Day 4 - Bangkok to Phitsanulok

  Phitsanulok, Phitsanulok, Thailand
Thursday, September 6, 2007

We were up today at 7am (I don't know how you wage-slaves do it!), grabbed some brekkie and then took a taxi to the station.

Thus began the most entertaining taxi ride of my life so far...

Our driver, 'Mr John', resembled a fat Thai Elvis impersonator.

He started off abruptly, more than a little rude, then he started asking questions about us.

By the end of the 8 minute journey he had warmed to us and was serenading us with Englebert Humperdink and Elvis numbers! Katie was nearly in tears she was laughing so much! All very bizarre, but good fun.

The only trouble is that now whenever we have a nice peaceful moment all I can think about is him singing "PRRREASE REREASE MEE, RET ME GOOOO!" at the top of his voice while nearly wiping out a few tuk-tuks! Classic.

Oh, and guys, he gave me some great pulling tips...

Apparently all you have to do to attract the woman of your dreams is sing 'Hello' by Lionel Richie to a girl, look her directly in the eyes and then write down your number after singing the line "is it me you're looking for?"... and winking. (Can you imagine?!) Thanks for the tips Mr John, good job I'm already married! 

We got to the train station in good time and were sitting down in the centre of the concourse when some music started blaring through the loud speakers. Right on cue, a troop of soldiers marched inside and stood rigidly to attention.

At this point we realised that the national anthem was being played, when EVERYONE is expected to stand, even tourists! We were a bit nervous to speak to each other in case we got shot or something but thankfully we survived and caught our train a few minutes later.

The train itself looked really old and battered from outside but was surprisingly decent inside, you could even swivel the chairs around to face the other direction. Clever. We also got free breakfast and dinner, which was good work.

It's a bit embarrassing that you can pay GBP 1.50 for an 8 hour journey on a train which is better than the equivalent journey on an English train for which you pay an absolute bloody FORTUNE, but anyway... don't get me started!

We arrived in Phitsanulok a bit late at about 3pm, found our 'hotel', which cost an OUTRAGEOUS 150 Bahts per night... which is the princely sum of about GBP 2.50 or US $5!

We thought we'd found a real bargain, but sadly you normally get what you pay for in life and after a terrible attempted sleep on a bed which made the floor seem comfortable we felt somewhat less smug... and a great deal sweatier.

Phitsanulok is located in the north part of the Thai mainland and it's where they say the culture of the north meets the culture of the centre.

Fascinatingly (ahem), it's also the crossroads for the Thai vegetable economy, so this area is famous for having the highest quality of vegetables in Thailand. (Nearly as high as in the Man United team apparently...) 

We struggled to find anywhere to have lunch as most of the places were closed by 3pm, so we eventually ended up in the delightful surroundings of a 7-11 convenience store.

Katie went for an interesting microwave 'fish balls & rice' combo which was promptly but somewhat harshly labelled as "rank", while my chicken & rice was an absolute legend, especially as it only cost about 60p! Result ;)

After lunch we walked upriver to the local temple, home of a beautiful Buddha statue but unfortunately also full of more fat German tourists than you could shake a stick at.



Both the temple and statue were really beautiful, so we hoped that the holy places in the rest of Thailand would be up to the same standard.



We then walked back down the other side of the river, admiring a few temples from a distance...



...and watched a dragon boat in training for (we later learned) a boat race next weekend, it was absolutely massive!



When we reached the last bridge we saw a new bar which had just opened for business, so we popped in for a couple of beers; well it would be rude not to, right?!



After the lovely cold beers were delivered to our table we were welcomed by a couple of very cute cats and about an hour later walked back to our sweat box... I mean 'room'.



Soon it was dark outside so we went out and braved the local night market, which was full of 16 year old schoolgirls and fake Abercrombie tops... it could have been worse I guess!

We found a nice place for dinner on the river, I had chicken with cashew nuts for a less-than-eye-watering 80p while Katie had two whole fish with ginger for a rather bourgeouis GBP 1.20, which is still less than US $3! 

The beer over here is also dirt cheap, so two large bottles of Chang will generally set you back about 160 Bahts, or about GBP 2.50... nice work if you can get it.

Normally you wouldn't catch me drinking a beer which sponsors Everton FC, but I'm economising by drinking Chang rather than the 'super-luxury' Singha, which is normally about 60 Bahts for a small bottle, compared to the bargain basement 45 Bahts for a Chang!

What's that phrase? "Look after the pennies and the pounds will look after themselves" ;)

The food was fantastic value for money, fresh & really tasty.



With full stomachs and a few cold beers inside us we went back to the room and probably had about 8 minutes sleep in TOTAL before morning, it was an absolute shocker.

The bed was about as soft as a slab of steel and had no sheets on it whatsoever, so Katie was convinced that we'd catch scabies if we slept directly on the matress!

She suggested that we should use our sleeping bag liners instead, which are basically like cotton sleeping bags. These were like sleeping with the lack of movement of a sleeping bag, but without the comfort or cushioning! Horrendous.

The fan whirring above us was about as quiet as a Boeing 747 preparing to take-off, so it was basically a choice between trying to sleep in the heat of the sauna, or the noise of a nightclub.

Hmmmmm....

Maybe I should have phoned Als Jefferson for some tips on the latter, considering his appalling performance on Locky's stag in Krakow! ;)

All in all it was an awful night's sleep, but we agreed that we'd be a bit more switched-on next time we inspected a prospective hotel room, so hopefully our terrible experience here will help us avoid making the same mistake again on the rest of our 8 month trip.


lots of love,


Al & Katie xx