When Your Fears Subside and Shadows Still Remain

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  Phnom Phen, Cambodia
Monday, March 13, 2006

J: We bused from Siem Reap to Phnom Penh, where we didn't think it would be possible, but it was actually hotter. It was strange arriving. The streets in the area we stayed in were mostly dirt or just seriously covered in dust and there was a lot of construction going on and torn up streets and sidewalks. We decided we would get right on the sightseeing and took a tuk tuk to S-21, the main prison run by the Khmer Rouge. It is now a museum/memorial to the prisoners. The prison was originally a school, which the Khmer Rouge converted into a prison, adding brick walls in the classrooms so that prisoners had these tiny (I think they said something like 2-3 foot by 6 foot) cells. They have left the majority of these intact and have set up some exhibits in some of the classrooms that were used for torture and holding larger groups of prisoners chained together by their ankles.

So when we first arrived we went to watch a movie, which we thought would give us some background and maybe some insight into what we were about to be seeing. It was by far the worst documentary I have seen. It was already a few years old and jumped around a lot without really giving much historical context or continuity at all. It was really disappointing and too long and really challenging to understand the narration. Plus we were sitting on these really uncomfortable benches in this dark hot room. It looks like they are really still working on improving the museum, which hopefully will be a lot better in the coming years. There was very little information explaining the pieces of the exhibits. The strong and most moving parts of the museum, for me, were the various photo exhibits by both local and international photographers/journalists. There were three, which were all quite different and gave a much more interesting perspective both historical and visual than most everything else in the museum.

M: As has been a theme for me, I wish I had gone into Phnom Penh with a bit more historical knowledge. I was also a little disappointed that the museum didn't shed more light on the time of the Khmer Rouge and S-21. The thing that was actually a bit weird about the museum was the fact that it felt so far removed from the actions of 30 years ago. It was like visiting Dachau where all of life had resumed around it and it felt like nothing had happened there. Obviously, this is how a people heal themselves, but it feels a bit strange to be some place so severe that is now a museum where people are playing soccer behind the barbed wire main building and there is a vendor selling iced Fanta in front of the main entrance. (J: I completely concur.)

J: After this we went to check out a couple of movies being shown through a cafe that had been recommended to us by a couple of friends. So we arrived at the cafe and told the people there that we were going to stay for both movies (each about 40 minutes long with about 20 minutes in between). We arranged with one of the servers to order before the first movie so we could eat during the little intermission. Everything seemed great. We got out of the first movie and they sat us at a table that looked like it had been set just for us. And then we waited for about 10 minutes before they brought our food. I have to back up for just a minute. When we first arrived at the cafe we were checking out the food and feeling a bit disappointed with the menu and the price of everything. But then Missy noticed that they had a veggie burger. For some reason I had sort of been craving one for the past few weeks (even though I am pretty opposed to eating food from home when I am traveling internationally), so I got really excited and decided we should just eat there. Okay, so back to our food finally coming after 10 minutes. Our food comes and at first I just think that the veggie burger must be hidden by all the veggies (cole slaw, actually). But actually not. There wasn't actually a burger, veggie or otherwise, at all. My "veggie burger" consisted of a really fat bun and some cole slaw. Hilarious! I mean, now I can laugh, because seriously that is some funny stuff. At the time I was pretty disappointed and then annoyed as our server came over two minutes later to rush us to pay and get upstairs for the second movie--I was NOT amused.

But despite the veggie burger and rushed meal incident, overall I was glad we had gone to see the movies. The first was history on the Khmer Rouge, very informative. The second was about land mines in Cambodia--also lots of good information.

M: We hired a tuk tuk driven by this hilarious guy named Lucky (well, that's the English translation of his name) and got going early in an attempt to beat the 42C heat. Our first stop was the Killing Fields, which was a very dusty, bumpy ride. Like S-21, the area around Cheung Ek is fully lived on with a primary school and houses and people going about their real lives. I don't know why I expect that these areas are going to be forever quarantined, but there's something so surreal about it for me. I kept saying to Jessie that when the Khmer Rouge was at its peak was right around my birth, so many of the signs and events we were seeing seem particularly strange. I mean, they were, for all intents and purposes, within my lifetime. Ancient history seems easier to swallow. How can we still be this horrific to each other? Although, now that I've said that, I can think of several examples since the Khmer Rouge of genocide, but I'm going to avoid that soapbox.

The Killing Fields consist mainly of the mass graves with a smattering of bones on the sides and a large stupa in the middle of the field with bones, skulls and clothes as a tribute to the victims. One of the particularly disturbing parts of the visit was the group of children led by a young girl who followed us begging for money. Money "to share" between them.

We left the Killing Fields and went to the Royal Palace. The grounds were beautiful and some of the buildings were incredible. It was obviously immaculately maintained and there were large areas to which tourists were not welcome. (J: Huge contrast from the Killing Fields and the poverty and desperation of those children.) We wandered around admiring the beauty of the buildings and the many, many Buddhas as the day grew hotter and hotter. Our next stop was the National Museum. At first, we felt like it was going to be another museum of tiny Budda figurines, but there were some excellent sculptures and wonderful photographs and a few plaques that actually offered explanations. From there, we ate lunch at Lucky's favorite local restaurant. A VERY busy, but delicious place without a menu or English speakers, which was fun. We made a quick stop at the market, but it was really too hot to enjoy ourselves. So we spent the rest of the day lounging, reading, writing in our journals, talking to the other people at the guesthouse and getting ready, with anxious anticipation, to go back to Bangkok and meet Mom! And we gleckel on...

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