 Men's Day & Women's Day in Uzbekistan, Holiday practices |
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| ahamill |
 Mar 8 2009, 02:25 AM
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Wayfarer
Group: Local Expert
Posts: 47
Joined: 5-July 07
From: Central Asia/Middle East
Member No.: 67301
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February 23rd was Soviet Army Day - a day when, from 1945 to... well, apparently current times, the men were honored for service and such. Here in Uzbekistan, it's called Men's Day now, but they also call it Army Day.
In our offices, the women of the office 'surprised' the men with cake and juice and a little party in the conference room. Toasts were made, speeches by the senior women officers, and all in all it was quite a nice thing.
There are lessons to be learned about other cultures, other peoples, if a person listens more than talks. Here are some parts of the toasts:
"We love you men because we feel safe here with you..."
"We thank you for protecting us..."
"You work hard for us..."
Interesting.
7th of March is International Women's Day, and it is celebrated here too as Women's Day. On Friday (6th), the men did the same thing: cakes were bought, toasts were made, gratitude expressed. Here were some parts of the toasts:
"You take care of all our important office duties like filing and numbers and paperwork..."
"Without you we couldn't do our jobs..."
"Behind every man is a woman..."
There is a woman working full-time in that office who isn't Uzbek and, though not American or with what I'd characterize even as a Westernized 'ideal' of women's equality issues that is such a part of our political and cultural discussion - but still, she was the only one with embers burning in her eyes during the toasts.
Interesting.
Not to say that anyone meant anything bad or disrespectful by it - and there may be something to be said for an environment that is less volatile, less poised on the edge of explosions of righteous indignation, less hypervigilant, less prone to angry objections and insult, less paralyzed by the fear of putting something the wrong way - a verbal mistake that can lead down that road...
My Uzbek and Russian colleagues joke a lot about these types of differences between here and "the West". Ah well - just a topic for discussion, in the end - and observation.
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Sleepless in Tashkent
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| ahamill |
May 3 2009, 06:57 AM
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Wayfarer
Group: Local Expert
Posts: 47
Joined: 5-July 07
From: Central Asia/Middle East
Member No.: 67301
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I'm kind of delighted and horrified to see that my topic inspired a bit of ... enthusiastic rhetoric? For the record, when I make a little entry in this forum area, I do so taking great effort to simply relate what I observe and limit my comments to neutral (but accurate) ones such as "INTERESTING!" - I make no judgment and offer no hints as to how I personally feel on a topic. I hope I've succeeded!
By relating some of these experiences I hope to give folks outside of Uzbekistan a little taste of what life is like here, everyday life. The truth is, the roles played by women and me here are quite different. As an example, having lived here for more than a year and taking local taxis at least 5 times a week, two days ago was the first time I experienced a taxi driver who was a woman. Worthy of note only because it is an experience conspicuous by its singularity - and helps to underline both the divide between women and men and also that, in Tashkent anyway, women are exploring career and activities that used to be taboo for them. (one remembers that in Saudi Arabia, it is illegal for women to drive)
Another example was the plof I was invited to about 3 weeks ago by my gardener. He lives in a very small apartment a bit up the road, behind another home, and he lives alone with his wife. They're probably around 60 years old and have children and grandchildren. I was treated to a quite tasty meal of plof (rice prepared in the fat from a sheep's hindquarters (specifically) with a few yellow carrots cut up into it and a bit of shredded meat - either sheep or horse or, sometimes, beef), and of course was seated with the gardener on the floor mat with the knee-height table, covered in blankets (in the winter, a warmer is placed under that, and legs are inserted under the low covered table, to keep yourself arm), and served tea. The wife appeared only to serve and clear; when she approached, my very traditional Uzbek gardener didn't even look at her when issuing instructions to bring more of something, or take something away. Naturally, to MY sensibility, this treatment which would have easily offended any waitress in the US, was only unsurprising because I've seen it so often before and know it to be cultural and established - he wasn't being rude to his wife, he was behaving as he was taught to behave, as was she.
Now here's the rub: with a very fun and frank discussion with a young Uzbek who's traveled around the world and seen many different cultures, I have learned that this lifetime of serving their men (often men who sort of laze about, drink too much too often, sow wild oats with impunity, and so on) does NOT go unnoticed. In fact, what I was told was that in fact these men, after a lifetime of being nurse-maided and cleaned up after and cooked for and spoiled, and drinking too much and smoking too much, they usually age quite a bit more badly than their wives - who are usually a lot younger than they are, too. When the man finally reaches an age of infirmity, this is the time when the wives blossom a bit - and, unfortunately, the husband finds himself on the receiving end of some pretty long-fermenting revenge. Whether that revenge is just being talked-back-to and not being as available to 'serve' as she had been for the last 40 years, my friend didn't specify: he limited himself to saying "it can be pretty bad!". I asked him if that was something that was visible to the family, that young boys can see - and he said yes indeed, that that role-reversal in old age is something that is also instructive for young boys and girls and perpetuates the whole cycle.
Think for a moment about this cycle, and imagine it. Young boys see mothers behaving as servants - and grandmothers behaving far differently. Interesting.
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Sleepless in Tashkent
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