Good Morning VIETNAM!!

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  Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon), Vietnam
Sunday, September 10, 2006

I'm here!!!! I finally made it to Vietnam last night! It is a big step in my journey because from here on out I only head North before I make my big push West across China towards Europe. And as an added bonus I finally get to use the title "Good Morning Vietnam!" I am in the capital of the South. A city called Ho Chi Minh or Saigon if your old school. I will write more on Vietnam after I get settled in.

Ok, so I decided that I wanted to see a bit of the Cambodian country side the day before yesterday. What better way to see the countryside then saddled up on a "crotch rocket" right? I know last time I took out one of these "steel ponies" it ended up in a bloody mess. But my mummy did not raise a quitter! She taught me that when you fall off a horse you get right back on it! So I was having a great day cruising the lonely dirt roads and rice fields when all of a sudden the rains came. It is monsoon season here and it can start raining on a dime. So here I am in the middle of nowhere on a motorbike with nothing to protect me and my $1000 camera from the rain. So I had to think quick of a plan. After about 23 seconds of planning I had an idea. My options where limited at this point! Either my plan was going to work, or it would just end up a funny story. There was nothing out there but rice fields and the occasional grass hut. I found the nearest hut, pulled my bike in, casually walked inside, waived to the family, and pulled up a chair with them at the table. That is it! That was my big plan? Cambodians are really friendly people, so I figured they would not kick me out. I figured they would be so confused they that they would not know what to do. You need to understand that most of these country side people have never even been to the nearest city, much less ever had a real life "Uncle Tom" causally stroll into there house and pull up a chair. They did not seem to think anything of it? Let's do a role reversal here. Imagine you were at home sitting out a rain storm and a non-English speaking Cambodian man strolled into your house and pulled up a chair at your kitchen table. You would be freaked out, right? I must mention that we did not have a lick of common language between us. So all we could do is sit and look at each other while waiting for the rain to stop. Because of the rain, and due to the fact that I had so much fun in my first stop, I had to pull this off another 2 times. My last stop of the day ended up being my favorite. I pulled under a hut with about 10 people sitting around. Oddly enough one of the guys was pulling the heads off of these giant grasshoppers and stuffing the bodies with peanuts. I could only guess what was their intentions were with those grasshoppers, and I also knew that there was no way I was going to avoid it. Sometimes I get caught up in everything that is going on around me and I do not realize the situations for there true novelty factor. I was sitting in the middle of a Cambodian rice field in a grass hut with about 10 non-English speaking natives frying bugs to eat. Eat Shit National Geographic! After they fried up the delicacy for us (I had 2!) they asked me for 1000 Riel or about 25 cents so they could buy them some homemade rice booze. Who was I to deny my "new friends" after they shared there bugs with me? It was getting dark so I had to get on my way. After a good 20 minutes that I was finally back on the road was when I realized that I had forgotten my helmet at one of the huts/houses? It was about to get dark so I had to hurry if I wanted to find the helmet and get back into town. Of course it was all the way back at the first house/hut I had stopped at. After I got the helmet I was speeding down the muddy dirt road when I came upon "my obstacle." When I saw it I new I was screwed! I was going to fast to stop. I knew from the first second that it was not going to end pretty. I had 2 options: 1. Steer right and try and jump the 2 foot pot hole or, 2. Hit it straight down the muddy middle and try my luck. I went with #2! Maybe I should have tried the "Evil Kanevil " option? Unfortunately the second I hit the rut me and my "bronco" went separate ways! I never had a chance!!! Unlike my last crash that I still have scars from, this time I faired much better then the bike. I was OK (a little muddy) but the bike was a different story. I broke the right fender completely off, smashed in the front basket, and broke the right hand brake in half. I now had to come up with a plan to tell the owner of the bike (I rented it from some guy on the street for $5.) I could not think of anything to tell him about what happened to the bike other then I was riding down the street and the fender and brake "they just fell off?" And about the basket, "I have no idea, but now that you mention, it does look a little odd?" I do not think the guy believed my story, but luckily he took me up on my offer of $5 and calling it even. So with any situation like that, I had to skip town on the next bus out before the guy changed his mind and wanted more money! So here I am today in Vietnam!

So the lesson we learned here today......... maybe "Road Hogs" and Johnny No. don't go well together? I will leave you with a few words of wisdom from Nancy Sinatra "These boots are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do."

Sometimes they just fall apart! -Johnny Nomad

I would like to send out "mad proops" to Elisabeth McKowen the President/Founder of the unofficial "Johnny Nomad Experiment" fanclub.

R.I.P. "Croc Steve!"

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