LA STORY!
Trip Start
May 09, 2005
1
4
25
Trip End
Ongoing
UK, NY, LV, LA... Part 3,
United States
Monday, May 23, 2005
It's weird, LA was the one place that I wasn't really looking forward to, or had no expectations, but it turned out to be superb! We got a glimpse of how big LA is from the plane -- it's big alright! After a fairly long shuttle ride in rush hour, we made it to the hostel. We stopped there for a second and then went out to look explore. It was weird, the street we were on was full of designer shops and everyone who walked past was seriously hot, and then we came to a restaurant, which had just opened. They welcomed us in and after realising we were English seemed really keen to talk to us -- which we hadn't had anywhere else in the US. It turned out the guy working there had moved out from England 13 years earlier to become an actor -- a common theme everywhere we went (yet here he was working in a restaurant), and he had been in a few things before. Anyway, after a few strong beers and talking to all the staff (more people than we had spoke to before in the whole of the US), who said we should check out Sunset Buluvard, we headed back to get changed and then get pissed. So after changing we headed to a place just around the corner from our hostel, The Improve, which had loads of pictures of famous comedians, who must have played there ages ago, and that's when we met our first real character...
MIKE (he deserves his own paragraph) It's hard to explain just how annoying Mike was; he was someone who struck up conversation with us for about half an hour, and in that time we said nothing, except maybe "Ye-", "N-", "Rea-".
1. A Road With Some Cars Parked Either Side
Possible the most self obsessed man in LA, and therefore the world. It was brilliant because he would ask you a question and as you go to answer him he would answer for you with another story about how good the 70s were / how many women he'd slept with / how many important friends he had, and then break into the gayest laugh... Anyway, he invited us out, and before we could answer he asked us where we were going, we in turn VERY QUICKLY replied a restaurant that had just opened down the road -- at which point he said "what's is called?", "don't know, it's a new restaurant and we din't get the name" we replied. "what's it called?". "don't know it's only just opened". "What's the restaurant called?"... This went on for awhile and then we managed to leg it from Mike, who was still talking as we left. But that's what coke does to you...Anyway, after that we went back to the restaurant ("what's it called?") and then headed up to Sunset B. Enter the O.C., or Beverly Hills 90210 for the older ones reading this (Rooney / Dafyd!). It was fantastic, every place we went to was loaded with fitties and we only had to speak within earshot of them, and we'd get "hey, are you from England?", or sometimes "hey, are you from Australia?", and that was our night basically -- talking to young aspiring actresses all night... well, sort of... we spoke to a few, the rest of the time we had to make do with the over-the-hill aspiring actresses, or worse -- Australians! Anyway, it turned out to be a fantastic night, and we had entered a world that we'd like to return to with shed loads of money!
The next day, hungover, we tried to walk to the beach.
2. Baywatch
For some reason we got the impression that it was just a few miles "down there" from the ex-English guy from the restaurant. Yeah, try 26 miles! With no water, we made it 2 miles and nearly died of dehydration! We did just about manage to hail a cab and then went down to Santa Monica, which looked just like a set from Baywatch. Tried to play some volley-football on the beach, but my feet were close to bleeding on the scorching sand. Then went for a quick dip in the sea, but my legs were close to bleeding from all the chaffing. Now I've always thought I'd be calm in dangerous situations, but when I got back on the beach and sat down I realised I wouldn't. I looked back and saw some fins bouncing in the water -- SHIT SHHHAAARRRKKKS, I thought, and nearly screamed it too... before realising they were dolphins! So after admiring the dolpins and getting some grub, we got a taxi ride to Universal Studios, as I heard it was good there. Boy, did we get stung. The taxi ride turned out to be a lot more expensive than he said, and when we got there we realised we didn't have enough money to go in!! (Well, we kind of did, but that would have meant not enough to go out later -- and we wanted to go to Sunny B. again). So we got a taxi to Hollywood, walked the walk of fame and then went to Hooters for some cheap food and beer. We stayed there most of the night and watch the Trinidad Vs Wright fight and had about 8 pints of the weakest / most watered down beer in the world (we walked out of there more sober than when we walked in). Anyway, our hostel was not too far away so we caught a taxi there and then headed out. It wasn't as good as the night before, but it was still okay. The next day we went to a tiny market where I had a hot dog that nearly broke my dog's belly, then walked up Melrose Boluvard, where we were passed hundreds of attractive young girls out spending daddy's money, which was great. Then we had to get a shuttle to the airport, as we had a plane to catch to the Cook Islands...JFT: Had such a cool first night! Everyone was really friendly and REALLY attractive -- in fact, me and Giggsy really brought the place down! The only problem it IS really hard and expensive to get around without a car, but having said that, we could have used the bus at least once! Gutted we both ran out of money towards the end, but all in all LA was wicked. It would be perfect if you could move everyone from LA to New York and have the Vegas weather... but leave that twat Mike where he is!
