Vietnamese culture
Trip Start
Feb 17, 2007
1
13
53
Trip End
Sep 06, 2008
Saigon,
Vietnam
Friday, May 25, 2007
Some of you have inquired about two topics which escaped my radar. Not true. I deliberately tried to avoid them.
Safety. Simply put, negotiating the traffic in Vietnam is a risk manager's nightmare. The margin of error between safety and disaster is customarily small. To hopefully put your minds at rest, I am always cognizant of my immediate surroundings. The first thing I show my passengers, Day 1 Hour 1 of every tour, is how to cross the road.
There is a specific clause in my contract prohibiting any kind of motorcycle riding. In case of such an accident, my insurance and employment would be voided. I enjoy my health and will protect it for personal and professional reasons. For those of you who are still skeptical (and boast an iron stomach) skip on down to the postscript.
Yellow Fever. My manager caught it. Most of the tour leaders have caught it. Many Vietnamese ask me when I'll catch it. Inquiring minds want to know. And Vietnamese most of all! How can a single, foreign man can travel throughout this country without a nice, young Vietnamese girlfriend? If only I had a nickel...
The idea of a companion does sound appealing sometimes. But most Vietnamese girls want marriage. Looking beyond that leaves only one option: prostitutes.
On one tour, I was joined by a female local guide. One of the first things she told me, quite directly, was how she was looking for a nice man. My passengers within earshot all paused to listen. I told her I was same-same. I was looking for a nice man too. Later that day we were eating lunch in a room full of tour leaders and local guides. At the next table were two young men smiling intently at me through the whole meal.
While shopping in a store, a single female vendor asked me if I was married. I try to be truthful and straightforward. But this time followed the advice in my guidebook and lied. What's her name? Where is she now? Why? How many children do you have? Why not? When? Each question became increasingly painful.
So...my next strategy is to deflect the attention. When older females ask me if I'm married yet, I'll nestle right next to them and ask in Vietnamese, "Why? Do you want two husbands?" They may laugh but that still doesn't deter them. In Vietnamese culture, family is paramount. Getting married is always the best day in their life.
Finally, I just tell them I'm not lucky. In Buddhist cultures, that's usually interpreted as bad karma. So they want to know why. I brush my forearm and tell them in Vietnamese, "I am same-same monkey."
The question still stands - "do you want to get married?" I used to say 'no'...but not anymore. A male local guide clued me in. 'No' is used by playboys. 'Not yet' ('chua' in Vietnamese) somehow ends all discussions. And the phrase I learned the fastest since arriving.
Previously, I mentioned some of the reasons I like living and working here: the people, culture, cuisine and climate. A few more:
Safety. May sound funny to hear this again but violent crime is rare. I have yet to hear about an assault or hate crime. Families let their toddlers wander around freely. The biggest danger is petty theft, for example, having your wallet lifted. Understandable when you consider the average Vietnamese makes only $400 a year.
Affordability. Many 'luxuries' back home are now part of my routine. Most automobile taxi rides are less than $2. A legitimate massage reeeeeally helps me de-compress after a tour. Can you believe they begin at $8 an hour? One of the female tour leaders persuaded me to get a pedicure during the Tet holiday. Today I ventured for my first facial. They won't all stay in my budget but still fun to try at least once.
Spirituality. A Buddhist here asked me if I knew the best medicine. I shook my head. Happiness. The more I toss that around the more it rings true.
Next, My Tho
Tam biet,
Eric
PS Last week I was riding a bus to a training seminar. Along were several tour leaders and managers. When the bus slowed down, I saw a mannequin lying on the road. After a few glances I realized it was a real person dressed in a suit on his way to work. The face was distorted and discolored due to a large open wound on the back of his skull. The visual brought back memories of JFK. Many senior employees of the company said, with a straight face, that it was one of the worst moto accidents they had seen. So...I turn down free moto rides for the safety of an auto taxi.
