Trip Start Jul 27, 2013
Trip End Aug 22, 2013

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, North Holland,
Tuesday, July 30, 2013

Where am I? What's this taste in my mouth?

As I peel open my aching eyes, a quick peripheral check seems to indicate we have made it home safely. God I think Amsterdam did a number on us last night. Oh well, gotta keep moving. We drag our asses down to the local cafe for breakfast. Surely croquettes will fix me. This doesn't turn out to be the miracle cure I was hoping for. Back to bed then.....

Take 2. The nap seems to have brought us back to some level of functionality.
The weather has set in for the day with light rain bringing down the temp as well.
We all jump on the ol faithful 9 tram and head back to our favourite little market for some more antiquing and some chips with mayonaise. Delicious!

We duck around the city all day in and out of the rain, finding shelter and quirky little shops along the way. More cheese, a sex museum and an increasing realisation that our time in Amsterdam will be too short to do everything we want to. Better make a short list.

At the top of the list seems to be going to a live sex show in the red light district, so we set about figuring how to find one. We pulled into a bar to ask where we might find such a place. Turns out we may have picked the wrong bar. It wasn't a gay bar. It was the gayest bar. We got a friendly welcome and the bar tender was happy to give us directions. Seizing on how uncomfortable the boys are in the bar, Mish decides to capitalise on that and make us stay in there for a beer. Those beers were drank rather quickly, we weren't keen on waiting for
the transsexual bingo to start. In hind sight, the gay pride flag out front, the naked gay men diorama, the picture of the tranny bingo host in the window and the place being named 'the queens head' all really should have set off the alarm bells before we entered.

So time for so good hetro fun.....
We found the Moulin Rouge which does a live sex show and other acts, 35euro each and we were ready to go, but we just had to find a couple of bars to wait until the actors were ready at 8.30pm.

The first few acts were just your standard bucks party special tricks, bananas in clackers, rope in fannies and a talented lady with a vagina that can write perfect cursive. The main act was a rather plump lady with two massive warlocks getting plowed by an impressive sized erection which she seemed to enjoy. Pretty funny, bit weird, but it was an experience!

Kebab, tram, bed. Done.
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blood13 on

By the looks don't think you would have lasted too much longer in Amsterdam.

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