TravelStream™ news feed for member pjarowi1 on TravelPod's free travel blogs service http://www.travelpod.com/syndication/rss/pjarowi1 en-us Copyright ©2009 TravelPod.com Sat, 20 Jun 2009 07:38:47 -0400 http://www.travelpod.com http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244347200/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244347200/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244347200/tpod.html Sat, 20 Jun 2009 07:38:47 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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San Francisco, California, United States

The last day of the holiday and predictably depressing. After a late rise we headed out for a bagel breakfast and it seemed particularly fitting that the nearby street busker was playing the blues on his saxophone. Our final sightseeing trip would be to the Golden Gate Bridge and, as one would expect, it really didn't disappoint - a fantastic spectacle that gave great views back over the city though the tranquillity was temporarily marred by a group of protesters dressed in Camp X-Ray get up protesting against Guantanamo and the Iraq war - I'm sure whoever is currently being detained (admittedly illegally) at the aforementioned Cuban all inclusive resort will sleep a little better in their shackles safe in the knowledge that, rather than actually do something useful, a group of jokers walked across a bridge in fancy dress banging tambourines.

After a world class hotdog, we were airport bound. At the Hertz car return the attendant asked us if the Mustang had been ok, resulting in an immediate smirk from both of us. OK? We were struggling to think of how it could have been any better. As we handed the keys back, we walked away towards the monorail, taking at least 20 glances back at the car as if we were leaving behing a member of our own family. The registration number is ingrained into our memories in the hope that, somehow, we might be reunited in the future.

Checked in and ready to go, even the prospect of business class flatbeds for our 10 hour return journey could not dilute our disappointment that the journey was finally at an end.

Day Nineteen Stats:

Mileage - 30 (4520 total, and not a word of complaint from the beautiful Mustang)

State registration plates seen - 0 (48 total, damn you, Hawaii and Rhode Island!)

States visited - California
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244433600/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244433600/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244433600/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 13:12:18 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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London, England, United Kingdom

Back in blightly, jetlagged and back to work, the adventures of the previous 2.5 weeks seemed a world away. All good things come to an end I suppose. It might seem appropriate to make some sort of attempt to reflect back and make observations about the great nation that we'd travelled across, but I really don't think two Englishmen born in the latter half of the 20th century have the right to sum up this great nation using a couple of paragraphs in a travel blog. Instead, here are our highs and lows of the journey.....

Highlights

Wisconsin (and Madison) - an unexpectedly wonderful state that just, for some reason we can't quite articulate, felt good. This was maybe due to its countryside bearing some relation to the fields and rolling hills of the UK, but we'd like to think it was more than that.

San Francisco - quite simply, an amazing city with a cosmopolitan, laid back feel that resonated perfectly with our mood after chasing 4.5k miles across the States.

Yosemite - views that I am not articulate enough to convey to you accurately using my childish scribble. Unmissable.

Microbreweries - Before this trip, my view of American beer was not great - bland light beers like Bud and Miller. However all of the local towns and cities we stayed at had great local breweries spouting pale ales and wheatbeers galore. It's not quite Germany (where is?), but it's certainly a player in the hops world.

Grand Tetons - A sunset drive with cool temperatures in the shadow of the mountains on our way from Yellowstone to Idaho, perhaps the most tranquil part of our trip and a place where we could happily have admired in total silence for hours.

The people - despite fears of walking into bars where the music stops and everyone turns around to look at you, everyone we met was extremely friendly and welcoming. The only slight minor here being the frequent assumption that we were 'together'...!

Lowlights

To be honest, there really weren't many. If pushed we'd plump for the following:

Sioux Falls - simply put, a complete dive with nothing to offer.

Driving with a hangover - even with an open top, cruise control and an automatic gearbox, this wasn't fun. Though we were big enough to make the call not to see the Grand Canyon due to being over the limit from the night before.

Handing the keys back to the Mustang - a horrible experience!


In summary, an unbelievable trip across a country with so much to offer - big cities, great outdoors, deserts, mountains.....but we'll sign off with a special mention to the linchpin and unsung hero of the trip - the New Jersey, YUK 66P Mustang. Purring us a total of 4520 miles through every gradient and terrain possible, our initial fear of spending up to 12 hours a day in the car quickly vanished as it became clear that this was a dream beast to be at the wheel of.

G Smith & P Jarowicki, June 2009.
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244260800/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244260800/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244260800/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 12:46:54 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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San Francisco, California, United States

As predicted, heads were not in the best state during the morning but a visit to the Farmer's Market by the waterfront (a recommendation from the previous evening) for breakfast gave us enough rocket fuel to explore San Francisco properly by foot. It was soon clear that this really is a special city which has a very different feel to everywhere else we'd visited across the US. The attitude in general was much more laid back and the artistic and bohemian influences were manifested everywhere from the fashions to the wonderfully diverse architecture and houses. Built on a series of incredibly steep hills, great views of the city and also long bustling streets were pretty much everywhere. Equally enchanting was that all of the public transport and also emergency services still use historic vehicles - trams, streetcars (many from cities from all over the world), old fashioned fire engines (with the old fashioned sirens) giving the place a much more nostalgic feel in comparison to the other big cities. Wandering along quiet, picturesque backstreets we quickly agreed that this was by far the best city we'd taken in and its spontaneity soon became apparent when we chanced across the San Fran equivalent of the Notting Hill carnival. The Union Street party was in full swing and consuming a good 20 blocks like wildfire - characterised predominantly by young people being absolutely shedded, we were slightly disappointed that our hangovers were preventing active participation. Nevertheless it was a thoroughly enjoyable stroll and rather amusing to see how much of a state everyone was managing to get themselves into.

After failing to locate the Golden Gate Bridge on foot, we went back to the hotel for a quick powernap before taking in dinner at Alfred's historic steak house. It was then onto North Beach, the main area in town, for Saturday night. Columbus Café was bar number one, and perhaps in continuation from the Union Street shenanigans everyone was in a complete state at 9pm. I'm not sure what to make of it really as I thought it was only we Brits that seem to be able to get ourselves into horrific states in public each weekend, but evidence was seeming to suggest that the Yanks weren't the worst at this either. We attempted to get a game of pool but the characters currently 'playing' were so wasted that their first game lasted around 50 minutes so we sacked that off and propped up the bar instead. It was then that we were accosted by perhaps the most odious human being that I've ever had the misfortune to be within 50 yards of. Basically a rather boisterous and obnoxious (not to mention blind drunk) female started talking to us (well, at us) at the bar after clocking us as a couple of Brits. We were subjected to a particularly aggressive account of why the bar we were in was the best in the world ("You guys should have spent your whole va-cay (I'm assuming this meant vacation) in here, man - there's no point being anywhere else") and why Ted Baker were 'assholes' for sacking her (probably a wise move) amongst other 'banter' that included her trying to take Greg's watch off without him noticing. At this point I was actually quite keen to cover myself in Absinthe and set myself alight, so we made our excuses and departed for the Amante bar next door. After successfully convincing Michael Bolton on the door that we were above 21, we entered to find a truly atrocious place filled with nothing but a group of forty-something men who were literally all over the place. One gentleman attempted to talk to us at the bar but really couldn't string a sentence together so we decided to press on sharpish to the live music venue, the Grant & Green Saloon, on the next corner.

Perhaps the sweatiest bar of all time, this place was notable for two reasons. Firstly, the rock band playing were utterly atrocious though clearly thought they were the next Kings of Leon or suchlike. Secondly, there was a guy (in a Scottish rugby shirt) going absolutely mental at the front a la Ian Curtis to such an extent that he started convulsing and headbutted the guitar of one of the band (not that it made much difference to the music). At first we thought he'd had an epileptic fit, but on closer inspection he was just bladdered and a bit of a twat. You can take the boy out of Scotland....

Having had little luck in terms of decent establishments thus far, we eventually made it to Maggie McGarry's Irish pub where a fantastic Irish band were filling the air with everything from U2 to the Pogues. Furthermore, although most of the punters were as drunk as the previous places, they were a slightly better bunch and, after a lemon drop cocktail for posterity, we took great pleasure in watching a couple of frat boys having a dance off in front of the whole bar. A little worse for wear, we trotted home and were fortunate enough to witness one man take his pants down and urinate in the middle of the road whilst another burst out of a nearby bar just in the nick of time to projectile vomit across the pavement (or should that be sidewalk?) - it was just like being back at home.

Day Eighteen Stats:

Mileage - 0 (4490 total)

State registration plates seen - 0 (48 total)

States visited - California
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244174400/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244174400/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244174400/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 12:37:24 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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San Francisco, California, United States

For the first time on our journey, it pissed it down with rain. Add that to an undeserved hangover and you've got a horror of a morning. Consequently the short drive to San Francisco wasn't a barrel of laughs though that may have had something to do with having Morrissey on the radio all the way.

Again, the arrival into San Francisco, our final destination, was a stunning affair as we drove into downtown over the huge bay bridge. The combination of high rise buildings and the characteristic San Fran hills immediately endeared us to the city and, despite the sat nav going completely mental (better here than in the middle of the desert) we arrived at the hotel in good time.

Checked in and bags left in the room, we had a quick wander down to the main shopping district and yet again got temporarily sidetracked by the Abercrombie and Fitch sale (it's soooooo bloody cheap!!) . Despite this lapse, we still had enough time to orientate ourselves and take in the fantastic array of architecture and generally great atmosphere that the place had to offer. Things got even better when we spied an old school car offering tours of the city - Mr Toad Tours ("Mr Toad.....look at him, at least start with him....Mister Toad") in a great nod to perhaps one of the greatest scenes from The Office.

Still a little on the worn down side from the previous night, we recharged the batteries via a quick powernap before going to dinner in nearby Chinatown at the highly recommended House of Nanking where, even at 7pm, there was a queue outside of punters waiting to get a table. Being in a 2 allowed us to jump the queue to a certain extent and we were not disappointed with the fantastic Asian cuisine on offer, to borrow a saying from Sir Brian (RIP) - we wouldn't say it was the best meal we had all holiday, but it was certainly in the top one. After washing down our food with a few bottle of Tsing Tao, we were particularly amused to find out that the local Chinese radio station was named 'Sing Tao'.

A few beers in the Thirsty Bear Brewery later, we got word from the waitress that the best place to go on a Friday was an area called The Mission so we saddled up in a cab and headed south, eventually winding up in Blondie's Bar & No Grill as recommended by the cabbie. Again, things started off slowly and we managed to get a seat at the bar whilst consuming numerous pints of the local Anchor Steam brew. Things started to liven up a little despite the DJ playing some of the worst music possible and we were approached by a couple of ladies who turned out to be attorneys that were keen for us to join them on the dance floor. Not nearly drunk enough to do so, we politely declined (much to their annoyance) and set about a few more pints of Anchor before a few of the locals recommended the Lemon Drop cocktail. A few of these really had us in trouble and, after a drink in one last bar which we really didn't need, we headed back to the hotel fully aware that two days on the sauce was going to give us a few problems tomorrow.

Day Seventeen Stats:

Mileage - 145 (4490 total)

State registration plates seen - 0 (48 total, are there even number plates in Hawaii or Rhode Island?!)

States visited - California
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244088000/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244088000/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244088000/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 12:31:41 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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Groveland, California, United States

We managed to drag ourselves out of bed reasonably early today in order to maximise our time in Yosemite which, from the guidebooks and all other advice we'd been given, was rumoured to be one of the most spectacular places on Earth. After breakfast we headed straight on the short drive to Yosemite and climbed through convoluted forest roads towards the heart of the park in Yosemite Valley. The entrance to the valley is via a long tunnel carved through the mountain and when you eventually appear the view is beyond sublime. A huge forest expanse walled by vertical cliffs sporting waterfalls that gush hundreds of feet into the valley below - the most breathtaking thing either of us had ever seen. The view is so picture perfect it almost seemed unreal, more like part of a movie set for Jurassic Park or a painting of a utopian landscape rather than something that is actually right in front of you and there to explore.

After taking it all in, we went straight for the big one - climbing Yosemite Falls, a 3.4 mile hike that takes you 2700 feet up to the top of the cliff face and waterfall. It's really not for the faint hearted as the winding path pulls you up the rock face on a gradient of 45 degrees or more for most of the way - the guide book budgets 2.5 - 4 hours but we yomped our way up in 1 hr 45 minutes though, were it not for a quick pit stop to take in some Haribo, we may have wilted given the high temperatures. The views as you ascend are superb, notably the opening next to the waterfall in full flow where the cool spray offers a welcome and refreshing shower, temporarily allowing you to ignore your legs screaming "stop bloody doing this to me". It goes without saying, but the vista at the top of the valley is awe inspiring and we took the opportunity to have perhaps the most well-earned sandwich in history. I sincerely doubt if I'll ever eat anywhere with a better view, though the elevated outlook I get over Tesco in Slough from my office every day probably comes a close second.

Not content with this, we trekked a further mile up 500 feet to Yosemite Point which is more or less the apex of the northern side of the valley for even better views before getting slightly lost (not ideal in rattlesnake territory) on the first leg of the way back down. The journey down the rest of the way is obviously easier than the ascent, but still gives the hamstrings a damn good hammering. We made our way back at a swift pace, though we were overtaken by a couple of crazy Japanese guys who were actually running - this is basically suicidal given that (a) it's incredibly slippy, (b) paved with jagged rocks and (c) so steep that one wrong move will basically turn you into a base jumper without a parachute.

At the bottom, our ambition to carry on to the next 4 mile hike was diminished to such an extent that doing any more climbing was laughable. We instead took a quick walk to the lower falls where the waterfall hits the rocks and river of the valley floor and were accosted by an ex US Air Force veteran who proceeded to tell us how the USA developed the radar used in world war two which saved our bacon during the Battle of Britain. This anecdote was almost as enjoyable as Greg explaining to him that the technology was actually developed in the UK but we agreed not to patent it and let the Americans finish the job off in return for assistance in the war. That pissed on the old fellow's chips. One nil to the Brits! After that right hook, he then proceeded to tell us that he'd lived in California for more than 40 years but that this was his first visit to the park - a crime of gargantuan proportions based on what we'd seen today. This was actually a pretty constant theme during our whole trip - despite the myriad geographical and urban jewels that the country had to offer, most people hadn't really bothered to see many of them - even the ones on their own doorstep. Indeed the standard response from most people when we tell them we're travelling across the whole country tends to be something like "get outta here"/"SHUT UP"/"no way, you're kidding me".

After leaving the old chap to go home and burn all his radar books, we took a few more pictures of the meadows and valley floor and decided that we'd best make a move to get to our hotel in time for dark. There's so much to do in Yosemite but we really only had around 6 hours to get stuck in, however we felt we'd leveraged that time to the absolute maximum so no complaints I suppose.

Now, the Groveland Hotel is a bizarre place - on entering our room we were both amused and bemused to find teddy bears laid out on our beds (one in a particularly suggestive pose). We also later found out that it was haunted, perhaps by spectres of all the people who'd bankrupted themselves attempting to buy dinner in their restaurant given the prices on offer. We opted to go elsewhere on principal given that the receptionist suggested that if we wanted to eat there we'd need to make a reservation, despite the fact that it was now 8pm and none of the 40 tables were occupied.

If there was ever a Jekyll and Hyde evening then this was it. We went next door to the Iron Door Saloon, the oldest saloon in California, to eat and for a few local brews. All things considered, it was more or less dead with the exception of a few locals plus a table of 4 German tourists (who inexplicably shared one burger) so we played a frame of pool and gleaned some amusement from the slightly odd compere hosting the karaoke which nobody seemed particularly interested in. We were about to turn in for the night when, out of nowhere, a tour bus of around 40 people arrived and completely filled the whole saloon. Before we knew it, the place was in full swing with locals and tourists alike ploughing through the beer and karaoke like it was going out of fashion. We managed to get chatting to a few of the locals who were actually quite a welcoming bunch, especially one chap who introduced us to the hitherto unheard of tradition of sticking your dollar bills to the ceiling with a drawing pin. This is made slightly more difficult by the fact that the ceiling was about 10 feet high, so the basic premise is that you have to pierce the dollar with the pin, roll it up and then throw it upwards to try and get it to stick in the wooden beams. The ceiling is littered with them so Greg had a stab and, at the 945th time of asking, managed to get one to stick before celebrating like he'd won the lottery, throwing in a big high five for good measure.

We couldn't quite figure out the dynamic of the tour party - a real mixed bag of ages and nationalities. Apparently they were all on a day trip from San Francisco to Yosemite which seemed fine but really was a shining example of why travelling in your own car is such a great option - i.e. you make your own decisions about where to go and when and you also eliminate the risk of getting stuck on a coach next to a complete wanker for 5 hours.

Way too drunk considering we'd only had 7 or 8 beers (something to do with the altitude apparently), we stumbled back next door to our patiently waiting teddy bears.

Day Sixteen Stats:

Mileage - 95 (4345 total)

State registration plates seen - 1 (48 total! Hooray for Arkansas!!)

States visited - California
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244001600/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244001600/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1244001600/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 09:27:33 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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Fish Camp, California, United States

Google told us there was an IHOP (international house of pancakes) next to our hotel yet despite driving around the block for 10 minutes we were still none the wiser - even the Police officer, who we quizzed when next to us at a junction (on a green light, perhaps not the smartest move in hindsight), was unable to help so we had to settle for the marginally inferior Starbucks breakfast muffin before departing in search of Sequoia National Park.

High up in the mountains, Sequoia was shrouded in mist, cloud and drizzle which actually contributed to some rather atmospheric views across the valley. We were also lucky enough to see a small bear close to the road minding his own business then scratching his arse on a tree - obviously onlookers simply watched and took pictures with a total disregard for the privacy of the animal. Can you imagine getting up from the toilet to see 8 bears with Nikon cameras snapping away from your landing? A quick hop down one of the trails and we got sight of the world's biggest tree, the General Sherman sequoia which was pretty impressive - though we did have difficulty taking pictures thanks to a German couple who quite simply wouldn't move out of the way (insert standard, racist gag about occupation here). After finally procuring some photos we followed the guide book recommendation of a hike up to the Tukopa falls. We were now in Bear country, so apparently when you park your car anywhere you have to take any food out and place it in the designated bear proof lockers which surround most car parks. Apparently bears can smell food through the car and will try and break into a vehicle if they think they can get a free lunch - I was only marginally worried when we realised we'd left the tic tacs on show in the passenger seat as I assumed that bears really don't give a toss about whether their breath is bad or not.

Given the slightly elevated sense of ursine based anxiety created by these warnings, the 20 minute hike up to the falls through dense woodland was a little tense - we probably stopped at least 3 or 4 times to check that peculiar shapes in the distance were actually rocks and not brown bears ready to tear off our faces. The view of the falls was worth the trek and we had a little down time on the rocks nearby admiring the valley before hiking back to the relative safety of the Mustang (tic tacs still present).

The drive out through Kings Canyon was a windy affair which eventually turned into a late night rally drive around hairpin bends in the pitch dark of the forest before we eventually found our hotel just south of Yosemite park. We arrived so late that they'd hung up our key outside the reception as it was now closed for the night. Sensing that dinner was probably out of the question, we found a hotel 2 miles up the road that was still serving hearty fare hence managed to satisfy the hunger created by a few hours of bear dodging.

Day Fifteen Stats:

Mileage - 280 (4250 total)

State registration plates seen - 0 (47 total, still...)

States visited - California
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243915200/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243915200/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243915200/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 09:17:48 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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Bakersfield, California, United States

After breakfast (where Greg dined on the unforgivably opulent lobster and asparagus omelette) we left Sin City and headed for Bakersfield, California. In hindsight, we both concluded that Vegas wasn't really anything special and that to make the journey to the US purely to visit this one place would be a completely wasted opportunity. As we trundled across California the desert gave way to golden, sun kissed hills and you could almost sense the pace of life slowing around you. Furthermore, initial impressions were that California was actually a bit on the rough side based on the number of drunks and shifty looking characters knocking about all over the place. Arrival in Bakersfield did little to contradict our initial hypothesis - this was supposedly the fastest growing city in California yet, when we had a look around for somewhere to eat, the streets were literally dead except for the odd homeless person. Fortunately we stumbled on a rather nice little basement bar home to an Italian restaurant where we had dinner although, despite our previous experience of US portion sizing guidelines, we somewhat foolishly made the mistake of ordering both a starter and main course. Such was the lack of portion control that we basically had to ask our waitress (who had left her sarcasm-o-meter at home based on her reaction to some of our banter) to box up roughly 90% of our main courses for lunch the next day. Initially quiet, the bar quickly became full of twenty(ish)-somethings for the weekly trivia night while we knocked off our nightly 5+ frames of pool. People had been flocking in for an hour or two and it was now 10.30pm, yet the quiz proceedings had yet to approach anything like commencement so, a little battle weary from Las Vegas, we went home for an early night.

Day Fourteen Stats:

Mileage - 290 (3970 total)

State registration plates seen - 0 (47 total, still...)

States visited - Nevada, California
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243828800/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243828800/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243828800/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 09:08:24 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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Las Vegas, Nevada, United States

We woke just in time to miss breakfast and were therefore forced to take in the Bellagio lunchtime buffet which is, essentially, a portly man's paradise. Every food known to man, then some we've yet to classify, was on offer and a good number of our American chums clearly mistook this as an opportunity to eat so much that it really was akin to funnelling grain into a helpless foie gras goose. This was certainly the case with the gentleman sat not too far from us who was the second contender for the 'fattest person spotted in the US' award - literally an airship, this chap went through more plates than a greek wedding in a wedgewood factory. Despite a more controlled approach, we still waddled out of the dining hall and out to the pool like a couple of pregnant women.

The pool area at the Bellagio is predictably outstanding, complete with private boudoirs for hire, 4 or 5 different pools, table (sun lounger?) service and a good dose of complete posers. We spent the afternoon relaxing in the tropical temperatures - I cracked on with the blog whilst Greg finished 'The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas' (If the holocaust doesn't get you in the mood for a good night out then nothing will) and we thought it would be unfitting not to indulge in a few beers for good measure. Rumours were that the Palms hotel was a good place to go on a Monday night so we headed that way via taxi for some Mexican chow (great pink frozen strawberry Margarita from Greg giving off the alarm bells to all and sundry that we were probably a 'couple').

In our search for a pool table to cure the post-dinner lull, we went for a wander to the bar next to the Palms and were amused to see a gentleman, clearly absolutely pissed beyond all salvation, driving a Mustang around the car park. He even found the time to stop next to us, garble "better call 911 dude" then accelerate off at the speed of light. Our search for billiards was in vain so we went up to the Playboy bar on the 52nd floor for a couple of drinks before the Ghost bar. Despite thinking that the Playboy watering hole was probably going to be pretty decent it was, in fact, shite. Plastic women breezing from table to table in an attempt to persuade punters to buy the quite ludicrously priced cocktails (a bottle of vodka was $450 - even funnier since this worked out to be around three times as expensive as buying the equivalent amount of alcohol in individual drinks) provided little entertainment - though a quick chat with the bouncer, who implied he'd slept with pretty much every woman in America (God help him), afforded some temporary salvation. One of the ladies did attempt to chat to us but her banter extended no further than the fact that she was currently taking swimming lessons and that, if she got into trouble in the water, it didn't matter because her boobs helped her float. Amazing - talk about pigeonholing yourself.....mentioning your fake breasts within 14 seconds of speaking to us. We made a swift exit and took the elevator up to the significantly better Ghost bar which is on the 55th floor on the other side of the hotel and therefore gives fantastic views over the glittering Vegas Strip. Again, as it was Monday, it wasn't exactly the Rio carnival but we still managed to get some good pictures of the city lights whilst being mildly entertained by a rather excited chap dancing away on his own in the middle of the whole bar. A couple of recommendations from the bar staff entailed us moving location to Jet Club at the Mirage hotel which turned up trumps as the place was packed to the rafters by the time we arrived. The downside was the queuing system which somehow used 5 different lanes and seemed to be arbitrary in terms of who was allowed in and when - indeed, when quizzed, the bouncer managing our line retorted "I've no idea either, I just let you in when they tell me to", clearly overwhelmed with job satisfaction. After eventually making our way in, the remainder of the evening was characterised by becoming a little too tipsy and discovering a room playing late 90s dance music - thus resulting in some inexplicably bad and lengthy dancing from the both of us. Rather ironically for a packed club, such was the enjoyment of the aforementioned trip down musical memory lane, we only spoke to two people - a prostitute who asked "you boys after a good time?" (n.b. answer - "not that sort of good time I'm afraid") and two girls who were from Billericay (and clearly in possession of good appetites but loose morals) that we had to make a swift getaway from. On the way out we also spotted a couple of the least convincing transsexuals you're ever likely to see stood at the bar - basically both about 7ft tall and built like tanks - it was the equivalent of putting lipstick and handbags on Shaquille O'Neal. A little scared, we made for the taxi rank and went back to the Bellagio (despite our taxi driver insisting that a strip club was the way forward) where we had the misfortune to think that blackjack was a good idea at 5am. Damage was limited given that we were on the $5 minimum bet table (high rollers!) and I can assure you that there wouldn't have been too much difference in the outcome had we placed a couple of turnips on our stools and asked them to play the hands instead. Not exactly pro gamblers, Greg and I. After somehow procuring an excellent pulled pork sandwich at the 24 hour Bellagio Café, it was eventually bedtime.

Day Thirteen Stats:

Mileage - 0 (3680 total)

State registration plates seen - 0 (47 total, still...)

States visited - Nevada
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243742400/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243742400/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243742400/tpod.html Wed, 17 Jun 2009 09:04:23 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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Las Vegas, Nevada, United States

It was perhaps the hangovers that persuaded us to plump for a Mexican breakfast in Flagstaff - a choice that most certainly polarised opinion. Whilst Greg was busy shovelling down his omelette (coated in tomato salsa, guacamole, spicy refried beans, Tabasco and suchlike) I was tentatively pushing eggs around my plate with more or less no intention of finishing them off. Quite why anyone would want to start the day with the kind of meal that ensures an inferno of the entire gut is beyond me - however we'd had a reliable recommendation that this was the place for breakfast in Flagstaff (or 'the Flag' as the locals referred to it).

The subsequent drive to Las Vegas across the Arizona and Nevada deserts was an apt reflection of our Mexican petit dejeuner in so much as the outside temperature was topping 104 Fahrenheit and we were sweltering even with the air conditioning on full blast. This was compounded when we got caught in a huge traffic jam crossing the Hoover Dam. The Dam is obviously a majestic engineering achievement - harnessing the power of the Colorado River some 80 years ago is not to be sniffed at. However it really is a bit of a mess and, in comparison to the multitude of aesthetic scenery we'd been lucky enough to sample beforehand, we found it a little too garish to glean any enjoyment from. The baking drive onto Vegas was made almost bearable by listening to the Ricky Gervais podcasts and before we knew it, the glitzy skyline emerged from the desert as we sped towards our destination.

A cheap deal through Hotels.com allowed us to get a room in the Bellagio (one of the most reputable hotels in town) and the gargantuan complex did not disappoint. Right from the entry hall (a multi-coloured assault on the senses) through the Casino (acres of gambling paradise) and to the staff (90% female with ludicrous boob jobs) it really was the embodiment of Vegas. You could more or less live here and never leave if you so wished - tonnes of restaurants, shops, bars and entertainment to keep even the most extreme of extroverts as happy as the proverbial pig in excrement. After making short work of the offerings in the noodle bar we had a bit of a wander about the town which conveniently was on our door step. Vegas is everything you'd expect it to be - bright, bustling and offering pretty much anything to everyone (for a price, of course!). The humidity and temperature made things a little uncomfortable, not to mention the latinos attempting to sell you women on pretty much every street. Furthermore, everyone seemed to be walking the streets blind drunk and really living the Vegas dream of booze, drugs and total hedonism - in a nutshell this was Blackpool/San Antonio but bigger and on speed. After a couple of frames of pool we ended up in the Coyote Ugly bar which, despite appearing to be a reasonable choice from afar, was probably the worst place either of us have ever been to (and I've been to Skegness, Castleford and Rhyl). Essentially, this was a pit of baying, drunken males gawping at a bunch of waitresses who were more or less whoring themselves on the bar through the medium of song and dance whilst dishing out shots to whoever was whooping the loudest. Hardly the place one would want to frequent unless someone had actually taken your brain out and replaced it with shit. After probably the quickest drink in history, we nipped back to the hotel for a JD and coke at the bar before hitting the hay for a good night's kip.

Day Twelve Stats:

Mileage - 260 (3670 total)

State registration plates seen - 0 (47 total, still...)

States visited - Arizona, Nevada
]]> http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243632820/tpod.html http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243632820/tpod.html#comments Travel Blogs http://www.travelpod.com/travel-blog-entries/pjarowi1/1/1243632820/tpod.html Mon, 08 Jun 2009 17:48:25 -0400 HAC versus the USA

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Moab, Utah, United States

On reflection, we probably got the balance of today a little wrong. We'd already agreed our two activities for the day - trip to an outlet mall and visiting Moab Arches National Park. Unfortunately we spent way too much time (and money) at the former, leaving us with just an hour or two to enjoy the latter.

We went to the outlet mall with the intention of a whistle stop tour to take in the bargains and then get out asap. However, thanks to Greg setting the world record for pawing items he was never going to buy in the Columbia store, we ended up wasting 3 hours there. Not ideal, so when we eventually got moving it was a case of getting the foot down and reaching the arches as quickly as possible. As you travel south through Utah, the geography changes again from rugged forests to a more arid steppe, throwing in significantly higher temperatures for good measure. Arriving at the arches, we wanted to get some decent views and pictures before sunset, so raced through the park to see the 'Delicate Arch', the most famous in the park. It's a slightly eerie place, where vast valleys of near-desert are covered with lichen that results in a luminous green glow, though somehow this doesn't look out of place. Rather than hike the hour up to the arch (which we didn't have time to do) we parked at the viewpoint which gives great views from distance. From our vantage point it was clear to see that the arch was swarming with tourists who had made the trek and this gave us some consolation in so much as the sense of wonder in seeing something so remote and spectacular is significantly diluted if you're crammed in like sardines. Back down at the car, all was not as it should have been.

A german family had somehow managed to lock themselves out of their hire car, in the middle of a national park, miles from anywhere. The father managed to explain this to us, his desperation at an almost tangible level. Cutting a long story short, they were staying in nearby Moab and therefore needed a lift back to the hotel so they could contact the hire company. Our sense of humanity kicked in (aided by the fact he only had one leg) so we duly stepped in to save the day. There were four of them and only space for two in our car, so in an act of incredible naivety he asked us to drive his not unattractive teenage daughters to the hotel whilst he and the mother followed behind. I can only assume we looked like the trustworthy type! Banter in the car was minimal due to the barriers of age (our guess was 16) and language, so we eventually found an agreeable middle ground via some old school dance music on the iPod. Arrivng at their hotel, we continued our helping hand by calling the car hire company and sorting pretty much everything out for them before bidding them a kind farewell. From the karma perspective, one can only assume that the next time we break down in Stuttgart there'll be a bus harbouring the German national under 21 female beach volleyball team ready to help us out. Das ist gut.

The upshot of our heroics was that it was approaching 10pm and we were still some 70 or 80 miles from our intended destination (Blanding). Moab actually looked like quite a decent place so our caution-to-the-wind traveller mentality kicked in (we're soooo on the edge) and we found a hotel in Moab instead. Another sizeable dinner at another microbrewery later, we were directed to the supposedly popular local bar which, for a friday night, was a little on the tame side. Again, glances from the locals clearly implied we'd been earmarked as homosexuals (I'd love to see a reality programme pitching a group of rednecks in Brighton) - despite the temptation to do so, approaching the aforementioned characters with something like "we're not a couple of gays you know" is probably not the best conversation starter in these parts. After nearly falling asleep into our beers, we played a little pool to wake ourselves up before trudging home a little more than weary eyed.

Day Ten Stats:
Mileage - 280 (3090 total)
State registration plates seen - 0 (47 total, still...)
States visited - Utah
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