Singapore
Trip Start
Apr 20, 2003
1
24
Trip End
Jun 10, 2003
Singapore,
Singapore
Monday, April 21, 2003
Trip over involved no masks on the plane (anyone surprised), a baby peeing on the seat just over from me, leaving the steward (who reminded me of Steve Vizard in character from Fast Forward, but without the mo) a not so happy person, and involved 2 meals of rice (for gods sake its Qantas, where's the Steak and Chips).
Those who saw me Friday evening would have noted the level one clippers holiday haircut... hope you also noted the 'bald is beautiful' article in the Sunday Herald Sun today. More to that later.
Only saw about 6 people with masks at Slingers airport, including one lady with the elderly person's weak bladder napkin style that Mum tried to get me to pack. Seriously this thing was so large and thick and bulky that if you pee'd in it three times it would note soak through. So I had a laugh at that lady's expense, as well as a laugh at the bloke at the Haagen Daaz stand wearing his mask around his chin. Very few people wear them around the street - it is in the news but no ones really conscious of it. You do have to fill out extra forms though, and the Hotel clerk when you check in does have to take your temperature (36 degrees and no it wasn't a bend over job thank you).
Train in from the airport involved me and a family of eleven people, a strange mix of Malay, Chinese and Indian races, all of the women in Saris, including the non-Indians, two of the men with handle bar moustaches, and all 7 or so kids with mobile phones chatting away. And they found a tall skinny bloke with a short haircut and a backpack funny....
DON'T SHARE MAKE UP, HOORAY FOR BOLLYWOOD, and BRUCE WILLIS.
The front page of the local newspaper said "Don't Share Make Up" as a SARS warning. So I didn't. I found out I'm staying 400m from Singapore General Hospital. I also found out all the SARS folk are elsewhere. Phew.
I went to Little India, walking through markets of dried everything (mostly smelly fish and ginseng) and Bollywood CD/DVD shops, and cheap watches reduced from $250 down to 2 for $9.90. The best bargain was a watch with a Bollywood actor's face on it for $12.
I walked down Orchard Road, the main strip of Singapore. The shop names are absolute classics. "Wax Lyrical" (sells candles), "The $7 Shop" (inflation compared to the $2 shop at home), and my personal favourite "Wanko", which sells women's clothes.
Thought I'd hit the night hawker markets for dinner. A stand called "Big Scissors" had a queue of locals and a nice looking lady who looked healthy and SARS free running it, so I had a go. Then I went to the Night Safari - the highlight being standing in the dark 20 metres from a pack of Lions who decided to roar - and I mean roar - for about 3 minutes solid. Could almost feel their breath on your face. It was an sbsolutely fearsome sound, and thus reason number 812 to barrack for them.
AND here's my quiz. What do Michael Klim, Bruce Willis, Vin Diesel, Andre Agassi and Adrian Murray have in common?
ANSWER - all have shaved heads.
Yep I bit the bullet and gave it a go. Sa-moooooth. Not as easy as it
sounds, but may I say a very liberating experience. Only problem was
realising half way through that I don't have a mirror for the back. Oh well, lucky there wasn't much there anyway. Plenty of nerves on the scone that you don't realise are there until its all gone. Standing in an air conditioned train takes on a whole new feel. Everyone should bit the bullet and nude nut it at least once in their life. There's my tip for you for the day.
WATER TORTURE, PEEK-ING DUCK (Yes Thats The Correct Spelling) and LITTLE INDIA.
I went out of the main city area to the Changi Prison Museum and Chapel. The prison itself is still running, but the Museum is actually off site and down the road next to the Changi Woman's Prison (did ask who was the Top Dog but they didn't seem to understand).
The most bizarre part was the listed preferred torture methods by the Japanese - their favourite was to push a hose down your throat, turn
on the tap for minutes at a time, the jump up and down on your stomached until you passed out.
The ingenuity of the prisons was brilliant - to make rubber shoes, they used rubber plants... the rubber plants needed to be treated by acid so they would toughen up via a chemical reaction of some form - so the prisoners used to collect their own Pee.... another useless fact for you.
Came back in to town via Bugis Market area. Many young hip Singaporeans with various piercing with their own stalls looking at me - possibly all thinking they too should shave their heads. The market also had a great Hawkers section, so I returned their later for dinner. Went the Peek-ing Duck. Not the Peking kind, but the Peeking Kind as it was roasted eyes, feet, beak and all, cut up in front of you. I only ate the meat.
Back via Little India - seriously not a white person or an Asian (as in non-Indian looking) person in sight. Like walking through Delhi I reckon - not many white dudes in this part o' town.
