Back to Blighty....older, wiser and totally broke

Trip Start Feb 26, 2010
Trip End Feb 26, 2011

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Where I stayed
On a plane on the way home

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Friday, February 25, 2011

Upon Erica's mums orders to ensure we were well rested we completely blew it like normal. Well we blew it in more way than one. Our attempts to get drunk ended badly with overpriced beer and me fainting in an internet shop. No doubt Erica updated on the fact my blood pressure tablet had been replaced with tablets causing constipation, these started to wear off late into the night and I woke up after a few hours sleep with 5 days of exceptionally spicy Mexican cuisine wanting to finally exit my system. I had to go to the loo at least five times during the night which involved getting dressed as there were no male toilets on our floor. I finally gave up trying to sleep as the cathedral clock struck 4am which considering I havent slept well on any kind of transport doesnt bode well for tomorrow nights welcome home party.

Erica on the other hand possibly fared even worse, she seemed to be up all night blowing her nose and coughing and spluttering all over me trying to ensure she is not the only one ill. All in all a complete farce of a final night, no tequila, only two beers it was a piss poor effort to celebrate the last night away of our travels. To be fair we havent really drank since Cuba but it is probably still in our system from then anyway.

Anyway we had the hostel breako which didnt really disappoint with scrambled eggs toast and coffee. That will do us nicely. We then spent a bit of time packing and repacking before dumping our bags in the luggage room while we waited for our final excursion of the trip. The hostel ran a free city tour around old Mexico city with a suggested tip of 3 pound a head. You cant grumble at that. The guide arrived at 10am complete with a bandana and a sombrero we kind of gathered he was a bit of a character.

There were only about 6 of us on the tour but he seemed more than happy with that so we set off into town, where we visited the Cathedral, the Government buildings with fantastic murals which just contained so much detail. I started to get the guys warped sense of humour and after next to no time he was staring in the opposite direction, I looked over then he spun around to Erica and said "look I catch your boyfriend staring at sexy Mexican women, he likes them but he is in love with you". About five minutes later he was telling me that the average penis size of a Englishman is larger than that of a Mexican that is why tall, good looking men with blond hair like myself are in demand all over the world and Mexican men are not. I didnt even know how to respond to that but before I could the sombrero was over the front of my shorts with him shouting "look his penis will not even fit in my sombrero", I instantly started to shy away and walk at the back of the group rather than the front.

We then took in the museum of the city of Mexico which we had to pay a token amount to enter, we were amazed at the studio of Clausell, it had almost small postcards everywhere and tourists are generally not allowed to enter but with a guide as cheeky and cocky as ours we could pretty much do anything.

We then saw various other buildings around the city as well as the Hospital de Jesus, the oldest hospital in Latin America where he just barged in and showed us around it was stunning, not like any other hospital you have seen. We then went to a local bar, mainly for locals, it was a Pulque Hacienda, it was a great place with very old swing doors, and half litre glasses of this very viscous and strong tasting drink for about 1 pounds including a local bean and chili tortilla or five. Whilst none of the others like the fermented plant drink we actually loved it and drank everyones. I can see why it isnt everyones bag to be fair. It used to be the most traditional and most consumed drink in Mexico however from over 1000 bars at the start of the last century only one or two are left in Mexico City. Of course the guide then singled me out, with some very strongly worded sexual suggestions as a consequence of drinking all that. I'll leave that to your imagination.

We next visited what was perhaps the biggest surprise we had in Mexico city, a cake shop, but just like no cake shop you have ever seen before nor even dreamed of, it was huge, you just need to see the size of some of the wedding cakes, I think even Jenny would be amazed at the size of some of these cakes. There were rooms and rooms of the things, and the shop floor downstairs was heaving full of people shopping by the boxful not per item, bonkers. We splashed out on a chicken and chili empanada (even though the last thing I need at the moment are more chilis I have eaten so much chili in Mexico Im surprised I havent pood out any internal organs) and for lady E some kind of cake.

We then headed to a few more museums and palaces before ending in what we would have to say as the most amazing post office we have ever seen. The guide collected his tips and suggested I try and gather a hareem for the evening consisting of Lady E and the three Aussies.... but not the German you dont want her, with that it was all over our final trip of the year, a highly enjoyable day, so Erica and I walked back towards the hostel (only with the German girl) much to the amusement of our guide.

We headed back to the internet cafe to update our blog for the last time. We will then maybe grab a final beer or two jump a cab to the airport and board our flight to London. This arrives at 1pm London Time, we then get on a shuttle plane thing arriving back into Manchester at 6pm, no doubt tired and jet lagged ready to have a party with our parents, siblings and niece, we are guessing we will probably having a Lancashire hot pot with red cabbage, a few pints of bitter or Guinness and maybe a red wine or two, before trying to catch up with some sleep.

We will update again in a few days detailing our thoughts about our trip, our favourite places, boring bits of advice for our fellow travelers and future round the world trippers. It really is a sad day but at least we can see our family, friends and other loved ones for the first time in a year. The sad truth is though for a proper round the world trip a year is nowhere near long enough, we have pretty much worked our arses off for a year without too many breaks and times to chill out and this trip really has opened our eyes to just how big and how small the world really is.

Well its time to sign out of our last internet cafe, I just cant wait to get home and an advanced warning, pity the fool who has a bin in their bathroom, it will be full of used toilet roll, thankfully we have an excuse its an automatic reaction after spending so long in countries where the drains just cant cope with it. Im looking forward to using this excuse for several years, you know walking through peoples houses or future workplaces with handfuls of used toilet roll asking where the bin is. Just brilliant.

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Dil on

I can't believe it's over, what am I going to do now?? I have just managed to get my reading age up to 11 thanks to your blog......back to looking at pictures in the Littlewoods catalogue then I guess.

It's been an awesome year following you both, really can't wait to catch up next week.

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