Hello Dan its Joe here.
Its the 21st of December, and their ringing the last bell.
So this is christmas?
Right now im in London. Ive been here since Inverness so let me explain all the sh#t thats been goin down with da harden Aiiiiggghhht.
Last thing i said was that i got on that bus to glasgow. I arrived in glasgow got a kebab and chilled out (it was raining - as it does). Hopped on the packed out bus at 10:30 for london. It really sucked though, because there was a double decker coach from the same company next to us leaving at the same time for london. It was almost empty. But i was stuck on this single level one next to a guy that picked his nose all night. It it sucked also because I have aisle seat. I hate aisle seat. Im a window man. Ive learnt how to improvise in my travels and ive learnt how to make a window into a pillow. The aisle seat, its a uncertainty. You just dont know. You dont know if you will have leg swingage room to put your legs in the walkway. You dont know if you will have those seat pillows. You know the ones with the ears on them. Most importantly you dont know how big that arm rest is. If the arm rest is small you cant rest your body on it and sleep. Therefore, as what happened on this overnight trip. I had to sleep straight. Sleeping straight (scientific name) or as I call it Bimusicular straightenisation, involves a person sleeping perfectly straight on a chair. Now in the past I was as good as any man in this technique. But it had been a while since i last performed Bimusicular straightenisation and it showed. I didnt get much sleep at all. Also, thanks to the fact that the bus man kept waking everyone up with announcements about how to use the bathroom at 3am in the morning. I was so angry because the man next to me in the window seat was not even using his window pillow. He should of traded. He just should have....
Anyway. I ended up getting to London at 6 in the morning or some wierd crap time like that. As usual i had not booked accomodation. I needed to find internet but they were all closed so i used a train station expensive standing one. I got excited checking emails and all my money disapeared. I was tired and hungry so i got maccas and sleeped on some steps at a theatre where people were queing for some show. I think they thought i was a hard core fan. I slept for a few hours. Then walked aimlessly, found big ben, and found tralfagar square and then found the internet. Got a 24 hour pass and just sat there for 6 hours. I was so tired i couldnt be bothered. I recieved an email from a sandwich job i applied for and decided to find a hostel nearby.
Stayed at the Globetrotter Inn in Stamford Brook. Got the train there. The train in london costs 3 pounds (8 bucks one way) bloody hell. Hostel was alright. It had a dvd cinema which wasnt working which i was majorly pissed off about. It was full of wanker australians who thought they were all that and experts on everything. Bunch of tossers. I hate Australian travellers. The hostel was too big and too industrial. Never saw the same place twice. There was one nice aussie guy who i hung out a bit and watched x factor with. There was also a cool american guy with red hair who reminded me of bake and a crazy israelly guy who first thing he said was that he killed 2 arabs, corrected himself, 2 terrorists in the army and he has 2 crosses on his m16. Thats great. He was a wierdo and as usual he was in my room. I asked him if the arabs he killed were from palestine. He said there is no such thing as palestine. Ohhh okkkkk i thought. He was a really nice guy to me though. Just a freak. Ive met a few crazy israelis but have met a lot of nice ones too.
So to my working. i had a trial day the day after arriving in london. Off to Isleworth by bus at 7 in the morning. Now you prob thinking that would of killed me. But working is so easy compared to travelling. The routine is relaxing. I did 2 trial days and on monday started my own route that a hungarian girl used to do. Im the only native english speaker there. Their all Hungarian, Brazillian and a couple of Poles. People dont understand what im saying.
Ok i will start with the pros of the job. Its money for now. Its 150 pounds which is like 300 bucks. I get to ride around and see the london suburbs on a bike. I get free lunch, dinner and breakfast because whatever i dont sell i get to take home. Im starting to get really fit. The people are really nice. Theres a cool dog on my route called Scrappy who stays in one of the offices and has become my best friend.
Good you might say. But there is massive cons.
Its only 8:30 till 2. And the pay i get is not worthy of the time. 150 pounds is nothing in the uk. Considering a typical room for a week is 75 pounds and a beer is 3 pounds. Im so exhausted after that I couldnt really work a second job. I have a cart thats really heavy. Its like going to the gym and putting the bike on hard and riding for 5 hours. Im wrecked. Yes, whatever i dont sell i get to eat. But at the end of the week if what i dont sell in sandwiches goes over 100 pounds then whatever i go over i have to pay back. You may thing 100 pounds is a lot. But considering a sandwich is usually around 2 pounds. And you have to take more than will sell. If you 10 people decide they dont want food thats 20 pounds easy. Its dodgy! To get to the places in time and make sure you get everything sorted you have to get there at 8 and leave there at 2:30. Meaning the pay really isnt worth it. Just to fit it all in you have to go all out as hard as you can for 5 hours which is absolutley exhausting! Its also so so cold! And if it rains i get wet. But i dont mind that.
The main things im worried about is the doginess of the pay and the fact i cant find good cheap accomodation nearby. On sunday i left the globtrotters as they were 120 pounds a week (compare that to my pay) and went a station further away to hammersmith to a hostel called Abercorn House. Got a shared 4 person dorm for 55 pounds a week. Big difference in price huh. But big difference in quailty. This is prob the worst place i have ever stayed in. Worst than the bed with the maggots. I actually did check this place out before i booked it. Its just the clientel werent there at the time.
To start the bed sheets had not been changed in a month. The manager gove me bed sheets and got me to change them. Also all they give you is a duner. To cover yourself. Mine was old and smelt of sweat and urine. So i asked for another sheet as a buffer. The bed at night has springs that stick into my back which makes my dreams become nightmares. The first night summed up my stay in this place. I went to the "tv room". The tv room is like one of those smoking rooms at a airport. Its that bad. Full of smoke. The couches in there look like they have been gotten of the street. They also smell of urine. The people there are what make the hostel though. Mainly eastern europe people looking for work. Or people who are borderline homeless. Theres a guy that lays on the couch everynight drinking long necks. The first night i saw 3 polish guys sitting at the table. 2 were being noisy. The third, a quiet one. Said shutup. Then he said i want to kill you. Then he said F*ck your mother, F*ck your country, I want to kill you, lets go outside so i can kill you. The Polish guy who was on the recieving end took it pretty good, saying im from poland too you idiot. Then the aggresive polish guy slapped him in the face and it was on. It was then i realised there were a couple of bogan aussies in the room. Because i heard an aussie say "Give im an uppercut", then i heard another one say! "Get into him!!" It was funny actually. The only good thing about the tv room is the satelitte tv with every station. But theres no remote. Theres also a no sports on tv rule. The two go together because apparently a guy was watching sport and through the remote and broke the tv and then got into a punch up. Its also wierd that in the uk. All the pubs say no jerseys allowed inside the pub. Football hooligans i guess.
Theres people hostel running down the halls screaming. Theres people doing coke and then going on the net and non stop laughing out loud. Theres rubbish on the stairs. Theres only an oven in the kitchen and no untensils (ok because i have sandwiches). Theres no toilet paper. People get kicked out daily and the police are regular site after a bread board beating. The showers are aparrenly cleaned by the cleaner that chucks a bucket off bleach against the wall once a month then used a broom to spread it around. I always wear thongs in the showers here and always that my valuables everywhere!!
I am lucky though. I got a good few guys in my room. 2 aussies guys who are ok. Little bit rough around the edges but really nice guys. One is from horsnby. Theres also a brit guy who had been homeless for 2 months because his wife kicked him out and he lost his job becasue his wife also worked at his company. He's back on his feet now and has some interesting stories to tell.
Things should be good from now on in London. A few friends here. Sarah from Vietnam just got back, as did rae and shelley from Thailand. Might even get to meet the great Wesley again (see pataya). And you may have noticed from the photos that choc chip is here! Met up with her the other night. She is so nice. She shouted me dinner. Meeting up with her tonight as she leaves on boxing day to go home to japan. You can also see an old work mate Michael Stugnell (struggers) is there. ASI people, if you reading and seeing. Look how much fun you can have when you leave the company!
Ive gotten pretty used to the worst place on earth now. I dont even notice the guy who drinks the long necks on the couch anymore and i dont notice the smoke in the tv room or the smell of my bed. Last night at 3am there were yells and screams. In the morning i got up and walked to the bathroom, on the way back i saw a trail of blood all over the hallway and into the kitchen. It looked like someone had been stabbed or something. I dont know how i missed the trail on the way to the bathroom. I just thought i have to get out of this place!!
So now im in a pickle. I dont want to stay in this place any longer. Its dangerous and dodgy. Although there is random normal people there who stick out and random beautiful eastern european girls. I cant stay here for any longer. But there is no where else close to the sandwich place. And to move any further away means being outside the bus line and means a train and a bus or 2 buses and i dont know if its worth it. I check out on sunday so i dont know what im going to do. I dont know whether to stay at this sandwich job or not or what else i can even apply for. Sandwich job is taking a break over next week so i guess i have time to search for other stuff and decide.
I cant believe Christmas is here already. I dont want to spend it in that hostel thats for sure. I think i will decide what to do for christmas day the way i decide everything else on this trip. See how i feel when i wake up. All the shops and pubs close so i will prob buy a case the day before and make christmas a happy event. You can see Jess i remember Paul Kelly, I think it is fitting right now. Im going to miss Christmas at home and am staying in a gaol of a place. Gonna miss my mates at new years, cant believe everyone is getting together.
And roger, im even going to miss roger....
Merry Christmas and Happy New Years everyone.
I will be there in spirit. Driving you there and falling asleep early on the couch.
Regards
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