibility here, they feel imminent..........
I eventually found myself a bar, ordered a sandwich and a couple of beers, and listened to lots of Salsa music. Salsa is the music of the streets here, and it sounds like this:
http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=ceVWbX2NhPM
I think this band are Columbian, not Venezuelan, but when the music began, people got up out of their seats and started to dance - it was a really good atmosphere in there.
My Hotel was a pit. When I first arrived, they`d never heard of me (even though I was holding a reservation in my hand). This was eventually sorted out, but it was just a taster for what was to come - when you find other people`s pubic hair in your bathroom, you just know that Housekeeping aren`t up to the mark. Breakfast was vile. I thought I was eating some sort of fishy concoction, until I found chicken bones in it - God knows what it was.
Out on the streets next morning, Caracas looked a lot better in daylight. I still have an accommodation problem though, and my master plan is to swiftly relocate to Isla Margarita off Venezuela`s Caribbean coast. The internet problems and the Venezuelan way of doing business are still causing me headaches though. To pre-book accommodation on Isla Margarita over the internet, needs 48 hours notice (but I need somewhere to sleep tonight!), and it`s only payable via Western Union money transfer, not credit card - I abandon my Hotel search and decide to take my chances on finding somewhere to stay when I arrive.
The airline websites are even worse. The website of the main carrier (Aeropostal) has been down for days - I`ve been checking it since Puno, and there`s nothing doing. I try another airline, and the fare system is screwed - they would like me to pay $2,000 for a 40 minute flight. Airline number three, and I`m finally getting somewhere - yessssss! Then the server goes down just as I`m trying to make the payment and I`m back to square one. Stuff the internet. I flagged down a cab, drove over to the offices of Airline Number Three, and came out with a ticket in my hand - result!!    I`m. Out. Of. Here.
Caracas airport continues with the general theme of grinding you down and pissing you off. In Departures, 9 out of 10 information boards only display Arrival information - why would you want to know that in Departures? I`m still trying to work it out. The one Board that actually displays Departure information only tells you about flights that have already departed (i.e. the ones you`ve missed), not flights that are about to depart. Everything seems designed to cause maximum confusion and angst. I finally find my gate which is displaying departure information for a flight to a different part of Venzuela altogether.
When I sit down and think about it, Venezuela isn`t improving at all. Although I have a plane ticket, I´ve got no accommodation when I arrive, and at the moment I`ve no confidence that this plane will even take-off (and if it does, it will probably fly to the wrong place). If things don`t get better, I decide to make a break for Aruba, or Trinidad, both of which are fairly close - but of course the bloody internet doesn`t work properly here, so I won`t be able to do that, will I?
Sigh............................

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