LA / Las Vegas / San Diego

Trip Start Mar 26, 2006
Trip End Oct 20, 2006

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Flag of United States  , California
Tuesday, May 9, 2006

There's a broken heartedness that sets in when a close friend turns out to be more of just an acquaintance. Without going into the details, the past couple of weeks were a lesson in letting go, trying to let change happen without grasping for control and without confrontation, and attempting to just stay with the situation. What does it look like to be a really good friend to someone? What's it like to offer unconditional acceptance, even if that means giving a friendship so much breathing room that it no longer looks like a friendship? The only right action right now feels like just watching my mind as this progression of sadness, anger, betrayal, fear washes through me. Sitting down to write away from the crowds and traffic of Los Angeles and the blackjack tables and free drinks in Vegas has given me permission to finally put a voice to all this. There's so much more to say, but posting it on the web feels exhibitionist and self-indulgent - better to just take this to the meditation cushion.

On a lighter note, Todd and I had a great time in LA, Vegas, and San Diego. We drove around many of the neighborhoods - Santa Monica all the way down to Hermosa Beach, Eagle Rock, Hollywood Hills and West Hollywood (yeah!), Silver Lake, and Beverly Hills. If we were ever going to make our home in this neck of the woods, we decided it was a tie between Santa Monica and San Diego. Despite everything there is to see and do here, the best part of this leg of the trip was spending time with my beautiful sister, Kim, and her boyfriend, Steve, who recently moved here from Boulder. We had a rousing game of paddle ball at the beach on a very windy afternoon with the ocean waves crashing yards away. Kim and I discovered a mutual fondness for oversize margaritas and happy hour, which we indulged in several times. And we're forever indebted to Kim and Steve for letting us crash on their living room floor for 10 days. You guys rock!!!

Las Vegas was, well, Las Vegas. My family is responsible for getting me hooked on blackjack - thanks, guys! - and the biggest surprise of all came from Ranger Todd, who it turns out has had a hidden skill for the past 9 years. The guy is an absolute blackjack fiend! Knows all the rules, doesn't need the cheat card to know when to hit or double down, and wins! I was very impressed - after my fifth vodka drink - and now just find it kind of cute that he kept this secret for so many years. Going to Vegas? Todd's your man. I'll just be over there in the corner seat with my cheat card.

Aside from the gambling, we kept our minds active with all kinds of distractions - the Bellagio fountains (could watch those for hours!), Ka - the new Cirque du Soleil mega-production (a huge disappointment), Avenue Q - a Broadway musical take-off on an adult version of Sesame Street (puppets having sex!), and Zumanity - the Cirque du Soleil "adult" show that pushes all kinds of boundaries - great fun!

We took a little side trip to Long Beach and San Diego. The beautiful yachts at the marina were mesmerizing. One of my distant cousins lived on a houseboat here for years and I'm intrigued. How does one enter this world of water and waves if you have no experience living on a boat?

We miss everyone back home and look forward to a brief return in a couple of weeks! Let us know how your own journeys are progressing?
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