More from Guadalajara
Trip Start
Aug 08, 2008
1
13
17
Trip End
Ongoing
Guadalajara,
Central Mexico and Gulf Coast,
Mexico
Monday, October 6, 2008
It isn't easy to be sick and alone though, no matter what. Problems that come into play are mostly mental and emotional. My modus operand of being completely and utterly dependant on myself (and no one else) gets called into question when I'm sick. Knowing that my body can "fail" like this scares me deeply. If I don't have me, who do I have? Dramatic questions like "will anyone notice if I don't make it back to the hostel tonight?" surface, and thus a cold morphs to certain death in my mind. I'm the first to admit I put a lot of pressure on myself.
But hooray for fresh mango juice right around the corner.
So even though I just wrote in the blog, I thought I'd take this opportunity to say a bit more about Guadalajara and what's been going on with me.
I think I'm coming to the realization that I'm not going to be in any kind of shape to run the half marathon in two weeks, and it breaks my heart.
I've been running for almost two years, and in formal training for about four months, with a goal of running a marathon.... and I'm getting there. I run slow, but I do run, and I love it. I've gone from being able to run for no more than a matter of minutes, to being able to run 8 miles. Most of my training has been in Mexico, which has been a huge challenge- landing some place I've never been and having to find swimming pools for laps and safe places to run straight away, all while having a million other stresses common to travel to deal with- but still, I've done it.
Last weekend, I went for a 10 mile run around beautiful Parque Viveros in Mexico City. I pushed through about 12 kilometers before I decided that something was wrong. To get back to the hostel, I had to take the metro, but I couldn't hold myself up. I slid onto the floor, and got off to rest of the platform at one point. It could have been a million things (most likely not eating well), but at the end of the day, all that really matters is that I didn't make 10 miles.
Then yesterday (an 8 mile day), I went to Bosque Colomos, yet another beautiful park, this time in Guadalajara. I packed my running clothes, but quickly realized all I was capable of was lying in the grass, oozing snot.
That's how I've come to miss two long runs in a row, and have started to think that it might not be realistic or wise to attempt the Guadalajara Marathon on October 19th.
I have a little notebook where I clip out pictures, quotes, and write about my training. One of the first things I wrote in it was this:
"You'll know you're a runner when you begin making decisions about when to run based on the collaboration between your mind and body." -John Bingham
It sucks (a lot), but that's where I'm at. Could say a lot more about that, but why? Running is simple, harsh, wonderful, honest- you do or you don't, you can or you can't. Some "don't"s and "can't"s are demons, but some just are.
And I'll get there someday soon... there's a race in November in Yuma that I'm eyeing.
Meanwhile... Guadalajara.
As I wrote a couple of days ago, it's beautiful. One of the highlights thus far has been the 3-story Mercado Liberdad- think pirated CDs/DVDs, clothes, saddles and other various charro (cowboy) accessories, and lots of lots of food stalls, all surrounding a courtyard of men selling cotton candy, kids blowing bubbles, and strolling mariachis. Suffice to say, I couldn't dream up anything this good.
Even though I wasn't feeling good, I also loved the park I was at yesterday. Although there are lots of things you can do there (rent horses, run, etc.), I mostly hung out at the picnic ground. I snacked on my 7-11 provisions, sprawled out on my kanga, and watched impromptu handstands, chicken fights, games of baseball and volleyball, etc. For the first time in a long while, I didn't feel the least bit foreign. I forgot I was in Mexico, by not trying to escape.
...and there's the food. I think it would be impossible for me to find food in this city that I wouldn't love. I know that sounds exaggerated, but really... My biggest complaint is that my hostel provides a breakfast of toast, yogurt, and cereal- an issue because I've grown accustomed to buying my own "desayuno," usually consisting of high-cholesterol deliciousness like eggs and chorizo. I'm sure my heart will welcome a few days of yogurt.
I'm here for about another 2 weeks. (I'm on the search for an apartment.) On the 22nd, I fly to Ecuador to see a Peace Corps friend (from Tanzania). After a week in Quito, it's on to Peru, for a week with another Peace Corps friend (from Tucson). Then it's back to Guadalajara, a 26 hour trip to the border, a week or so back home, and on to Idaho.
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