Ode to a Lost Love

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Trip Start Jun 17, 2008 Previous
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  Auckland, North Island, New Zealand
Sunday, January 25, 2009

Ode to a Lost Love

As dawn arrived, my arm brushed against her breast,
Electrifying memories drowned me, powerful as a tsunami crest,
Our romance was magic, intense, overflowing with lust,
But like a Shakespearean tragedy, our oneness was destined for dust,
The sights, the sounds, full mountains topped with snowy lace,
I look into my soul and glimpse nothing but her exquisite face,
I can still see glacier melt tears stream down her smooth cheek,
But it's time to move on, to the future I must peek,
Perhaps all is not lost for the broken-hearted man that is me,
After all, Australia beckons, and I am as easy as can be
© Kevin Elop, 2009...soon to be a Major Motion Picture Starring Tom Cruise

Yes, it's time to say goodbye to New Zealand

It Was True Love

.  Our 7 week love affair has ended, but with the promise that we will remain friends. (I really mean it this time, honest!).  If you are a regular reader I'm sure you already know that we have thoroughly enjoyed our time here.  While the Egyptian bus terminal toilets were unforgettably fragrant, and Sarah's Peruvian altitude sickness was stunningly colourful, no country has consistently overwhelmed our senses like New Zealand.  Before closing off the New Zealand chapter of our journey, however, I suppose I should hit on the highlights of our last 10 days here:
·    Learning the subtle differences between the facilities at a "backpacker hostel" and those at a "holiday park" (which caters more to campers).  The motels at Fox Glacier were overpriced (and full) so we decided to try the local holiday park.  The owner offered up a six-bed room in one of their group cabins with shared kitchen and bathroom facilities...besides the eerie feeling that we were witnessing our future, 30 years hence ("I'm sure you'll like your stay in our group home, dear"), it sounded good to us, and the price was right.  Subtle difference #1 arose as we entered our assigned room and noticed the lack of bedding...apparently, the campers that generally stay at holiday parks have sleeping bags.  As we started making dinner, subtle difference #2 was discovered:  holiday parks, unlike backpacker hostels, don't supply pots, pans, dishes and cutlery.  With an open package of ground beef in one hand, and uncooked pasta in the other, Tracy's new vision of "raw" spaghetti was somewhat unappetizing (meanwhile, I gleefully rubbed my hands, danced a jig, and sang "Bring on the Pop-Tarts!!").  Alas, both issues dissolved (as did my dreams of savory Raspberry Sprinkle pastry treats) as bedding and a kitchen set could be very cheaply rented.  And by the way, subtle difference #3 was the large roaches that were prevalent in the holiday park.  No, scratch that, some of the backpacker hostels offer up those little treats as well...chocolates on the pillows, not quite;

·    Fox Glacier and Franz Josef Glacier...visiting these glaciers, which by the way are both currently advancing (take that Al Gore!), was very enjoyable

Rugged New Zealand

.  We have always found glaciers to be visually appealing (and good fodder for poems), but what made these different was that we could approach both by hiking up the huge rocky stream beds that had been carved by earlier glacier incursions...very neat.  As a safety note, visitors should take the "Danger, do not pass these barriers" signs seriously.  The week before our visit to Fox Glacier two brothers (in their 20's) decided they wanted to go well past the safety barriers and touch the glacier.  Unfortunately, as is a regular occurrence with glaciers, a few tonnes of ice fell from the glacier's face.  We were told that one of the bodies will be forever entombed in this advancing glacier.  By the way, can you spot the people in these glacier pictures (who are on organized walks)?;

·    Staying at Barnacle Bill's Seaside Inn...we just liked the name;

·    Beautiful Abel Tasman National Park...visiting this park entailed a trip on a water taxi which was a thrill ride in itself (by my standards, anyway) through the rough surf.  With the amazing beaches, stunning blue water and deep green surrounding forest, I can't imagine anything more scenic;

·    Chuckling over some of the towns we drove through

Fox Glacier

.  This included Bulls, where every second sign was a play on the town's name.  For example, the Dollar Store was called "Afforda-bulls", a confectionary was called "Delecta-bulls", and we even went through a police spot check where a locally called "consta-bull" made sure we were wearing seat belts.  [New Zealand Educational Point:  If I had a beer in my hand at the spot check the consta-bull would have still said "No Worries" as long as I wasn't drunk...consuming alcohol in public or apparently while driving a car is legal here - go figure].  Next up was the town named National Park (population: 460), not to be confused (or perhaps intentionally to be confused) with the actual National Park that is further down the highway.  And then there was Whakapapa which on the surface seemed normal until you discover that Whakapapa is a Maori word, so the "Wha" should be pronounced as "Fu"...go ahead and say it out loud.  I'm not making this stuff up.  And I didn't even mention the city that had a 50 foot statue of a carrot welcoming you to the town...if you're interested, their Carrot Festival is held in July;

·    Not to be outdone by the town names, the local rocks decided to step up.  Last week we saw the Pancake Rocks along the west coast, Split Apple Rock in Abel Tasman park and the newly named BaRock Obama.  (Oddly enough, despite being pounded by erosive waves for millions of years, only just last month it emerged as the spitting image of the new American president*)

·    Hiking in Tongariro National Park, which included Mt

Franz Josef Glacier

. Doom from the Lord of the Rings movies, as well as some other still active volcanoes (and no, I didn't really try to drop my wedding ring, Frodo-style, into Mt. Doom.  Although Tracy threatened to - maybe I wasn't having one of my more patient days!)  We were based in the aforementioned town of Whakapapa.  It's not just the pronunciation of this place that is a little warped.  Whakapapa is a historically dangerous area with more than its share of erupting volcanoes, lava flows and earthquakes.  Also adding to the injury tally, many visitors come to climb the snow capped mountains, go white water rafting, or take multi-day treks through/over the volcanoes, all with the town's blessing.  When checking into our holiday park however, we asked about a playground...apparently the town elders are okay if you get incinerated by a lava flow or fall off a mountain, but they deem playgrounds to be too dangerous.  (Tracy just shook her head and muttered "Whakapapa" under her breath when she heard that news);

·    The discovery that a certain amount of advance planning is sometimes helpful.  As we worked our way back up the North Island towards Auckland for our Australian flight we had planned to stop in a place called Lake Taupo.  As we drove into town we were surprised to see all of the outlying motels with their No Vacancy signs displayed, so we headed directly to the holiday park for some dorm beds

Abel Tasman Park

.  Adding to our surprise, we were presented with some exorbitant prices (i.e. 3X the norm)... "You did know the Lake Taupo Formula 1 Grand Prix is always held this long weekend, didn't you?"  Hmmm, so you're telling me that a combination long weekend and Grand Prix event (in a town that is already known for its summer time lake activities) has caused a problem with vacancy rates?...Who would have thought??  But fear not, loyal reader...we pulled out our map and saw that the next "major" town was the geothermal Rotorua (aka Stinkyville), where we had stayed before Christmas.  Sarah's eyes lit up as she exclaimed, "We're going back to Fartopia?!"  It was amazing (or just plain sad) to see how excited we were to be going back to a town we were already familiar with (even if it does smell like rotten eggs).  We even got a deal on our motel room because the owner remembered how good Laura was with her dog.  And I got to return to the best honey-hole of free wireless access I've ever found in New Zealand.  You've just gotta love this place;

·    Speaking of Lake Taupo, one of the reasons we wanted to go past this lake (which, if you're interested in useless trivia, is the size of Singapore) was that we were told it had pumice rock floating in it.  No sooner had I muttered, "I don't see no stinkin' pumice" when Tracy pointed out a floating rock...very neat (yet again), and we now have several choice pieces in our trunk

View From Abel Tasman Hike

.  I'm already wondering what we're doing dragging rocks along with us on this trip (even if they are light).  Somewhere along the way I'll have to teach Tracy the difference between light and compact;

·    And I'm happy to report that on our last day in New Zealand we became honorary Kiwis by walking barefoot in The Warehouse store, just like the locals.  I guess we'll treat any nasty fungal infections we picked up when we get to Australia.
 
Time for a little intermission quiz.  Examine the picture labeled Exhibit A and try to guess which of the following two statements is more accurate:
1.  I have learned to give Tracy and her camera an intense icy stare while bungee jumping, and also while wearing a helmet normally only seen at the luge track; or

2.  We have been playing with our photo editing software under the misguided notion that we could trick people into believing that I was really a cool Kiwi extreme sports dude...bonus points if you can spot, and read, my new tattoo.
 
Okay, back to the serious part of the blog

Oops, I Dropped My Ring

.  In looking back at our 7 weeks in New Zealand, the natural attractions were clearly a significant contributor to our enjoyment here; but we have also kept a "Things We Like About New Zealand That Aren't Scenery Related" list.  It includes the following:
·    A sticker on the dash of the car to "Keep Left" and directional arrows painted on the road as you leave tourist sites.  A little positive reinforcement that I really should be on the left hand side of the road is always nice.  Perhaps the Kiwis should take this concept a little further with periodic signs that say "Hey Kev, You've Been Driving Here for 50 Days Now ...Isn't It About Time You Stopped Drifting Off The Road On The Left?".  [btw, I have no idea which one of my psychological problems causes me to consistently drift to the left...maybe it's something to do with Stephen Harper and George Bush];

·    Well-marked, and very clean, public toilets on the main roads in most towns...no elaboration required;

·    Unlike Egypt, we didn't need the assistance of a local to cross the street in a major city.  In fact, they have crosswalks everywhere and the drivers actually stop for the pedestrians...a novel concept;

·    The weather forecasts are amusing.  At home we have grown accustomed to a lot of detail including the precise temperature, wind chill, chance of precipitation, etc.  From what we have seen and heard, the Kiwi weather forecasts are either "Fine", or if there is a chance of rain, "Mostly Fine"...we have literally heard one word weather forecasts on the radio. 

·    I know I've mentioned this before, but we really like the fact that all the advertised prices already include taxes

Exhibit A

.  Maybe some of you would disagree but I like knowing that the a can of Coke with a $1 price tag on it actually costs $1, instead of $1 + 8% provincial tax + 5% federal tax + 1% recycling tax + 0.75% gas tax. [Note: no gas tax on the non carbonated drinks];

·    The friendly and nice people in New Zealand.  This includes the guy at the Bluebridge Ferry Company who repeatedly apologized for the fact that I had incorrectly booked the ferry going in the wrong direction..."Don't let me do it again, dude!"  This also extends to the behavior of drivers when two lanes merge into one...there is a road sign of a zipper, and the cars actually merge in this manner without fuss;

·    A can of "Craig's Bean Salad Mix"...add some red and green peppers, onions, and some feta cheese...delicious (with thanks to cousin Janet for that one).  [New Zealand Educational Point:  Peppers (of the red, green, yellow and orange variety) are called "capsicums".  I don't know why but perhaps in the Maori language, the word "capsicums" is pronounced "peppers"];

·    The children's playgrounds...forgetting the "Whakapapa anomaly", the playgrounds here are amazing in their number and scope.  They are also "extreme" with their vast variety of spinning, sliding and whirling attractions.  My personal favorite was the pentagonal swing set.  Instead of having five swing seats side by side, each seat is on one side of the pentagon and they all swing inwards and meet in the centre...it turns into a full contact sport.  And speaking of swings, we witnessed a number of children swinging quite high and then doing backward somersault dismounts...we have decided that Kiwis train their children young so they are ready to join adults, like me, in grown-up extreme adult sports like Photo Shop bungee jumping;  By the way, Michael was the photographer of the great picture of Tracy ziplining..

Mount Ruapehu, Tongariro National Park

.
 
And I guess it is only fair that we also share our "Things We Didn't Really Like About New Zealand, In Addition to the Lack of Bears and Moose Roaming Freely About" list:
·    The big blue-eyed eels staring at us on our Matheson Lake walk near the Fox Glacier...freaky;

·    The fact that eggs are not refrigerated in the grocery stores...we found this troubling, but not so much that we didn't feed them to our children;

·    The number of birds that are too slow to move off the highway...as we have documented in previous blogs I have found it difficult to actually get up to the posted speed limit with all the hills and sharp curves but I have still managed to hit and kill at least 3 birds (including 2 in one 30 minute stretch);

·    Sandflies, which seem to be a cross between black-flies and mosquitoes.  Annoying little critters, and it brings us to our next dislike...

·    The lack of screens on the windows

View from Water Taxi, Abel Tasman

.  Besides the sandflies, they grow some honking big house flies here as well, and they like to buzz around my head when I'm trying to go to sleep...I know, cry me a river!;

·    And if you are a regular reader it goes without saying that I am definitely not pleased with the diligence Kiwis display when it comes to securing their wireless networks.
And finally, through a superhuman effort just before press time (belch), we were able to finish our Cadbury chocolate tasting research.  It was an onerous task that added five pounds to my waist, but, quite frankly, you're worth it.  And, if you ever make it to this beautiful country, you won't have to bother tasting the likes of Rocky Road and Tiramisu.  So, now for the results...although the Energy Scroggins was my personal favourite, the kids liked Lemon Cheesecake, Old Gold Peppermint, Chocolate Fudge Brownie and Dream the best.  There you have it.  Don't worry, you can thank me later.  
 
So that's a wrap on New Zealand, and now it's on to Australia.  Look out, Nicole.  My heart is broken, and I'm lookin' for love...
 
 
* Okay, I might have taken some liberties with this one. 

Post your own travel photos for friends and family More Pictures

Tandem Reverse Somersault	Full Contact Swinging	Tracy Ziplining at the Playground	Pancake Rocks
On the Road to Fox Glacier	Another Glacier View	Tongariro National Park	Taranaki Waterfall
Mt. Ngauruhoe: Mordor's Mount Doom	Evil Blue Eyed Eel, Fox Glacier Area	Yeah, We're Kiwis!

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