On the Verge
Trip Start
Jan 20, 2008
1
28
53
Trip End
??? ??, 2010
Adelaide,
Australia
Thursday, April 17, 2008
We navigated roo's and avoided all ditches and made it safely to Adelaide, after a great road trip via the Great Ocean Road. We have spent 3 days with Stan and Rob, sharing some wonderful nights around the dinner table, wining and dining and laughing. Such great energy and conversations, and Caroline is a blast to be around, so animated and funny and wise. A beautiful woman. And a freaking great buddy for our road trip!
From here, Heath and I are trying out our first Solo Adventure! Caroline and I will head up north to Alice Springs and Darwin, while Heath will hitch his way up there, then I'll make my own way to Bali and meet up with Heath in...ONE MONTH! EEK! Of course I have kindly warned Caroline that without my giant bald teddy bear I may try to spoon her in the desert.
Jokes aside, this is absolutely the most exiciting and scary thing I've ever attempted, but it's absolutely monumental for me. I firmly believe you learn so much about yourself from travelling by yourself, and we would kind of be cheating ourselves if we went through our entire trip for 2 years without allowing for this experience. And as you have well noted, this trip for both of us is very much about personal growth, as well as having a wonderful adventure together. That part is easy - we both know we have a blast travelling together, and we know we have an amazing relationship with each other--I just have to work on my relationship with myself, which I don't know enough about! It needs a little work and, at times, it needs a lot. I know that doing this is essential to helping me figure out some of the things I struggle with, including just defining myself a little more - what I truly love and am passionate about, and then actually doing these things without having to think about anything else, or being tempted to take the easier, comfortable route and meld into being a couple, and forgetting that we are also individuals.
EEK! So this is the beginning of our great solo chapters, and how fitting for me that it will begin here in Adelaide after I have reconnected with my early friends and family and my little girl self! It's going to be a ride - i'm expecting some serious ups and downs, and it's going to require a lot of Chutzpah
(that's Yiddish for Cahones. Which is espanol for Bollocks. Which is cockney for Knackers. Which is Aussie for Bawlls, so if any of you have some to spare, please send them my way!)
And hell it's going to be one hell of a reunion on Bali!! OOH WEE!
Love,
Ings
P.S.
Last night in Melbourne with Stu and James
Phil we love you and miss the hell out of you, it was awesome, really really awesome, to talk to you!! Take care Brotha and we're thinking about you!!Heath here:
I couldn't have said it any better. We both know how to enjoy life quite well. There are a few things that we are aware of that are holding us back a bit. Because we are of such great comfort to each other, we don't really NEED to work on them. We always help each other through any insecure times, but it does affect the relationship from time to time. We both feel "needy" at times and it comes from something missing in the self. Appreciation is what we're trying to master, not "neediness". I am just as scared as Ingrid about solo travel. I have never taken a trip where i didn't go with someone or go somewhere where i knew someone. Being afraid to be alone and work your way through some time without any physical presence of friends and family is where you will find the truest sense of yourself. I'm tired of my fears leading me at times. This is not a mid-life crisis, this is a mid-life step up! I am shedding childhood fears and societal paradigms and making all my choices from here on out my own, for the betterment of me, the people around me that i care about and the rest of the things in the world that we should be caring more about. There are a lot of good people out there in the world, and i am going to go meet them, learn from them and be a positive example for the US. I have spent most of the last 10 years of my life being a teacher and often times trying to be a voice of reason to friends and family in times of stress. Most of my relationships I have been the elder. I feel that for some time now i am telling the same stories, giving the same advice, etc. I really haven't taken much time for my own personal growth for quite some time. I don't feel very good about this. I am enjoying being a student again. This is the main reason, for me, wanting the solo time. With Ingrid, I want to be the steady ground at her feet. I worry for our safety in every possible situation. Being together all the time, we start drifting into the self, when we should be focusing on each other. Our goal is to get the self back, much higher than ever, and make our time together appreciative and more loving than either of us has ever experienced. Because i believe all happiness in your life starts with love, respect and confidence of the self. This is when you can love another unconditionally. That's livin'.
Comments
The Singa Inga!
I am not sure what Heath is going to do without you around?! ;) The scariest things hold the most risk but with that risk is the potential for amazing gains. I think you have begun to truely understand that, and that's a huge thing to learn in life. Stay true and stay open to it and to yourself and no matter what the outcome you will have gained more than you will ever lose. And if you need a little ballege I always have a pair tucked away. xoxo
and heaps of Heath!
I imagine you as some indian guru going away for 40 days into the wilderness. Fading into the dark undergrowth of a jungle cleanly shaven. Only to find you weeks later sitting on a rock high above the forest meditating, a grizzlyed guru hair down to your knees subsisting on bark from a nearby tree. :) At least thats the funny image I have in my mind.
In all seriousness I know you have within yourself the ability to become everything you want to be, to yourself and others. And when I read what you write it rings true. I understand what you mean about being a foundation, and how it can prevent use from seeing, or maybe feeling the other aspects of life that are just as important. We are all seeds in the eyes of the earth, and all babies in the arms of mother Gaia. Sometimes knowing that we are the most helpless of things in the universe and accepting it allows us to be turely free.
I can't help but feel love and awe and happiness at where you and ing are going.
P.S. I can't wait to see you guys in KL to learn from you and share with you and grow with you. xoxo.
Woot woot!
Scary times make for amazing journeys and tales! Approbate yourselves to experience it openly and feel whatever comes your way. Try not to resist it so you can just let things be. It will always be ok. Embrace the newness and allow it to be exciting and scary and peaceful and liberating.
Keep living, loving, breathing, and believing!
I'll be thinking a lot about you... and not only during the moments of plopportunity.
xoxo,
-CZ
Chutzpah to spare!
I just wanted to leave a note to tell you how much I enjoy reading your travel blog. You two are brave people to take this adventure at all - but your level of self-awareness and desire for personal growth is astounding. I have done a bit of solo travel and it is pretty amazing/challenging/fun.
Robin
Connection
Your speaking my language brother! I feel that all of those things you had said are so true. I also believe that it is being able to find happiness in any curcumstance and doing everyday chores. Any new day that we get on this planet is a gift and should be enjoyed! Keep livin and inspiring us!