Melbourne & First Aid
Trip Start
Mar 17, 2008
1
4
21
Trip End
Ongoing
Melbourne,
Australia
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Flying down to Melbourne was an experience. Tiger airways is my saviour. How in the world they can let me buy a return ticket for $120 is beyond me. Arriving in Melbourne the pilot considerately noted that the 10 degree temperature outside was 'bloody cold' - an assertion I whole heartedly agreed with. I found my way to my hostel in St Kilda - a flashy modern place called Base. I would later find out that the name had more meaning than met the eye. I dumped my bags and headed into Melbourne's city center. It was cold, raining but really interesting. I could imagine hanging around there for longer and getting to know the city a little better. I wandered aimlessly for the next couple of hours, ate dodgy Indian food and stopped for coffee in one of the coolest ally way cafes.
I jumped back on the tram to St Kilda and was met in the room by two Irish guys and one Irish lass - my roomy's. They were sitting on the floor drinking a mix of goon and lift and I was promptly handed a glass. They proceeded to tell me that thanks to the bar on the bottom floor of the hostel (directly below us) I could forget about sleeping before 2am and that therefore, by default I must go down stairs to drink with them. So, after knocking off the entire cask of wine we headed down and my new Irish friends battered my with a range of drinks. It was great fun. At about midnight - after watching the spontaneous pole dancing competition prompted by the DJ - I decided that I needed to eat and sleep. I wander (maybe stumbled) out into the street and decided to take the alley way to the main drag. As I walked down the alley way two silhouettes called from the darkness something along the lines of "hello big boy, looking for a good time"... I promptly increased my walk to a jog and out into the main street. Incidentally St Kilda is the Red Light District of Melbourne. Ok then...
The next morning I had to make my way out to Gembrook with directions from the guy at the hostel "Oh shit I dunno thats in rural Vic... no idea". I caught the tram into the city. Caught the train to the end of one of the lines. Caught a bus out to Gembrook, then, after stopping at the local op-shop walked the 3km's to the accommodation. I was, of course, about 5 hours early so I sat out on the balcony and read a book. About half of the people on the course trickled in that afternoon. A mixture of teachers and outdoor ed apprentices.
The next 7 days were a bit of a blur. There was massive information overload in what would have to be one of the most valuable courses I've ever done. The people on the course were great. On the first day I went to ask Stacey whether I could check here cervical spine but instead asked to check her cervix... whoops. She suggested that I might be a bit forward and we should take things a little more slowly. It became a running joke for the rest of the course. One of the highlights was an evening scenario where I was the surprise patient. I was leading a group out to search for an injured person in the bush (who didn't exist). I fell over about a minute into trekking through the pouring rain in the bush and broke my lower leg. After an academy award winning performance my group soon discovered the bone sticking out of my leg - some pretty impressive stage make up - and went to work on treating me. The twist in the tale came when, following the instructions of the scenario, I told them that I had to pee, for real. As a side note I drank about a litre of diet coke before going out there, as we were told we actually had to pee. Chris being an older outdoor ed teacher basically told me to suck it up and hold on. I persisted over the next ten minutes. When he was taking my vitals he asked me what time it was and I responded with "about 5 minutes until I pee myself". He brushed it off. We were to make it as realistic as possible for the benefit of learning so, five minutes later and after laboured pleading that he helped me up to pee, the inevitable happened and I peed myself (hello ladies). It was disgusting. I was lying on a slight angle so it proceeded to flow down my back soaking all of my clothes and the sleeping bag they had wrapped around me. The shock on the faces of me saviors was priceless when after 15 minutes of lying in a pool of my own urine and telling them that I'd peed myself they finally looked. HA! About 10 minutes later they got to the job of cutting off my soaked clothes, changing the foam mat I was lying on and dressing me in thermals... possibly one of the most shameful proud moments of my life.
At the end off the course we farewelled one another and Stacey gave me a lift back to Melbourne. She mentioned that she had a spare ticket to the football that night - so I invited myself. Cheers Stacey. We stopped by her parents house who were very curious to meet this 'boy' that she was taking to the football. So I met the parents. We dropped my bags back at the hostel and had a couple of drinks at the bar downstairs. In a hurry to get to the football we stopped at a sushi restaurant. We finally got onto a tram somewhere into the second quarter and arrived at telstra dome at half time. We went up to where Stacey's aunty, uncle and cousins were sitting. So I met the extended family. I got the once over... more than once, by the extended family. Stacey's little cousin gave me what could only be described as death stares on multiple occasions. I would like to think it was because I barracked for the Eagles and he was a St Kilda fanatic... but more than likely he wanted to kill me because I was with his cousin. Fourth Quarter we made it down to our really, really good seats just behind the interchange bench. Apparently the first half had an amazing turn around with the Bulldogs coming back from a massive deficit. All we really saw was St Kilda getting flogged. After the game we wandered back along Melbourne's south bank checking out the Crown Casino (from the outside) then jumped on a tram back to St Kilda. We cheersed with water on the tram as the clock ticked over midnight and into my birthday. We said our goodbyes and after massively disrupted sleep I woke up and jumped back on the bus to the airport.
Next update from Canberra will be relatively soon. Still not sure whether I'll hang out in Aus or head somewhere else as yet. I'll let you know when I know.
#As a side note... I didn't tell you any details about the course otherwise I'd be killed - especially the evening scenario. Stacey reminded me of this and I promptly edited some small details to hopefully preserve my life#
Comments
Hilary-ious
Wet yourself ....... I pissed myself laughing, but there was not one to clean me up ........ I will take the line, 'I am busting' more seriously next time in class ...... maybe.