Guangzhou - first stop in my Chinese Escapade.
Trip Start
Mar 03, 2005
1
2
235
Trip End
Ongoing
Guangzhou,
China
Sunday, March 20, 2005
GUANGZHOU, CHINA (PLUS A SMIDGEON OF BANGKOK)
Well I did make it in to the Foreign Correspondants Club in Bangkok on my last night. But budget travellers being budget travellers, we decided that the exhorbitant pricing structure ($2 for a beer) was beyond our price range, so we headed down to the food market down at Lumphini Park. Its an enormous open-air food court, with a full size stage at the end. And the Thais simply love any opportunity to put on a concert, even if it is bad covers, so the live band and dancing girls were truly wocking down the house.
Things were swell until an old-school bar brawl broke out near the front of stage, around 20 metres from where we were sitting. I'm talking flying chairs and long-neck bottled of Chang beer being smashed over peoples heads. Another guy did the old John Wayne style smash the bottle over a table so you've got a sharp instrument in your hands move, which I've never actually seen performed before outside of Spaghetti Western films. I guess this was more Noodle Western than Spaghetti Western. I've never seen anything like it - the locals fleed the immediate area within seconds and the fight drifted away towards the sreet with people chasing others with bottles. Within seconds, the mess had been cleared up and the music recommenced, back to the Billy Joel covers.... Very bizarre as the Thai's normally don't like to "lose face" by losing their cool.
Not a great way to start in China - as it appears I'm coming down with some lergy. SARS? Chicken Flu? Just your stock standard virus? When you are at home you don't really think much when you're sick. You just go to the doctor for their opinion and 99 times out of 100 "you've got a virus, take panadol for the fever, drinks fluids and rest". Occasionally if it drifts on a little longer, "you've got a secondary infection, take anti-biotics, drink fluids, and rest".
When you're traveling the self-diagnosis comes into play. You do the maths on your symptoms, actually taking notice of whats going on with you. Thankfully my first aid kit it quite extensive, so if the self-diagnosis indicated "lobotomy", then I've virtually got the ability to do that. So I'm just taking it pretty easy in Guangzhou.
Guangzhou (formerly Canton) appears enormous and constantly in motion. The bus in from the airport ended up in bumper to bumper traffic, and it was a Saturday afternoon. There are more expressways and raised-roads here than I've ever seen anywhere before, and everything in the infrastructure appears brand new. Some old world traditions remain the same, such as the canal near where I'm staying, which smells like rotting horse dung.
I'm staying on an island called Shamian Dao. Technically its an island because its surrounded by rivers and canals on all sides. Its an old European 'consession' from the Opium War of a few hundred years ago. The Brits got presented with Honkers and Shamian Dao. Hence most of the buildings in this little section of Guangzhou are Euro in style, and there are very few cars to run you over, unlike the rest of the city which is nothing short of bloody mad. But I guess you expect that its going to be mad in a city of 7 million. Out of the 7 million, it apears that at least 50% are spitters, and another 20% have some form of cough or cold. Its a little daunting to face the crowds when you are feeling sick yourself with the thought that other respitory issues are a mere footstep or breathed-in cough away. If there is one major gripe that I do have with Guangzhou (I guess that would make it a Cantonese Beef...) it is the spitters - the older generation are constantly pulling up an oyster from the depths of their gullets and hoisting it off into the streets. Not delightful.
Shamian Dao is the home of wedding couples in Guangzhou. Couples all in virginal white stroll down the boulevards with their photographers in tow - but it is not your normal wedding photo scene. There are shops on the main street where the recently wed can 'hire' wedding costumes and then have their wedding photos taken, as if that was the actual garb that the tied the knot in.
In typical oriental style, the photographers ask the bride and groom to pose in un-natural positions, as if they were vogueing, or appearing in a K Mart catalog. A lot of pointing into the yonders, heads on obtuse angles, and staring into the distance. All with the majestic backdrop of a storm water canal and a major motorway behind them.
After catching the subway into the heart of the city, I stopped off at McDonalds for a McPee. Yes even here in China, the traveller must keep an eyeout for the golden arches, as its the only place in town that can guarantee you a clean loo. I checked out a few of the local buddhist temples. Even though its a big city, and only an hour or two from Hong Kong, there aren't a great number of western tourists in these parts, so there is a fair amount of staring in my direction. There are a fair amount of Chinese tourists around, and top on their list of things to do is "have my photo taken at a tourist destination to prove I was there". There are two poses... If you are older, you stand in front of the monument/temple/important thingy and keep a regimental straight face while your friend takes a photo of you and the background. If you are younger, you stand in front of the monument/temple/important thingy and pose with one leg in front of the other, and if male point at the monument/temple/important thingy, or if female give the 'V' for victory sign with your fingers, while your friend takes a photo of you and the background. (check out my photo gallery for China Tourist Photos 101, when I get a chance to put them in)
Even though it is early days, I am already struggling with the food. China's unofficial other language is "Chinglish", which is basically their very unusual english translations on signs and menus. So far I've had the option of ordering "Chicken Testes" (I believe they actually meant chicken balls, because lets face it how many chicken testicles would it take to make a meal) and "Snake" (which was actually mean to be "Snack"). Actually they do serve snake in some restaurants. I've already seen a few in the live tanks that are normally kept for seafood. And I'm not talking Eel here, I'm talking your full-on snake. For me, even the basics are a little difficult because quite often the pork or chicken dishes will be intestines or feet or the like.
I made my way to the Guangzhou Peaceful Market. Its a cross between a place to buy pets, exotic foods, and unusual bits and pieces for Chinese potions. Scorpions for eating (I'm talkin' bout live ones) were available, right next to Puppies (thankfully not for eating). If you feel the need you can also pick up dried Seahorse, Antler or Bison testicles (thats the word testicle twice in two paragraphs, probably reached my testicle quota for this entry) for that herbal pick me up. Alas I'm just settling for that other ancient medicine for my current condition - Tylanol.
I have ended up staying a few extra days in Guangzhou fighting off this bug. Its meant that I've been forced to watch a great deal of CNN (one of the only English based TV stations), as leaving the hotel has not ben a big option. Apart from feeling weak at the knees due to fever (the old Chinese Burns...), the thought of hearing the locals spitting or getting a mouthful of their pungent 150g Tar Marlboro 'Heavies' into my lungs currently isn't an apertizing option. I can't say that Guangzhou has overly impressed me as a destination to spend a great deal of time in. Hence I'm packing it in, and heading to Zhaoqing, bus-timetable permitting....
