Big Cocks in Bangkok

Trip Start Jan 29, 2003
Trip End Feb 01, 2004

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Monday, March 24, 2003

21st March 2003:
Didn't really do a lot today or the next couple of days, but I met a few interesting people along the way. This evening I went to a bar on the end of Khao San Road called Gullivers which is rammed with Westerners. The beer is not as cheap as other places here, but still good value for money. Its a good place to come if you want to meet people or you just want to people watch, 'cos theres always something happening here, and a great vibe running through the place.
Returned to my hotel on Phrasumen Road, which is called K.S. House, and called it a day. What a boring day. The only real excuse I've got is that I was knackered after doing the all-nighter on the bus which really takes it out of you. Sort of like jet lag except different. I'm gonna move tomorrow, get a bit closer to the real action on the infamous Khao San Road.

22nd March 2003:
I wanted to wake up early to find new digs, and surprised myself at how early I did. I was checked out by half past nine, and with a back-pack in tow, heading towards Khao San Road. I did a little bit of homework yesterday on the hotel front, and made the decision it was probably not best to stick myself right in the middle of it, but just off it. This was exactly what I did. Right opposite Gullivers bar, within spitting distance of Khao San is the oddly named 'Sugar' guest House. It was the first one I came to and decided to give it a go. The fellah behind the desk tossed me a key, and told me to go to the top floor and look at this room. I did just that. Walked in, strip light in front of me, fan above me, basic bed, and an added bonus of a chair. In fact it looked remarkably similar to the room which Richard stays in on Khaosan road in 'The Beach' including the mossy netting separating the rooms, which was torn to pieces. Despite its basicness, I really liked this room. Everything worked, and there was enough space to leave stuff lying about, which I like. I took it, and it was only 100 Baht a night.
Settled into my new modest accommodation, I went for another walk along Khaosan. You can get almost anything you want here. It is really tempting, and you could easily spend a hell of a lot of cash. You can get everything from Bin Laden and Sadaam masks to copied CD's, and even minidiscs. Most of the stalls are clothing related, which means a lot of the time being stuck on the pavement as girls being girls stop and look at every single shop which may have the slightest chance of selling something they want, which is more or less anything. I had lunch in a small restaurant, which was Thai Green Curry, though I don't why I keep ordering this as every Thai meal I've had recently has been pretty dire, and this was no exception. In fact I had to get a cheese & ham sarnie just to get the god awful taste out of my mouth.
This evening I went to bar to watch United stuff Fulham, and you had to admit they looked bloody good for it. I think the Arsenal-Man U match mid April is going to be the crunch match without a doubt.
Wasn't over-impressed with this bar so I moved to another, which was a lot more lively, and roudy, and more 'my sort of bar' The best thing was it had 2 matches playing at once, yes 2: Newcastle-Blackburn and West Ham-Sunderland.
It wasn't long before a big Dutch bloke comes along and sits next to me. He's obviously pissed, 'cos hes talking really loud and slurring as much as Dutch people can. He claimed to be an architect, whoe built some Dutch football stadium, though I had my doubts. Hearing I was from England, he tells me I should be like Beckham. I tell him I'd like to be to which he replies 'I would like to be Ruud Van Nistelrooy'. Though why anyone would want to look like the lovechild of a horse is beyond me. Eventually his Thai girlfriend pulled him away and told him he had to go home, much to my relief.
I then turned round and started talking to Simon. He was an Oxford graduate and a paralegal from Redditch. Though he was actually really down to earth and I ended up speaking with him for the rest of the night. He gave me some good tips on Chiang Mai, and he also did his diving in Koh Tao, for which he had a couple of reccommendations.
A good night, and I learnt quite a bit. well you know what they say - Every days a school day!

23rd March 2003:
I found that cheap rooms don't always make comfy rooms, and when you have a mattress less than an inch thick, you realise how much you miss your bed at home.
Did a bit of shopping this morning. Acquired a hat & a couple of CD's. Then I got myself a new camera. The one I got has a flash, self timer, and looks alright, not too bulky which is just what I wanted. He wanted 850 Baht for the camera alone, though with my expert bargaining techniques, including the old 'walking away', 'I can get it cheaper down the road' kind of crap, I eventually managed to get it for 500 with a camera film. Films cost about 150, so I was really only paying about a fiver for the camera. Nice one!
Watched the grand prix at lunch, and despite the speculation and controversy of the new points system, and rules, I have to say it makes for much more exciting races. Both thissun and the Ozzy grand prix were top races, though Button chucked away a 5th place, and came 7thy. Twat!
Half way through the grand prix, it started to rain. Then it started to hammer down. Then it turned into a full blown thunderstorm. It was amazing. One of those storms, which you think was how it must have been when the Earth was created. Deafening thunder claps and rain drops the size of buckets. It didn't seem like it was going to stop, so I decided to make a run for it. I managed to use the cover of the street sellers for most of the way, but the last 50 yards I bore the brunt of the storm. I got into the hotel soaked through, and looked like I'd just been swimming fully clothed.
After drying off, I decided to go to one of the Wats. I chose Wat Cholaprathan Rangsarit, as it was closest. It was only then when I stepped into this courtyard with Buddhist monks, and monkesses strolling about quite leisurely that I realised I hadn't really seen any of the culture of any country since India. And it was amazing. You just couldn't believe that this quiet little Buddhist community was only a stones throw away from the neon lights and the non-stop party music of Khaosan road. Inside the Wat was even better. I was the only non-Thai in there, and it was quite a spectacle. There are little gold Buddhas (I presume) everywhere, with a load of them on a main stage at the back sort of guarding this huge 12ft gold buddha. There were also 10ft tall vases with flowers in. It was quite surreal actually.
All the Thais would buy some joss sticks, then light them, and put them on some kind of...I don't know, joss stick holder? And then go and prey on the big red carpet in front of the Buddha. I had a walk on the red carpet, though I didn't manage any prayers. I enjoyed it, although I was only there for about half an hour, i decided I must see more than bars and restaurants.
This evening I went into the same bar as last night to watch the footy games, and took a seat at the bar. Within a couple of minutes I was speaking to Pete, from near London, a Palace supporter, and Adam, an Aussie who has been living in London for over 3 years, and was on holiday. They weren't together.
Straight away I knew that I liked these fellahs. They were proper normal blokes with a crude sense of humour. I must get these jokes of my mind while I think of them, both from Pete:
What does a Vegetarian Maggot eat?
Linda McCartney.
& a bit dated now, but still a cracker:
Why do the BeeGees go to Cornwall on holiday?
Its the only place they can still see Maurice dancing!
So we're having a few beers, of which Pete was buying, and he tells me some of his stories: He was delayed in Heathrow, because a woman died on the plane he was on, and his train derailed in Northern Thailand leaving him upside down in a carriage. Not a lucky traveller, and you could see why he was going home 2 months early.
We decided to go up to Gullivers for a couple, which we did. And Pete was still buying, bonus!
After 2 or 3, Adam went home as he had a plane to catch the next morning, and Pete asks me what I want to do. He says he wants to go to the Soi Cowboy district, which I tell him I'm up for, and so we get in a tuk-tuk, which was the fastest I've ever been in, and even managed to do wheelies.
We got there and it was just as seedy as I expected. We have a look round, then go for some more Chang beer in one of the bars. I look round and Petes feeling this girls tits, then all of a sudden, he gets up quickly, grabs me and we're out of there. Apparently, she opened her pants, and her little fellow crept out, startling Pete, but having me in hysterics.
We then went to a ladyboy bar, where we knew what was what, and just had a beer, though I don't mind admitting it was hard to believe that all of these girls were, well blokes. Some of them were really attractive, but THEY WERE BLOKES!
We stay till it shuts and get a tuk-tuk back to Khaosan where we say our goodbyes, and wish each other luck.
I had a cracking night, and keep meeting new people, which is the huge bonus of travelling alone. Though I've a feeling I may regret this night in the morning.

24th March 2003:
Woke up this morning with an almighty Changover, my first hangover since I've been travelling, but it made up for the ones I hadn't had. I had a couple of things I wanted to do today, but I didn't feel like doing anything. And I didn't have any water. Got up groggily about 12, then went for the old faithful hangover cure, the full English breakfast. Just the job. Definitely did the trick!
Right now on with the tasks. I went to the post office, and sent some stuff home, which to my annoyance cost a ridiculous 20 quid, more than all the stuff I was sending home cost altogether. Needless to say I won't be sending anything else home other than postcards.
I needed to cheer myself up after just being raped in the post office and stell feeling the effects of the Chang still in my body. Too much blood in my alcohol stream!
So I decided to take a visit to Dusit Zoo, which was about 20 mins away. This was a Thai Zoo for Thai people which became obvious when virtually everything was written in Thai only, with the name of the animal in English, and bizarrely Latin.
I had a great time and felt like a kid again running around looking at the zebras, rhinos, snakes, tigers, lions. Though like anyone else, I found the monkeys the best without a doubt.
The reptile park is also well worth a look. After a few hours of looking at animals and listening to Aswad blasting out the speakers, I decided to call it a day, and got a tuk-tuk back.
I then bit the bullet, and ordered my visas for Cambodia, Vietnam & Laos, at the cheapest place I could find. Theres no going back now, I'm off to Cambodia!
I've already spent a fortune today, and will probably stay in and read tonight to make up for it.
And thats that, so until next time folks........
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