GET IT INDIA - PART III

  Delhi, India
Monday, March 24, 2008

Namaste everyone,

We are currently sitting in the airport in Delhi - the place where we began this crazy journey three weeks ago. And with just a few hours to go before we depart for Japan, we're kinda sad to be leaving.

In our previous update, last Tuesday, we were in the picturesque little town of Udaipur, about to test our culinary skills in an Indian cooking class.

IRON CHEF INDIA

As we mentioned, our relationship with Indian cuisine hadn't been going well. Possibly betrayed by a dodgy curry in our first week, Caroline had a few trust issues. Chris, meanwhile, was over the same old masala sauce day in, day out and was ready to move on. The cooking class, however, reignited our passion for a good curry as we whipped up steaming cups of chai, creamy vegetable korma, plump potato koftas (dumplings), biriyani and fresh chapati breads.

SUCH A CHARMER

With our bellies full, we boarded the overnight train, the real "Darjeeling Limited", bound for Jaipur - the capital of Rajasthan, also known as the "Pink City". Despite our admission to first class, our journey was far less luxurious than our train trips in China. Our open "cabins" squeezed eight people in like sardines, three bunks high and nowhere but the floor to stash our luggage. We took the very top bunks, which initially seemed like a score, until we realised we were in grave danger of having either our head of feet sliced off by the dangerously low ceiling fans.



We arrived in Jaipur three hours late (excellent by Indian Standard Time we were told), and after a quick check in, we were off again to visit an orphanage for homeless and abused girls. It soon became obvious that our visit was a thin disguise for an appeal for financial support and we faced a moral crisis of sorts. We were a bit miffed that we were there merely to donate money, but didn't want to walk away from these kids and give nothing, particularly when we could help make a difference.

MONKEY MAGIC

Principle clashed with pride and in the end, we decided that no one would benefit from us taking a stand, so we browsed the handicrafts the girls were making as part of their vocational training and picked out a few little things, handed over our cash and felt happy knowing that our small contribution would help put food on the food on the table.




And then we went to McDonalds.

A MAC MADE FOR A MAHARAJA

Yes, it's almost despicable in hindsight. Debating over whether to give $15 to help homeless kids and then stuffing our faces with two large Maharaja Mac meals without a second thought. But if anything, India has completely opened our eyes to how lucky we are and how little we really need to survive. Here, no one cares about fashion or ipods or Paris Hilton. It's quite sickening to think how we live back home and the things we think matter. OK, so we're not about to burn all out belongings and give every cent we have to charity, but India had given us a bit of a wake-up call and hopefully it's wisdom that won't vanish the minute we leave.

INDIAN MOVIE CINEMA/PARTY HOUSE

After our guilt-feast we trotted next door to the Raj Mandir, India's most beautiful theatre to watch a Bollywood movie called Black and White. A three-hour epic, we think it had something to do with a Muslim guy attempting to blow up the Red Fort in Agra but with it being all in Hindi we can't be sure. Though anyone who has been to see a movie in India will know the real entertainment isn't on the big screen, rather in the bizarre antics of the enthusiastic audience who whooped and cheered throughout the film, held loud, lengthy conversations on their mobiles and generally treated the event like a regular social gathering. There was even an old-style intermission, where everyone gathered in the foyer to chow down on samosas.

TEA FOR...DRUNKS

That night was had yet another diversion from our course of local cuisine, with a tasty carb-loaded meal at an Italian rooftop restaurant. It was in typical nonsensical Indian style with spag bol served sans mince and beer served in teapots and sipped from teacups. Oh, and parmesan cheese? Never heard of it.

AN ELEPHANT NEVER FORGETS

The next day, Thursday, we took a local bus to the Amber Fort and Palace, where snake charmers and elephants lined the sweeping walls. You could take an elephant up the steep hill instead of making the sweaty trek in the heat, but our group declined as the elephant drivers (mahouts) use metal rods with sharp hooks on the end to hit the animals on the head to go faster. We heard, however, that one particular elephant took spectacular revenge a couple of years back when his mahout encouraged two Korean tourists to climb atop it's head. Not liking this at all, the elephant threw off the tourists and stamped the mahout to death. Revenge is sweet. An elephant never forgets.

SARI STREET IN JAIPUR

During an afternoon stroll through the markets outside Jaipur's fortified city walls - famous for it's endless alleyways of colourful sari shops - Caroline picked up some lovely bangles and a pair of shoes made from camel leather that she is too upset to wear because the thought of the poor camel who gave up it's skin for fashion makes her sad.

CHRIS FINDS A NEW CAREER

After two nights in Jaipur, we were off early on a bus to Bharatpur, which is really only worth visiting for the Keoladeo Bird Sanctuary, previously a famous hunting ground of the maharajas (once a hunting party shot a record 4000-odd birds in one day). A friendly cycle rickshaw driver gave us a personal guided tour of the park, where we spotted monkeys, antelope, deer, owls, tortoises and peacocks. Ever the gentleman, Chris offered to take over the cycling for the last (downhill) leg, presumably much to the relief of our rickshaw driver - not a muscular man by any means.

HIS HOLI-NESS, THE HOLI PAINT SELLER

The next day, Saturday, was Holi, one of India's biggest, and most colourful celebrations. It signifies the start of the harvesting season, but really it's just an excuse for everyone to drink and spend the day throwing paint all over each other, otherwise known as "playing Holi". The idea is that by the end of it all, everyone is so drunk and unrecognisable, that enemies become friends and forgive each other.




The entire country comes to a standstill, which makes travelling between towns quite difficult. The guests at the hotel we were staying at made a rather conservative effort at playing Holi on the lawn out the back near the pool, but in the end they looked a bit lame just standing there dabbing paint on each other's heads, so we decided instead to take a reprieve from the increasingly hot weather and go for a dip before we drove to Agra that afternoon, via yet another fort and another mosque, where you could take a piece of string, tie it to a wall and make a wish.

YEAH...IT'S PRETTY IMPRESSIVE

We arrived in Agra late on Saturday afternoon so didn't see it's most famous monument, the Taj Mahal until the next morning at sunrise. In short, it was spectacular. We had feared that having seen so many forts and palaces and monuments, the Taj Mahal would fail to impress but it truly is an amazing feat of architecture and, surrounded by lush gardens and shimmering ponds, it was a spectacular sight to soak up, particularly as the early morning light washed over it's white marble walls.





For anyone who doesn't know, the Taj Mahal is also a mausoleum, built by Shah Jahan for his favourite wife Mumtaz Mahal, who died while giving birth to their 14th child in 1631. It took 20,000 workers 22 years at a cost of 41 million Rupees (around $1,100,000) to build, with 500 kgs of gold used in the construction.

IT'S NOT AS HEAVY AS IT LOOKS

We walked through the gardens, checked out the tombs of Shah and Mumtaz and took the obligatory silly snaps of us picking up the entire monument between our fingers. An afternoon exploration of Agra, which has alternated in history with Dehi as the capital of India, took us to the Red Fort, before we boarded the "Darjeeling Limted" bound for Delhi for our last night in India.





We have now completed our loop of India's beautiful Rajasthan region.

INDIAN PUBLIC TOILET

And now, here were are. Sitting in the international departure lounge, unfazed that there is dust flying from construction going on all around us, or that our snack options are limited to a dodgy hotdog stand (selling just vegetarian hotdogs) and a tiny Chinese yum cha stand, that has run out of yum cha and is only selling water, but is still being manned by two employees, or that even here, the Indian people continue to stare at us as if we're aliens.

AN INDIAN HAIRDRESSING SALON

It might have given us cause for concern three weeks ago, but after the things we've seen and experienced during our time in this crazy country, it would take a lot more to shock us these days. India is a truly amazing place - in all it's beauty and quirkiness. We've fallen in love with the vibrant colours, the rich foods and the complex storytelling of Hinduism, and we have been deeply affected by the poverty, the hardness of life here - and the fact that the people continue to smile through it all.

BATHING - INDIAN STYLE

We may sound like we've been going a bit hard on the local bhang, but in such a short amount of time, we've both lost - and found - something of ourselves here. We're sad to say goodbye, but it's time to leave.

Chris needs beef.

So it's off to the land of sushi, sake and sumo wrestling we go...

Until next time,
Chris and Caroline xx



P.S.
John/dad: Hope you enjoy the rest of Birthday Week.
Sophie: While driving around Jaipur I spotted a school called "The Nest School" and thought of you - Caroline

INDIAN MAN-LOVE

THINGS WE LEARNED IN INDIA:
1. Expect the unexpected. Nothing ever goes according to plan, runs on time or does what it should. Ever. The general rule is to assume the opposite to what you expect.
2. It's a country of bizarre ironies - like fact that homophobia is widespread throughout the country, yet men walk around holding hands as sign of friendship. Or that sacred rats are given more than they could ever eat, while people beg for food on the streets. Or that fact that it's damn hot, yet everyone is dressed like they are expecting a blizzard.
3. Patience and a good sense of humour will help you out of all sorts of sticky situations. So will a pocketful of Rupees.
4. There's no such thing as road rules. There is an invisible middle overtaking line and cars battle for space on the roads with rickshaws, cows, camels, elephants, peacocks and dogs, yet it all seems to work in some bizarre, noisy symphony.
5. Water remains at a constant temperature. Tepid. This applies to showers, drinking water and swimming pools.
6. Despite what everyone says, you won't lose weight in India. Mainly because after a week you are so fed up the food, you start a series of unhealthy relationships with McDonalds, KFC and Pizza Hut.
7. Fortunately, Indians have a bizarre obsession with building everything on top of a hill or at the top of multiple sets of steep stairs, so you will exercise whether you like it or not,
8. Cows rule. Full stop.
9. Customer service doesn't exist. Orders will always get mixed up, you will always be overcharged and cutlery is often something that needs to be specifically requested. Ordering a Diet Coke inevitably means you will get the full strength variety - just filled up half way.
10. Always assume you are getting ripped off - 99.9 per cent of the time you are.

THE CRAPPIEST JOB EVER - ELEPHANT POO SWEEPER