EUROPIA

  Marrakech, Morocco
Wednesday, May 28, 2008

It's been the best or times, it's been the worst of times, but by god, they've most certainly been times.
 
Bonjour, Hola and As-salam everyone,

We know, we've been incredibly slack lately in regards to our updates. Our initial plan was to write weekly, but the past month has been particularly hectic, traversing eight countries in just over a month. We've learned to say "hello", "thank you" and "two beers please" in five different languages, adjusted our watches crossing four different time zones and our passports have been stamped so many times they are beginning to look like a raver's arm after a weekend bender.
 
But we digress...
 

PROLOGUE
Keen to make a fresh start after the accommodation fiasco in London, Caroline and Chris began their assault on the Continent, starting with a few days in Paris, then boozing their way through French wine country, before skipping into Spain, partying in Portugal and then hopping over the Strait of Gibraltar into the madness of Morocco. The month-long adventure played out like a Shakespearian tale - full of compelling drama, comedy, love and tragedy.
 
So, settle in with a cup of tea and let us begin...


 
ACT I: FRANCE
The adventure opens on a rainy day on the first of May, when we met Caroline's uni mate Emily at Kings Cross Station and the three of us made the short journey through the "Chunnel" on the Eurostar train to Paris. 
 

ARC DE TRIOMPHE

We had four nights in the French capital, staying in the bohemian area of Montemartre, just up from the famous Moulin Rouge. Our days were spent wandering the quaint, terraced streets, stuffing our faces with vin rouge, pain and fromage (red wine, bread and cheese for those playing at home).  

 

PICNICKING...PARIS STYLE!

We slurped real French onion soup (coated in a layer of bread topped with melted cheese) and covered many miles traipsing across the city to check out the regular tourist sites - picnicking in the behemoth shadow of the Eiffel Tower, window shopping down the swanky Champs-Elysees, admiring the Arc de Triomphe (the largest roundabout in the world, sitting in the centre of 12 different avenues), listening to buskers while taking in the sprawling view of Paris on the steps of the Basilique du Sacre Coeur, hoping to catch a glimpse of the hunchback at Notre Dame and checking out the spot where Louis XVI and his queen, Marie Antoinette, were publicly guillotined in 1793 in the Place de la Concorde. 

 

BONER!

We also descended deep underground to the famous Catacombes. Dating back to 1810, the burial site came about after overcrowding in the city's cemeteries posed serious hygiene issues, so it was decided the bones of the dead would be exhumed and moved to a disused quarry. It was quite an eerie experience, walking along a dark tunnel for almost a kilometre, then having great caverns of the neatly stacked skulls and femurs of millions of Parisians open up before us.

 

JUST HANGIN' AT VERSAILLES

Afterwards, we took the train to Versailles, 21km southwest of Paris and home to France's most famous chateau - the kingdom's royal court for more than a century. After a picnic on the grounds, we headed inside an ambled through the grand halls, lavish bedchambers and the majestic Galerie des Glaces (Hall of Mirrors) where, in 1919, the Treaty of Versailles was signed, officially ending WWI. It had been a long day, so after leaving the chateau, we took temporary respite in its magnificent gardens, the three of us dozing on the grass in the setting sun.

 
Chris, who was still sporting a sniffle from our wet week in London, continued to fade and the next day was too sick to get out of bed, so Caroline and Em set out to take in the major tourist sights by themselves.

First stop was the "Tour Eiffel", the famous monument built in 1889 for the Exposition Universalle (World Fair) that was almost torn down in 1909 after the Paris elite branded it an eyesore, but was spared because it made an ideal tower for radio antennas.
 

VIEW FROM THE TOP OF THE EIFFEL TOWER

Apparently some 5.8 million tourists make their way to the top of the Eiffel Tower each year - most of which decided they would visit on the exact day and at the exact time as us. Despite trying to avoid the crowds by going early, we arrived to find thousands of people queuing around the four legs of the tower like some giant bum-bag wearing, handy-cam holding snake. 

IS THAT...NO IT'S JUST CAZ AND EM AT THE LOUVRE

Nearly three hours later and we were finally packed into the lift and taken to our final destination 320m above the ground. Tucking into their prepacked lunch at the very top as they marvelled at the view, Caroline and Emily agreed it had been well worth the wait.


 
 

THE MONA LISA...

Second stop was the Lourve, via the spectacular Jardin des Tuileries, complete with manicured lawns, colourful gardens, sculptures and a pond dotted with toy sailboats. 

...AND HER MANY FANS

With ice-creams in hand, it was a lovely stroll to the famous museum, where Caroline and Em admired the massive Italian impressionist paintings, the surprisingly small Mona Lisa...and the hundreds of people scrambling to catch a glimpse of her.

WINOS

The three of us left Paris on May 5, picking up our hire car and making a mammoth eight-hour drive south to Bordeaux in French wine country. We spent three days exploring the area, stopping at chateaus in the Medoc region to sample the tasty vin rouges as well as San Emillion, famous for it's stickies.
 

DE-VINE!

Having the car was a godsend, being able to temporarily do away with our heavy packs and carry a mobile pantry of all our favourite local treats. We become experts at driving on the "wrong" side, navigating France's non-English signage and making delicious smoked salmon and goats cheese rolls in the back of the car.



Our week in France had been wonderful, picture perfect and blessed with great weather. Next stop, Spain.
 

PICNICKING...FRENCH WINE COUNTRY STYLE!

Highlights:
Having the best picnic ever on the lawn, spread out like a lush green carpet, in front of the Eiffel Tower, complete with cheese, baguettes and cheap French wine
 
Caroline sampling snails for the first time (they really do taste just like chicken!)
 
Laughing ourselves silly watching Nuovelle Star - the French version of Australian Idol.
 

BAGUETTE OR NOT TO BAGUETTE, THAT IS THE QUESTION

Things we learned in...France
If you go to Paris, allow yourself at least two extra days to account for the time you will spend in queues. We calculated we stood in line for nearly nine hours during our four-day stay.
 
The French don't believe in translating anything, not even the information signs at major tourist attractions. It helps knowing a bit a French - or at least having someone with you that does (thanks Em!).
 
The French also don't believe in selling cold beer. However, we worked a way around this by popping a few bottles in the frozen goods section at the supermarket while we did our shopping and collecting them, nicely chilled, on the way out.
 
 
 
 
ACT II: SPAIN
"The rain in Spain falls mainly...well, everywhere." If anything, our week in Spain was wet; with the sky opening up almost the minute we crossed the border from Southern France.
 

PINTXOS ME!

Our first stop was San Sebastian, where we chilled out for two days. By then, Chris was quite ill with the flu so spent most of the time sleeping, while Caroline and Em caught up on their reading. At night we ventured out to try local paella and sample Pintxos, the Basque (this particular region of Spain) version of tapas. Kind of like a Spanish sushi train, without the sushi - or the train. Basically you go to a pub and the whole bar is filled with plates of nibbles, like slices of French stick topped with minced crab or sausage and sticks of prawns or anchovies and artichokes. You order a beer, take what you want and pay by the piece. It's delicious, but quite expensive, with most pieces costing around 1.50 Euro ($2.50) each.
 
After a particularly raucous night at the hostel we were staying in (about a dozen youngsters - all seemingly American Idol wannabes - murdering Red Hot Chilli Peppers and 4-Non-Blondes at 3am in some sort of banshee inspired singalong), we decided we were too old and moved on - eight hours southeast to Barcelona.
 
 

THE PICTURESQUE PYRENEES

Despite the torrential rain, it was a lovely road trip, passing through rugged countryside dotted with giant windmills and catching glimpses of the picturesque Pyrenees Mountains. We spent four nights in Barcelona, trying to fit all our sightseeing in between the non-relenting rain. With lounging on the beach out of the question, we set our sights on Barcelona's famous monuments, La Sagrada Familia and Parc Guell - both projects of the eccentric architect Antoni Gaudi.

LA SAGRADA FAMILIAR...A WORK IN PROGRESS

Construction began on La Sagrada Familia in 1882 and it is still being built, with the general guesstimate being that it will be completed in 2020. It's a stunning building, looking much like a medieval wax sculpture that will, when finished, boast 18 towers, all more than 100m high. Equally as impressive is Parc Guell, an enchanting park, originally designed to be a self-contained community with houses and shops but which eventually became a Dr Suess style playground, complete with secret caves, mosaics and surreal sculptures.


 

Another day we strolled down the bustling Las Ramblas, stopping to admire Gaudi's scaly Casa Batllo and his La Pedrera, with it's bizarre rooftop and quirky chimneys.
 

THE SNAKEWALKER

We also visited the Picasso Museum, Parc de la Ciutadella (where we saw a man taking his pet snake for a walk) and pottered around the colourful Mercat de la Boqueria food market, sampling the fresh juices and browsing stall after stall of all kinds of meats, seafood, pastries and the freshest fruit and vegetables any of us had ever seen. Had we had the inclination, we could have purchased skinned whole rabbits, sheep heads and any internal organ we could imagine.
 

WHEN ALL ELSE FAILS, DRINK SANGRIA!

And, when the rain was too heavy and the telenovelas (Spanish TV soaps) too much, we headed to the local cinema for a "version originale" screening of Iron Man - much to the delight of Chris, who had been waiting to see it since Cairo.




 

PICNICKING...SPANISH COUNTRYSIDE STYLE!

Leaving Barcelona behind, we made the exhausting nine-hour drive cross country to Toledo, an unexpected treasure, filled with hilly, cobblestone streets, tiny hole-in-the-wall bars and flowerpots hanging from shuttered windows - much more like the Spain we'd imagined than the bustling big-cityness of Barcelona.
 
Next day we moved to Salamanca, where, not surprisingly, it was still raining. Under the cover of an umbrella and dodging puddles, we hurriedly checked out the main sights - the Plaza Mayor, the Casa de las Conchas (House of Shells) and the university, complete with ornate faced of sculptures and carvings that hides a tiny stone frog that if spotted, legend says, will bring you luck in studies, life and love. With the storm clouds gathering, we disbanded the sightseeing and embarked on a "Beer and Tapas Crawl of Salamanca" - taking full advantage of the free tapas served with every glass of lager.
 
Thoroughly stuffed, we left Salamanca and, stopping to pick up a bootload of Don Simon sangria, we made our way across the border to Portugal where three was to become four.

Highlights:
Don Simon and free tapas. 'Nuf said.
 

MMMM...MEAT CAVERN

Things we learned in...Spain:
"Sunny Spain" is an oxymoron.
 
The Spanish seriously love their meat. They have caverns of dried animal carcasses hanging in their supermarkets and entire aisles dedicated to every kind of salami and chorizo you can imagine. With one exception: Spanish salami. For the life of us, we couldn't find hot salami, despite our repeated request of "picante" (hot) at the deli. Go figure.
 
Siestas should be compulsory worldwide.
 
 

THE AWESOME FOURSOME IN LISBON

ACT III: PORTUGAL
Our first stop in Portugal was Lisbon where we collected Chris' sister Laura who had flown into join us from England. We spent three nights in the capital and, by chance, we found ourselves staying in the trendy bar area of Bairro Alto so days were filled with sightseeing, scoffing sardines and siestas and our evenings with sipping sangria.



 
By this stage, Chris had fully recovered from his illness, but not before he managed to pass in back onto Caroline who began feeling quite poorly on our first day in Lisbon. However, with some limited Portuguese and a lot of dramatic hand gestures, she was able to procure enough drugs to keep even Amy Winehouse happy. Theatresports really is the universal language.
 

WHAT TARTS!

After the rain in Spain, the sun had finally re-emerged and we took the opportunity to wander around Lisbon's hilly, narrow streets, with Emily and Laura making frequent stops for their "pasteis de natas" (Portuguese tarts) fix.
 
We took a tram up the steep hill to the Alfama area, stopping at a great spot overlooking the water for beers and people watching, before heading to some local markets sprawled in the shadow of the Castelo de Sao Jorge.

PLAYING SILLY BUGGERS IN SINTRA

One day we took a day trip out to nearby Sintra, the traditional summer retreat of Portugal's kings. We had every intention of checking out the Palacio National de Sintra (with it's white cone-shaped chimneys) and possibly making the 3km trek up the hillside to the Castelo dos Mouros, but we got distracted by wine and cheese at a bar along the way and then again by cheeseburgers and beer at a great little outdoor café. Giving up on the idea of sightseeing in Sintra, we returned to Lisbon via train and opted for a siesta instead. 

 

CAPTAIN BEERGUT

On May 19 we all piled into the car and headed south to the Algarve, destination Lagos. The quaint fishing port was originally going to be our home for just two nights, but after driving through the chilled-out town and checking into our magnificent self contained apartment (complete with ensuites, a courtyard and TVs with English speaking channels) we decided to rearrange our plans and stay a bit longer.
 

We spent the next few days strolling down the promenade, soaking up some rays at the beach and drinking beer in the sun (you can have too much sangria it seems). 
 

THESE GROTTOES ARE TOPS!

One day we took a boat out to the nearby grottoes, sailing through aqua blue water to explore the dark caves. Our guide, a mad local fisherman, spent the whole time explaining to Chris the intricacies of catching an octopus. Chris was most grateful.



 

SLIDE...AND SPLASH. GENIUS!

While in Lagos, we celebrated Day 100 on the road and in honour of the milestone, we headed to a local waterpark, Slide and Splash, where we all bonded over a day of recklessness, throwing ourselves down plastic tubes called things like "The Twister", "The Whirlpool" and "The Black Hole". It was one of most enjoyable days of this leg of the trip.
 

I'LL HAVE WHAT SHE'S HAVING

Nights in Lagos were spent between the local drinking establishments, The Three Monkeys and Whytes Bar, were we sipped such delightful sounding cocktails as "Dirty Slag" and "Bloody Rectum".
 
Then, all too soon, it was time to farewell Lagos. Detouring via Seville in the south of Spain to drop off the car and have our last taste of sangria and tapas, we set sail for Morocco.
 

NOW YOU SEE THEM...

Highlights:
Splashing in the great, dark unknown on double rubber tubes on The Black Hole at Slide and Splash and flying as we tore down the "Superman".

Bellowing "Champagne Supernova" at the tops of our voices along with the entire bar at closing time at Whytes in Lagos after a night of 5 Euro pints of unnaturally coloured cocktails.
 
The pizza shop next to the sex shop next to the bakery next to the nightclub on the street outside our wonderful apartment in Lagos.
 

...NOW YOU DON'T

Things we learned in...Portugal:
Despite our repeated prayers, there was no Oporto in Portugal.
 
As well as being experts in the field of football and winemaking, the Portuguese are excellent builders of waterslides.
 
Bunches of hanging spinach can make just as attractive bar décor as any painting or lightshade.
 


 

WE'RE ON THE ROAD TO NOWHERE...

ACT IV: MOROCCO
Our arrival into Morocco came after a massive day travelling - three hours by bus from Seville to Algericas on the Spanish coast, 45 minutes across the Strait of Gibraltar by ferry to Tangiers on the top of Africa, a one-hour walk with our heavy packs to the bus station, then a two-hour bus ride through the rolling Moroccan hills to the pretty mountainside town of Chefchaouen.

 

CHEFCHAOUEN TREASURE TROVE

Dumped on the side of the road, halfway up the hillside, we made the exhausting trek up the last remaining incline on foot, barely noticing the beautiful blue buildings perched in the shadow of the great Rif Mountains.
 

TIRED AND BLUE AFTER THE TREK UP THE HILL

Once recovered, we set of to explore the medina, centred around the cobbled, restaurant-lined Plaza Uta el-Hammam. Our three days in Chefchaouen were spent wandering the tiny, blue-hued alleys and browsing tiny stalls and shops filled with colourful jewellery, aromatic spices, leather bags and silverware. At night, we feasted on tagines and plates piled high with cous cous.
 

MOROCCO: SPICY!

It was weird being back in an African country - again we had to remember to take toilet paper wherever we went and get used to waking up and falling asleep to the piercing sound of the "call to prayer". But Chefchaouen was different from Egypt. It was calmer, less crowded, more at ease. People didn't stare at us, hassle us or try to scam us. 
 

LOCAL MEN IN THEIR JELABAS

We played cards and took in the sunset from the roof of our hostel. We drank mint tea and watched the local men, shuffling along in their Jelabas (traditional dress that looks very much like the Jawa outfits in Star Wars, so much so that Chris and Caroline bought one each - nerds).
 


For the first time in a while, we were completely relaxed.
 


Then, in the early hours of the morning we were due to leave, we received a phone call to say our beloved cat, Mazzie, had passed away. We were devastated.
 
When the sun rose, we packed and made long, hard journey back down the mountainside to the bus station, doing our best to avoid the many stray cats that popped their heads through windows and doorways. It broke our hearts.
 
The following few days are a bit of a blur. That morning, we travelled four hours by bus to Fez, where Emily and Laura explored while we took refuge in our hotel room. After one night in Fez (during which Laura had to be rushed to the doctors after a rather nasty allergic reaction - possibly to food -  saw her blow up like a pufferfish), we took an overnight train to Marrakesh, where we were to spend our last three nights together.
 
It was a hard few days - with Caroline and Chris feeling too miserable to enjoy the scenery. Laura and Emily did their best to enjoy themselves, spending the days shopping in the famous souq, the Djemaa el-Fna and sampling the local cuisine. 
 

TOOTH TOUT

It wasn't until the last day, that the four of us managed to all go out together, sharing a final lunch and wandering through the markets where there were stalls selling everything from pottery to caged owls and eagles to sets of second-hand false teeth. That night we hit the main square, which at dusk comes alive with food stalls, musicians and street performers. We dined on some local fare, shared a last beer (at the one and only pub in town) and called it a night. We were to be at the airport at 6.30am the next morning to fly to Venice, while Em and Laura were to leave in the days following.
 
Morocco hadn't been the crazy party we'd imagined. With the exception of those few, peaceful days in Chefchaouen, it was a sad time. Em and Laura - we are sorry again we were so miserable and hope you still managed to have a good time. It was hard for us all. 
 

BEAUTIFUL CHAOUEN SUNSET

Highlights:
Chaouen. We still loved it despite everything.
 
Our sunset card game session on the rooftop.
 
Being fitted for our very own Jawa outfits. And no, of course we wont be having our own Friday night, "lightsaber fight nights" - as if.
 
 

KAFTAN FOR SUMMER, JELABA FOR WINTER

Things we learned in...Morocco:
Marrakesh isn't the bargain hunter's paradise we'd imagined. Next time, we'll listen to the locals in the small towns when they say to buy before we hit the big cities.
 
Hot chips are the perfect addition to a salad roll.
 
It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.
 
 



EPILOGUE:
With heavy hearts, Chris and Caroline left the dust and heat and fervent touts in Marrakesh on May 31, flying to Milan, Italy and then going overland by train to Venice. They spent three wonderful days there, before sliding across the boarder into Slovenia, where they narrowly avoided George Bush prior to cruising down to Croatia. But that's another story...
 
Until then, stay safe.
 
Love,
Chris and Caroline
 
 

P.S.
Congratulations to Hank and Nat on the birth of little Larry the First. We wish we had of been there to welcome him into the world, but very much look forward to meeting him upon our return.
 
Beck: Finally received your birthday present in Lisbon, via Southport in the UK. Thank you so much for the little treats from home. They were most appreciated - Caroline
 
Bel: Thank you again. For everything.
 
As is the way with travel, we've changed our future plans slightly so we've updated our itinerary on this blog. There's a link at the bottom of this update, so let us know if any of you will be in our 'hood anytime soon.

AWWWW...