Gay and broke, but living like a pimp in Bogota

Trip Start Feb 09, 2011
Trip End Ongoing

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Where I stayed
My pimp apartment

Flag of Colombia  ,
Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Hi All,

This will be a photo-filled post; I'm tired and slightly hungover and really struggling to find anything witty to write!
A good friend recently suggested I pretend to be gay and broke in order to disuade a crazy stalker who'd managed to obtain by Blackberry PIN from the friend of a friend - I had become the laughing stock of the office following the incessant vibration of my phone on my desk 10-12 times per day! In seeking some advice, I explained to my mate that I didn't know anything about the girl, and she could therefore be Pablo Escobar's daughter for all I knew, so I wanted to let her down nicely, rather than rudely. So that was when he suggested I pretend to be gay and broke.

I've found it much easier getting to grips with the 'broke' bit.

Anyway, in other news I'm attaching some photos of my new apartment - yes that's a swimming pool, and yes that's a running track and golf driving/midget tossing net on the roof. 

The link below suggests 6 reasons to visit Colombia in 2012.....Actually, you lot have 7, including me!

The apartment's great and one advantage of living in Bogota is that it's not breaking the bank, as somewhere like this would in London. Although strangely some things, like supermarket shopping for instance, are at least as pricey as in the UK!

I've also attached a few additional photos including some of a recent hiking trip, and a BBQ on my roof with some of my new colleagues.
I’m lucky enough to be off to Buenos Aires to spend Xmas and New Year with my old mate Jim: see link for a reminder of my musical condom-liking, Matt Damon-looking friend - We actually spent last Valentines Day together too - in a swanky hotel in Ciudad del Este, Paraguay - so I guess Jim is the closest I get to following my friend's first piece of advice above, but I wouldn't want to give him any ideas!

I'm sure this is the first ever Xmas when I won’t be around my family, which will be strange. I'll also miss the Xmas piss-up with my school mates, which has become a permanent feature of 23 December for the last 11 years.

Stay safe all of you, and hope to see you soon.

Enjoy your time off with your respective families, happy holidays, and all the very best for 2012 everyone!

I am now available for Skype calls by prior arrangement, either before or after the holidays! Alex and Ana, great to talk at the weekend.

Love Ben x
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Anthony Birks on

Hi mate

Good to hear you're settling into life in Bogota, the apartment sounds pretty cool.

Must be strange to be spending Christmas away from home but sounds like you're having an amazing adventure.

Take it easy Alan, all our love and best wishes for a happy, healthy and prosperous 2012!

Tony, Kirsty & Alice

benhockman on

Thanks Tony, best wishes to you and your family - Mum and Dad too. Look forward to some photos of Alice in the New Year.
Happy holidays, Alan! They don't get the Alan thing out here.....

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