Oh Idaho
Trip Start
Aug 08, 2008
1
17
Trip End
Ongoing
Driggs,
Idaho,
United States
Thursday, December 4, 2008
Here I am in Idaho. It has been (and continues to be) an incredibly hard landing and transition back to life stateside. I don't know why exactly (maybe it's unexpectedness?) but intra-US culture shock is very intense for me, probably much more so than anything I felt in my travels abroad. Sure, moving from Kentucky to Africa was hard, but nothing will ever compare to the move I once made from Arizona to Kentucky. Who knows why going to Mexico felt like a homecoming, but being in Idaho feels like I've landed on an alien planet?
Can't remember where I even left off last, but suffice to say, the last week or so of my travels was wonderful. I absolutely loved Peru. One of many highlights was the 12-hour Chiclayo-Lima bus ride on a double decker bus (I rode on the top level)... and, as if that weren't cool enough, we were served (hot!) breakfast and lunch (Peruvian-fied Chinese food), all the movies were English-subtitled, and mid-afternoon all passengers participated in a bus-wide game of bingo. It's the only way to travel, I tell ya!
My last 24 hours in Mexico were a whirlwind. I remember being giddy and bouncing down the Mexico City airport terminal after many, many hours of exhausting travel, chanting/sing-song-ing in my head "Mexico makes me happy! Mexico makes me happy!" I had a couple of tortas ahogadas in Guadulajara, trying to enjoy and consume as much Mexican food as possible before leaving the country... lime juice and salsa on everything!
Getting back to Arizona involved a long, long time on a bus. Lots of middle of the night checkpoints too. By the time I arrived in Nogales, I was starving, exhausted, and very restless and anxious, but only an hour's drive away from Tucson... theoretically. But between waiting on another bus and border formalities, it took me about 5 (excruciating) hours.
I had a really interesting first couple of hours back in the US. The bus from Nogales dropped me off in a part of South Tucson that I didn't recognize at all. And while I would have known exactly what to do if I were still in Mexico, there in Tucson, the closest thing I have to a hometown (and really, probably one of the closest places to Mexico outside of Mexico), I couldn't even find a working payphone. No buses, no internet cafes, no taxis to flag down... completely unlike any other country I've ever been in. It was dark, I had my luggage, and I started walking. By blind luck, I found a Sun Tran bus eventually (quite an intense way to re-acclimate to American life, really), rode it into familiar territory, and ate an Eeggee (to reclaim my Tucsonan identity).
Unfortunately, I only had about three days in Tucson. Most of it was spent unpacking from Mexico, and immediately repacking for Idaho. To be honest, up until about three weeks ago, I hadn't put much thought into this winter. It never occurred me that I'd need special clothes for snow or for work, for example (apparently t-shirts don't aren't universal apparel), but knew I was in trouble when I was freezing cold while I was still in Arizona. Luckily, my parents were there to help me, and my dad even drove me all the way up to Idaho.
And where to even begin writing about my new life here?
I live in a town with one stoplight. A town with a population of 1100. It's a loveable place, definitely, but an adjustment. I thought I knew small towns from Kentucky, but, believe me, this place takes small to a new level. The day my dad and I drove into town, there was a herd of cattle strolling down Main Street (also a state highway). There's a beautiful grocery store, but it's a 2 mile walk from my apartment (I don't have a car here) and is closed on Sundays... walk in the door, and, randomly, you'll be greeted by two Japanese men preparing sushi.
There's a huge Mexican immigrant population here, and while I was originally very excited about that (hoping to make friends, continue using my Spanish, indulge in the Comida Mexicana I've come to love, etc.), it has probably been the hardest thing about moving here. I see racism everywhere I look, and it's eating away at my soul. It wasn't even a month ago that I was a foreigner, and I vividly remember the kindness and hospitality of my hosts, particularly in Mexico. To the see the situation reversed in every way is literally making me sick.
To be honest, I want to go home. While I can appreciate it, I'm not particularly endeared with the snow, the mountains, with my job, or with small town life.
I'm getting too old and too tired to be miserable, I don't have anything to prove to anybody at this point, and while I'm sure I could gain something valuable from sticking around Idaho, I don't doubt that there are other lessons elsewhere. Life is hard here, and I'm not sure it's all together "worth it."
Still, part of me wants to stick around. Part of me wants to try to make a difference. Start an intercambio program, for example- a Mexican-American cultural and language exchange... small things. We'll see.
I started formal training for a marathon (the full 26.2 miles) on Monday. Running in the cold is a new experience (who knew my face could generate so much liquid?), but so far so good. Had to take a couple days off because I came down with a fever and sore throat, but I'm on the mend now. Running will make many things clearer and easier, no doubt... as I once read on a t-shirt, "running is cheaper than therapy."
Will end things for now, but I'm back on the cell phone grid, have occasional internet access, and, honestly, could use some help to make it through the long, cold winter and the reverse culture shock. Would love to hear from you. Lots of love to you all.
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